i have diagnosed BPD, major depressive disorder, generalised anxiety disorder, OCD and complex PTSD.
i take 425mg quetiapine daily, 20mg vortioxetine (new anti-depressant shown in trials to work with intractable depression, but i think it’s bottomed our on me now) and 45mg mirtazapine. i also have arthritis so wear an opiate patch and take 600mg pregablin daily.
even with this ridiculous cocktail of medication, i am a barely-functioning mess. at the moment i am not sleeping well at all, and am having trouble with intrusive thoughts and spiteful voices. you’re not alone in experiencing this, and yes it is frightening, but you are doing all the right things by keeping in touch with your team.
i keep being referred to the Access and Assessment Team and being turned down for secondary services. i have been under them on and off for about 8 years now, and have been hospitalised twice.
so, it’s back to the Link Worker at the GP surgery for me, before this gets any worse.
OP, you are doing brilliantly in telling your mental health team what’s going on with you. please keep doing this - at some point hopefully you will hit a sweet spot where the meds combine to give you some peace.
be well, and take good care. you’re not on your own in this fight.