Not allowed to watch pre school acrobatics

[Howdidido]

Took DD to a new trail acrobatics class for 3 and 4 year olds. Was a bit confused when I was shown to a tiny room. Turns out they expected me to wait in this weird ante room while DD went to the class on her own.
Was in a village hall but run by a dance school I could only find on Facebook. There were only 3 kids in the class. The other two looked like they attend other dance classes with the school.
I said I'd rather watch and very reluctantly they said I could but I'd have to leave after 10 minutes. In the end I stayed for the whole class. DD (and other kids) weren't distracted at all by me. In fact the teacher was the one who asked me if I thought they were doing well. So i answered "amazing" and went back to sitting quietly trying not to be involved at all. The teacher at the end said she'd have to ask her boss if I could stay. I explained it's my one day with DD and I'd want to watch if we came back. Her boss approached me at the end and said they dont let anyone watch. So I said we wouldn't be able to come back sadly. Cos DD loved it.

It's quite a touchy class- e.g. with the teacher holding their hips at times
Is it weird? It feels off to me. Plus I want to see what shes doing. She does other classes with her dad and hes allowed to watch those..

It’s totally normal to be allowed to watch martial arts classes. These are completely different from dance / gymnastics. My dd has done both. Martial arts involves discussions, group / pair work and doesn’t constantly require the participants to be paying attention to everyone else. Children are also more likely to get hurt so having parents in the room is good practice. OTOH, timing and discipline is important in dance.

If your dd isn’t ready to be left it’s one thing, but if you’re not ready to leave your dd, that’s something else. For this reason, yabu to expect exceptions. Your dd will be in school soon and you’ll find it easier to leave her, I imagine. My dd wouldn’t stay in her dance classes without me when she moved from baby ballet to primary so she had to stop for 18 months until she was ready. Rules are there for a reason.

I think this has been the norm for decades - I was at ballet classes for years in mid/late 70s and parents didn’t come near the dance room, just helped with tying shoes properly then left. Only came at end of term for a show and prizes. The same applied to gymnastics, although parents could watch swimming classes if they wanted. I think it’s to avoid distraction or interruption by parents more than anything sinister.

All parents stay and watch the gymnastics classes that my children attend. There’s no viewing gallery though. I enjoy watching them.

Howdidido I think a lot depends on the context. Is the school well established, do you get a good vibe etc. At my daughter’s ballet, the teacher prefers parents for the first class only but I’ve seen her be more flexible with the dinky ones. The other classes we’ve done, we had been going to parent and toddler classes before so my child was familiar with the teachers or it is a set-up with a viewing gallery like swimming.

I used to be a nanny and the girls I looked after did dance. It was a new group that we went to, just started up, but an experienced teacher. First couple of weeks, parents were allowed to stay. After that, we were asked to wait in a side room for them or if we wanted, we were able to drop and run.

My own daughter now does dance and it’s very much encouraged to drop and run. There is an area to sit and wait, but parents do not go in to the dance studio, except for the once a half term ‘show’.

I imagine this rule has been put in place because parents are generally really distracting. It only takes a couple of parents to start a conversation and the whole group is put off. I’ve run children’s singing groups and this is generally what happens.

This might not be what happened at your class, but I suspect that’s because you were the only parent. Unfortunately, they can’t really differentiate between you and chatterbox sue who can’t keep her mouth closed for the duration of the class.

I have done both type of classes. In gymnastics we have done three, one parent participation and one watching and a third where I am not allowed to watch. She much prefers the ones which aren’t watched as the kids get distracted looking for mums and dads and don’t focus as well. Also noise from parents talking and things is distracting for them.

She’s Also done taekwondo which we were allowed to watch but from a viewing gallery and Ballet from the age of 3 which we aren’t allowed to watch. She much prefers the ones where parents aren’t there as there’s less pressure on her and less distraction.

When the parents are allowed to watch (one lesson per term) the kids seem to perform to their parent, mess up their steps as they’re too busy watching you to see if you’re watching them close enough or just generally distracted.

I trust her teachers. They’re All DBS checked and most of them actually teach their classes in the local primary schools as well (her gymnastics teacher teaches gymnastics at the primary school she will attend and the ballet teacher teaches ballet at the local private school) I think it would be strange not to trust them in this setting when I would have to trust them next year in the school?