Just burnt my lips

[CornishPorsche]

FFS.

My Mum always told me not to lick my knife. My Dad and I have always done it though.

Today I was spreading butter on toast and making a cuppa, but the butter was like ice, so not going far.

I popped the butter knife into the gas flame on the cooker while the kettle boiled. Spread the butter easily with the hot knife, then licked the knife, which was fine until I closed my lips on the end by the handle.

Burning hot.

I am currently typing this while sitting with my lips into a very full cup of cold water, trying to treat it.

Maybe this will cure me of licking knives....

AIBU to ask for your stupid injuries so I am not alone?

@LoudBatPerson - I have burnt my nipple in the exact same way! Cooking in just a vest, leaned over the pot, and the steam shot out and burned my nipple. Absolute agony - I was crying with the pain. And it blistered too.

A couple of years ago I walked Into the bedroom, and for some reason there was a coat hanger on the floor. The metal bit was sticking up and I stood on it, staggered from the pain, fell over some guitars in the corner, broke the wardrobe door with my head, skinned my arm pretty badly on something (don't know what) and broke two of my toes.

I have lots and lots of freak accidents.

I used to live in a flat on a lane with a dead-end. Houses along one side and a wall at the back. Coming home one night, phone in hand mumsnetting, I walked past my door and straight into the wall. Had an impressive shiner for the best part of a week

I usually burn my mouth with pasta. I once lifted a piece out to check it was ‘done’ and it was a pasta shell full of boiling water, that bloody hurt.

To soften butter out it on a plate and full a glass with hot water. Once the glass is warm empty the water out. Put the warm glass upside down over the butter. Soft in seconds and you can lick the knife.

I get in and out of cars quite successfully many times a day. Once in a blue moon I get the sequence of getting in wrong.

Correct sequence: sit on seat...feet in...head in...close door...
Wrong sequence: sit on seat...feet in...close door...crush head...

I tried to instinctively swat a fly away - but my phone was in my hand, and I essentially threw the phone full force on to the my foot.

Kicked the shower cubicle and broke my toe because instead of turning my foot to go towards the toilet, I kept walking.

Hit myself in the teeth with a hot cup when trying to drink newly made tea, it hurt like fuck so I recoiled, and spilled boiling tea down my front and legs.

Trapped my inner labia in the zip of very tight jeans. It's the last fucking time I wore "sexy undies" that let tiny bits of skin poke through.

Punched myself in the face trying to open a stuck zip (I've done that several times).

I blame it on a neurological condition that makes my coordination buggered, but to be honest I've forever been a clumsy fucker...

Burnt my belly when pregnant while ironing! Forgot i was nearer the iron than usual! Bloody sore and embarrassing at the same time.

I had an obstetric appoint a couple of days later. The Dr had 2 students with him and asked if i minded them being there which i didnt.
When he exposed my belly to examine me he smiled and turned to the students and asked them to identify the mark on my skin. Neither had a clue. He laughed and told them exactly what it was and said they should expect to see a lot of these burns in this line of medicine.😄😄

I had a very similar burn a couple of years ago when I stirred butter in a frying pan with a metal spoon, the put the whole spoon in my mouth and closed my lips round it, and pulled it out.

I had an aloe vera plant which I butchered and put in the fridge and sucked for a few days, that worked really well. Also very cold cucumber sticks to suck worked well. And painkillers!

I've taken paracetamol and ibuprofen, that's really helped. I've got an ice pack I keep resting on my face.

I killed my aloe plant over the winter, so I'm using aloe from a tube.

You lot are ace.

I definitely did not ever catch a very spiny cactus that I'd knocked off the windowsill. Nope, not me. And I certainly didn't spend several days after extracting spines from my hand from aforementioned, non-existent cactus. I can't have done any of that, because it's a bloody stupid thing to do. Isn't it?

I also didn't try to catch a big, sharp knife I knocked off the kitchen bench, either and cut a huge gash at the base of my thumb. Nopitty nope-nope.

There's a theme here

I was ironing once, put the iron down to answer the phone and then went back to it. For some reason I wasn't expecting it to be as heavy as it was and sort of jumped in surprise and managed to swipe the red hot iron right across my cheek!

I also have a nice inch long scar along the back of my hand from when I was straightening my hair while watching TV... and missed my hair.

OH and the scar under my nose from when I was skateboarding as a child and literally fell flat on my face.

Some of these are making me cringe in horror! Especially the nipple injuries

I punched myself in the face pulling my cardi sleeve up. Hand slipped - bosh.

I steamed my arm reaching over the kettle to open a cupboard. My brain did not compute what the pain was so I just stood there wondering why my arm hurt while continuing to scald myself.

