Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Builders requesting drinks

733 replies

crazydiamond222 · 06/02/2020 14:54

We are having an extension built whilst I am on maternity leave. I have a 3 month old. We have 2 builders on site laying foundations who started on monday. I have been making them a drink first thing and on one occasion made them a bacon sandwich. I don't offer drinks all day because my son keeps me very busy and only naps on me and it is a 4 month job so I don't want to have to do drinks all day for this period.

This afternoon whilst I was playing with my son in the living room one of the builders walked past the window and requested a coffee and tea. I thought the request to be a bit cheeky as a) he shouldn't have been looking in the living room and b) he shouldn't been requesting. I made him the drinks anyway leaving my son on the playmat getting upset. I rushed outside as my son was upset and I wanted to get back to him. When I took the drinks outside I tripped over rubble breaking a cup and scratching my arm. The builders reply was you should have passed it through the window. I remade the drinks but suggested in future setting up a kettle in the garage for them but they said they can just bring their own drinks. I am now feeling pretty upset with them.

Just needed to vent really but what do people feel is reasonable regarding builders and drinks.

OP posts:
Lipperfromchipper · 06/02/2020 20:28

@ALHanes2 YY to the design changes!! Wink I did a few during our build Blush nothing major but my builder was AMAZING (As was our architect, literally brought my dreams to life!) Smile

kingkuta · 06/02/2020 20:32

Yes of course YABU. Cant believe you only offered one drink in the morning to people you employed for manual labour. And then to accuse someone of being cheeky because they asked for a cuppa in the afternoon is just fucking awful. Smacks of superiority. I'm not surprised they told you not to bother again, bet you had a face like a smacked arse. Set up the kettle area up so that they can help themselves if you cant be arsed.

Mixingitall · 06/02/2020 20:33

I’m with you that with a small baby you may not wish to make tea all day.

I’ve just had builders finish a 4 month job, and I bought Yorkshire tea, instant coffee, cheap mugs and whilst they were outside gave them a large flask of hot water.
Me hen they moved inside I told them to help themselves. It worked well, my builder would bring me tea to my study when I was on back to back conference calls.
The key to a successful project is a good relationship, that starts with tea and biscuits!

Calledyoulastnightfromglasgow · 06/02/2020 20:36

I think most people offer tea/coffee to tradespeople.

You could just say “I am exhausted but please help yourself”

MrsArchchancellorRidcully · 06/02/2020 20:44

Yup. We had builders in for almost 6 months and had no kitchen for 6 weeks. I wfh so wasn't going to fetch n carry drinks as I have with to do. I set them up with kettle, water, milk, tea coffee etc and a massive box of biscuits and encouraged them to help themselves.

Set them up in the garage. Ignore what they said about refusing and be bright and breezy and go out for nice walks or to parent and navy cinema or just enjoy being able to push the pram round the shops without a toddler hanging off your leg.

ILearnedItFromABook · 06/02/2020 20:54

You're paying them to do a job. Honestly, it wouldn't occur to me to keep them fed and water on top of that! If they have access to water, surely that's enough (and they can fend for themselves). Wouldn't they bring their own things to eat and drink? They know what the job entails and should also know well enough what they'll need.

Meegeemoogee · 06/02/2020 20:56

I know this is going to be very unpopular but why don't manual labourers bring their own bloody food and drinks with them? Ffs! I used to work in a clinical position in a hospital where I was constantly on my feet and it was also a manual job and my employer didn't supply me with drinks and food. Why they hell don't they bring their own battered kettle, chipped mugs/travel mugs and a bottle of milk? It's the only job in the world where it is perfectly possible for you to cater for yourself but yet they don't because they are cheeky fuckers. Honestly, we should stop pandering to the misogynistic attitudes of a bunch of grown men. I would put out tea, coffee and milk for them and an old kettle if I had one but I would never make food for them. They don't need looking after, they are there to do a job and they should be able to look after themselves.

MimiLaRue · 06/02/2020 20:56

I doubt those guys will work for you again and I bet they do their best job on someone else house

hahaha! Let me get this straight- so, if the required cups of tea aren't made - the extension will be shoddy, cracked, unsafe, and liable to leak at the first drop of rain, right? I had no idea that builders made your building unsafe if they didnt get a specified amount of tea made for them. Not only is that unethical, worthy to make an appearance on rogue traders, is it even legal to do that? putting people's lives at risk because you didnt get made a cup of tea? LOL

LovePoppy · 06/02/2020 20:58

How do builders get anything done with everyone constantly offering them food and drinks?

Bananabixfloof · 06/02/2020 21:01

I confess I do leave out a selection of sturdier mugs and ones I don't like, rather than the nice thin bone china ones. Wouldn't dream of a jam jar, but feeling guilty now
I think I left 6 or so £1 mugs from the supermarket. Didnt care what happened to them. I don't remember any being broken. I bet if I'd left the matching set out they all would have been broken.

