To to leave DD alone when there are so workmen in house

[SoWhat21]

AAGH ive just realized Dd is off school the week I’ve organized to have a plumber come to do some essential work. She’s 13 and does would have stayed in house alone while I worked the mornings but not sure I should leave her now. He’s down a work for me in the past but still. Also have a painter coming but can probably reorganize him. Plumbers hard to get here.

It is not only your DD to worry about. You have to either cancel the work and rearrange, or find somewhere else for your daughter. Not right for the tradesperson to be put in that position.

Pretty sure my daughter's wouldn't have been happy with me leaving them to deal with the plumber at 13, so no I wouldn't. Out of interest, who was going to let the plumber in if,as far as you knew, your daughter wasn't going to be there?

Yep I think you’re all right. She wouldn’t be comfortable i don’t think and probably not fair on him either. I was probably going to let him in before I left for work or else leave a key for him. It’s a few day job so I might get her to come into my office one of the days (she can study there) meet friends or go to my SILs another. I’ll have to have a think!

No don't do it. Not fair on either of them.

Unfair on the plumber because of safeguarding reasons.
And because if something did happen to your daughter, he'd no doubt feel obliged to "look after her".

You might not have a choice anyway; workmen we've had have refused to come in if there's just a child in the house.

sorry X post!

I don't really see why it would be unfair on the plumber?

Because he may not feel comfortable working alone with a strange teenage girl?

I must be in the minority but I don't really see the issue ,obviously yes there is a risk but the risk is vanishingly small.

It's not really that people think the plumber is a paedophile or a rapist or anything, but most 13yo's wouldn't feel comfortable being alone around a strange man.

As previously given, the plumber & painter may not want to be in the house alone with someone under 18. Many companies have this as a safeguarding issue.

Don't leave her.

Personally I think it depends how well you know these tradespeople. If you know them well then they may be ok but I don't think I would leave my children on their own with them.
I work for a housing association and we aren't allowed to arrange work unless there is someone 18 or older present.
This is to protect both the child and the tradesperson; the child to ensure that nothing untoward happens and the tradesperson to ensure that false allegations aren't made.
It may sound quite dramatic but we have had examples of people being accused of all sorts when there wasn't an adult present which is why this rule is now in place.

I would think that most tradesmen would not put themselves in the position where they are alone with a minor. They are opening themselves up to all sorts of allegations. They don’t know your DD so have no idea if she would make an allegation or even misconstrue a throwaway remark etc.

My teenager would be horrified At the thought

We did have a handyman pop round the other week when I was at work but my 11 and 13 year olds were home from school.
In that situation there was 2 children to 1 man so the risk of something happening was much less likely and the handyman has been doing stuff for us for 10 years since they were small so they know him to a certain extent as in he’s not a complete stranger.

Just checked calendar and actually DH has the Monday off as he’s going to spend day with DD so that’s fine. They can let work men in and head off together. I might take a day off myself on the Tuesday and spend some time with her. We’re working through box set of Downton Abbey at the moment so we could binge watch some of that while her brothers are on school! By the Weds she’ll be sick of family time and have arranged to see her friends anyways I’m sure!

I wouldn't.

Our tradesmen had always said no children under 18 alone in the house with them. When I’ve mentioned my daughter will be home they have always asked how old she is.

You can’t leave her with them, because you would (in effect) be leaving her in their care, wouldn’t you? Not really on.

Sorry, just saw your update.

Even the BT, Sky ,Tesco delivery people state someone has to be over 18 otherwise they cant come in

I had a big complaint with this to BT. I was having major issues with them and India said they were sending an engineer. I told them not to as I was now dealing with UK team to resolve. They sent him anyway. I was at work. 14 year old DS was leaving for school as they arrived and he let them in saying his brother was home. 15 year old DS was at home but was on study leave so was still in bed, it being 8.15am. Engineer was in house doing fuck knows while a minor was asleep upstairs and no adult in the house.

To be fair, engineer might have thought "brother" was an adult given that 14 year old looked about 17/18 - he was over 6 foot and had a beard, and he shouldn't have let him in in the first place, but I was not happy!

I've left DSs about that age with workmen when we were getting our bathrooms replaced, but there were two of them and multiple workmen who'd already been in the house for a few days by then. We were all okay with it but I checked with them first.

i had a guy in - cant remember the job! - who wouldn't do the job with just 16 yr old ds in the house.

yup not appropriate she is too young and vulnerable. A friend of mine had a workman in the house and it was someone they knew - he took a shower (CF) and then wondered through naked.... her teen daughter had just got home from work! Thankfully nothing more than an eyeful and embarrassment all round. Bit of a shock though

I can't imagine the Plumber would want to take the responsibility. He shouldn't be in the position of being left alone with a strangers minor child.

I agree, I would not leave her alone with workmen/contractors, for the sake of everyone involved.