For some reason I once decided to shut the car door with my left hand, leaving my right holding the edge of the console - the edge where the console meets the door when the door is closed. The door shut and caught the latch so I had to scrabble around to reopen it with my other hand still trapped.

Not me but a work colleague once dropped a massive needle + syringe. Tried to catch it. Straight through her palm.

I once burned my chin on the fryer at a chip shop.

also didn't try to catch a big, sharp knife I knocked off the kitchen bench, either and cut a huge gash at the base of my thumb. I didn't do that with a razor blade. 60 years later I still have the scar. I have a matching scar on the same finger on the opposite hand, but I can't remember the details of that one, except that it also involved a razor.

Oh my God, I am just a walking accident.
Gave myself concussion getting into my car once.
I gave myself an eye infection. The cause is still unknown - it was either the toenail I clipped off my son that landed in my eye or 5 minutes later, opening my oven and burning my eyeballs.
I was once shaving my legs in the bath and as my legs were tucked up with my boobs resting on my knee, I sliced my nipple with the razor.

I bent down to check something in the oven , wondered what the smell was and realised I'd set my hair on fire on the gas hob

I sat my bare arse down on a pair of straighteners when I was about 19. I couldn't sit down without pain for weeks. Somehow it didn't scar, and I've no idea how as I had massive crusted over burns that needed dressed frequently. Don't straighten your hair in the altogether, folks.

God I'm thinking of all my other stupid injuries now.

Fell down the stairs with a massive box of text books. Braced myself with my feet, tried not to drop the box got some unfathomable reason, and sprained my ankle so badly it still hurts in the night 5yrs later.

Slit my little finger open with a knife as I tried to take the plastic wrapping off a cucumber.

Burned my palm VERY badly - looking back, I should have gone to hospital. I worked in a kitchen, and leant my hand on the hotplate while chatting to a waitress, thinking I was leaning on the table. Nope. The smell was what alerted me to it. Thr rest of the service was me cooking with my left hand behind my back, wrapped in a wet cloth and cling film. Every time I tried to use it, it was agony. Someone else did the washing-up and clean down for me that night!

Mouth is less sore, but I'm trying not to let it dry up too much. I am PRAYING it won't be stuck together in the morning

I hope the burn heals quickly, Cornish!
Many years ago, a friend told me vinegar could ease the painful itchiness of a vaginal infection. I daubed it on. My hair stood on end as the vinegar dived into every crevice, but I toughed it out because I was desperate.
My friend rang the next morning and asked "Did I tell you, you have to dilute it with six parts of water?"
"No," I said. "You did not tell me."
We're still friends. But I no longer take her medical advice ....

I got a third degree burn from falling asleep on a hot water bottle. I was very tired so it was very prolonged and the result was horrendous. I had to go to hospital! I now have scarring and no feeling in the skin where it was, I had to have it dressed for what felt like forever and even now it’s still not properly healed and will burn again in even some much as a hot shower.

Don’t use hot water bottles on a Friday night after a busy week at work and the kids are all out!!! Sleep is DANGEROUS!!

I did almost exactly the same thing OP a few weeks ago. Fried some halloumi to make a wrap and went off to eat it leaving the fork in the frying pan.

I'd overloaded the wrap so went back to get the fork but I didn't realise I'd left the hob burning so the pan and fork were red hot. I also blistered all four corners of my mouth.

The good news is it healed really quickly. Mostly gone after a day and no trace by day 3. Hope yours heals as fast.

Yep. When DD was little I had a chance at having a night out. Single parent, DM babysitting. I thought I'd make an effort so decided to curl my hair. Picked up the hot end of the curling tongs. Lovely hiss as they melted my finger tips.

Oh no - I've been laughing and groaning as I read this thread. Sending get-well-soon wishes to all those still suffering from latest accidents!

Decades ago I was sawing wood with my sister, who lived in the country, and I was warbling about the joys of a peaceful country life as the two-handled saw hit a knot hole, bounced and sliced my finger. Looking at the scar now.

And remembering the ancient gas cooker we had till last year, with the grill at about waist level, so i was always bending down to see if it had lit just at the moment it whooshed into life. The first time I thought I had cooked my eyeballs. DH got quite used to the smell of burning hair.

I genuinely walked into a door once, just because I hadn't bothered to push it open far enough. The stupidity of it stunned me as much as the pain in my nose. And I used to burn my arms on the oven so often that DH bought me a pair of elbow-length oven gloves. He said he was worried our GP was starting to give him dirty looks ...

We are all survivors! Good night and take care now ...

Penguins that just made me gasp! That sounds so painful