As for the fish and chips, it was the last day of the plasterer, he didnt want to come back the next day. He stayed til gone 10pm to get it done. I had turned up about 6pm to see how much more needed done to find him still there. I offered food we agreed fish and chips. We ate them in the back garden from an old bench sat in the late sun.
He was a nice guy.

Scarlettpixie · 06/02/2020 21:01

I think it is normal to make drinks for people working at your house. I would offer first thing, mid morning, lunch, mid afternoon. For a longer job, I have left a kettle, drinks etc in the utility for them to help themselves. Even if someone was only there for an hour I would offer a drink. They may have come from a previous job where someone didn’t offer!

Scarlettpixie · 06/02/2020 21:03

“How do builders get anything done with everyone constantly offering them food and drinks?”

Don’t you eat or drink during the working day Lovepoppy?

username58788 · 06/02/2020 21:03

So because we are paying them to do a job we should make them drinks or they won't do a good job. I'll say that to my boss tomorrow that I should get tea made for me or I won't do a good job . I'll be reminded that there is a kettle if I want a drink to MAKE MYSELF.
And those saying they are part of the family what !! Mind you the builders were at my house that long I thought about charging them rent .
Ffs Hmm

saraclara · 06/02/2020 21:04

Oh look, a naice MC mumsnetter who's never done a day of manual labour begruding workers a brew.

SHE OFFERED THEM A FUCKING TEA STATION AND THEY REFUSED

RTFT
Apparently making their own from her supplies isn't good enough. She has to be their waitress for the next few months.

I swear that 100 posters have told OP to put out a tea station, even though she's said that was what she'd planned BUT THEY REFUSED IT

MimiLaRue · 06/02/2020 21:06

So because we are paying them to do a job we should make them drinks or they won't do a good job

Seriously- I am gobsmacked people think this- not building a structure properly is fcking dangerous,- it could hurt someone if part of it collapsed etc Do people really think a builder would do this purely because he didnt get served 8 cups of tea on a lace doily throughout the day? bloody hell

MrsHarveySpecterV · 06/02/2020 21:15

We had work going on in our house on and off for three years. Finished one project then saved for the next and some of those were here for months at a time. I had two pregnancies and therefore two newborns during that time. I offered the workmen a drink on arrival, mid morning, lunchtime and mid afternoon. They would sometimes knock and ask if they could have a glass of water and I always said to help themselves. If I was going for a lie down (when pregnant) I'd let them know and to help themselves. No harm in being nice. Having said that my husband is a tradesman and I'd hate to think he wasn't offered a drink all day so maybe that's in my mind.

MintyMabel · 06/02/2020 21:16

If they had to ask, you were being a poor host.

Keep them topped up and they wouldn’t have to ask.

EmeraldShamrock · 06/02/2020 21:17

Do people really think a builder would do this purely because he didnt get served 8 cups of tea
Not at all or their insurance cover would be through the roof.
I don't think yabu. Dbro is a builder when in people's homes he brings a flask. A cup of tea is not a given, in some grander home's you come in the workers entrance, remove boots at all times leaving work area, he said in some homes he wouldn't get a drink of water on a hot day, a morning cuppa is enough. Do they visit a cafe near by at lunch, if not I'd offer morning, lunch time drinks or leave a flask with a few cans of coke for them to get their own.

MimiLaRue · 06/02/2020 21:22

Not at all or their insurance cover would be through the roof

Exactly. Yet loads of people are scaremongering in this thread saying "you must make them tea or else they wont do a good job!" A builder that did shoddy work due to insufficient supplies of tea wouldnt get very far on check a trade!

Ontheboardwalk · 06/02/2020 21:35

EntropyRising FrOg it’s sad isn’t it not giving them a proper mug

I'll admit to using and leaving out sturdier mugs I don’t see anything wrong with that. I use them myself when I’m pottering around.

A jam jar is just rude

katseyes7 · 06/02/2020 21:37

l always offer any workmen who come to the house a hot drink as soon as they get here!
l just reckon if you keep them sweet they'll be less inclined to mess about or cut corners. How much effort does it take to make a couple of mugs of tea?

username58788 · 06/02/2020 21:40

If they had to ask, you were being a poor host.
Your not hosting though you have tradesmen in to do a job .

74NewStreet · 06/02/2020 21:44

Arf at being a poor host Grin

TiddlestheCat · 06/02/2020 21:46

You give a man a mug if tea, you replenish him for an hour. You teach a man how to make a mug of tea, you replenish him for life.

A cheap kettle, some tea bags, a mug, sugar and milk on a tray, with some step by step instructions accompanied by IKEAesque flatpack illustrations, should suffice!

Oxfordnono12 · 06/02/2020 21:47

If I'm not busy I'll make them their lunch and offer tea etc. If I am I'll tell them to work away in the kitchen.

Dont put yourself under pressure! Men can be sometimes oblivious to fact you're looking after a baby. Next, tell him to do it himself.

Congratulations on your little baby and hope your enjoying your time off (minus the building)

Swipe left for the next trending thread