To fly kick my 5 year old?

[golddustwomen]

If I hear 'Mommy, mommy, mommmyyyyyyyyyy' in this new high pitched screech she's now fond of doing one more time?
I've heard it at least 10 times since school finished at 3.15
Kill. Me.

Lighthearted.. maybe

Oof I’m a long ways off this phase with my DC but I’m dreading it (twins so it might be in stereo 😱) I’ve no advice but my Nan (I was raised by my Grandparents) used to threaten me with a wooden spoon when I screeched at her enough times, she never actually used it but I could see that there was a part of her that really wanted to, even if it was for a split second!

Oh shit twins... hearing two of it... I'm rocking bath and forth thinking about it
How old are your twins?

I'll swap you for my 8 year old. He's nearly 3 hours into a meltdown of epic proportions. He's autistic but today is a new low :-(

More lighthearted ...my 6 year old did that for a while. I used to pretend i couldn't hear annoying voices. Kept me amused and worked eventually.

My mum used to RACE up the stairs two at a time when I was a toddler just to get 2 minutes peace from me😂

And lock herself in the bathroom...

I did the same as spock, "hmmm that's a funny noise, I wonder what it was??? Shame I can't understand it. Oh well!" She soon let up.

Headphones and music to yourself for a bit in the kitchen. If you can't hear it it's not happening.

I just say I don't understand whining and to talk properly.

It's worse when he's unwell like now as he's constantly one small step away from a meltdown.

Mine cant open the stair gate, so sometimes I sit at the top of the stairs with a biscuit or 2 and just have a couple of minutes peace while world war 3 happens they play in the lounge.

YABU all children are a blessing and if you were a decent parent you would excitedly answer every whinge with enthusiasm and warmth, while appreciating every second of your existence.

Ugh I feel you. Apart from the conversations that go:
"mummy?"
"what?"
"mummy?"
"what?"
"mummy?"
"WHAT"
".... mummy?"

There's the endless "why? But why? Why? Why?

He's not even 3 yet

My 3 year old can scream at a pitch that feels like having hot wax poured into my ears and my brain. He's done it twice tonight when playing the "floor is lava" with big brother - big having much better co-ordination and pointing out loudly every time little fell in the lava

I miss the days where I could stuff a dummy into his mouth to silence him

My twins are 2yo @golddustwomen, DD and DS. Both delayed with talking but making good progress and I’ve been so obsessed with helping them get there (because of course I want to help in whatever way I can) but my own Mum keeps saying ‘you’ll want to go back when they do!’ 😂

My Mum raised my youngest DBro and Dsis and her answer was to bribe them with the “who out of all 3 of us can be quiet the longest?” game - with chocolate for the winner. I sat in minor lighthearted judgment and thought to myself ‘I’ll never bribe my DC to behave’ - I crumbled on that one by the 1.5yr mark with my twins .

I always use to think that dc should come with (a) a volume control and/or (b) a remote control where you could freeze &/or put on mute

@mumwon Snap!!!

I prefer to hide in the kitchen eating biscuits (refer back to user name)

I've got permanent hearing loss on one side where some vile little shit walked up to me in class and deliberately screamed at full volume (high b flat if anybody's wondering) an inch away from my ear in class.

How I didn't lamp the vicious little prick, I don't know - possibly being doubled over in agony with a ruptured eardrum whilst he laughed inanely at what he'd done affected my punching arm as much as it did my balance for the net four months. Apparently, he did it because I was speaking to another kid instead of him.

I bet he started with a whine and a screech to get attention.

Just drop kick her before she permanently disables someone. I am joking

Use ear filters to block it out until she realises it doesn't get her anywhere. So she doesn't think it's so fucking funny aged 12.

In addition, make sure they use words. Thanks to prick child, I haven't the slightest hope of ever knowing what the mumbly little whisperers want from me. Especially because they deliberately turn their heads and make a point of not ever moving their lips enough for me to even lipread. And then start fucking crying at me because I can't hear them from a distance of six foot with constant background noise and I've dared to ask them to repeat themselves.

Haha haha. I’ve threatened to change my name and not tell them what it is.
Sometimes it stops the stuck record... sometimes it doesn’t!

@mumwon - when my dses were little, I was sure that, if I looked properly, I’d find where the batteries were, and I could take them out for an hour or so. Maybe a day. OK - three months. Oh who am I kidding - they might still be out, and all three of them are in their twenties!

We've not had the screeching but just the repetitive 'mum' voice, I changed my name to 'daddy' at least that way DH got the full effect too

actually I was a cm - was doing an extended (evening!) course on cm issues - tutor (who was not a child carer) asks "what do you do if stressed" Me "Have a cup of tea" "No" she says " seriously, what do you do if your REALLY stressed" Me looking at her "Have another cup of tea?" & you know its a bad day when you have microwaved your tea 3 times...

I changed mine to Fifi for a while after a couple of weeks of two kids going Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum like Bart and Lisa do 'will you take us to Mount Splashmore' in the Simpsons.

Just for a short time - not the six years they spent yelling FIFI! afterwards when I refused to respond to them cheeky sods could always make me laugh with that . Sounded like a pair of birds chirping constantly at me.

Wish I could still hear them sometimes. I miss them being little and pestering the ever living wotsits out of me each evening.

@Straycatstrut hot wax in my ears is EXACTLY how it feels !! You have hit the nail on the head completely.

Anyone else's child call your name, you look at them, they can see you looking, your staring into each other's eyes, yet they still repeat 'mom' 'mom' 'mommy' and refuse to say anything else until you've said the fucking word yes????

YANBU

My daughter is almost 3 and is going through a phase where she repeats 'mummy where are you?' a million times a day. Quite often she is staring directly at me