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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think she's being a CF

67 replies

Winterwonderland10 · 21/01/2020 07:19

Have been friends with this person since I was in 1st school. So a quite a long time. I wouldn't say she's an extremely close friend probably more of an acquaintance I see now and then.
Anyway I've begun a hobby making things and have now set it up to sell things. She asked if I could make herself one of my products. I said yea sure as it was only 1 thing. I saw her a week ago and then she asks for some thing for her DD so I say yes. It's quite small so not a problem. Then she gets home and asks if I can make her other DD and DS something she says she would pay but I know she wouldn't if I didn't press her. So I say ok I'll charge you cost price for the extra 2 things she wants. I have given her my bank details. She says she will pay me. However not been paid. It's not a huge amount but more the principal! Then she says a few days later I might ask you to make something else for one of her children!! And yesterday I put a pic up of a new product and she messaged say I want one of those! AIBU to think she's now just being a CF. I'm not a charity and these products take time and money to make. Just because I know her doesn't mean she can take advantage of me. So what shall I do as she hasn't paid me? I haven't begun them yet as I haven't received the money. Should I say some thing?

OP posts:

IntermittentParps · 21/01/2020 10:49

'Sure, here are my bank details again and once I receive payment for the items you have already, plus the £xx for these new ones, I'll start on them. Thanks!'

Easy.

Arthritica · 21/01/2020 10:52

The suggestions to refer her to your Etsy/whatever are sound. "Just pop the request through my shop. I need to keep a record of orders and invoices now I'm self employed."

RuggerHug · 21/01/2020 10:57

Well you can't buy materials to start making it if she doesn't pay so just don't start it. Every time she asks, tell her you can't buy until paid and keep repeating.

Drum2018 · 21/01/2020 10:58

I had set up an etsy shop and this product she said she wanted was clearly marked with a price. I may just send a reminder message in a few days asking about the money as I need to buy materials for it

Send her a message reminding her of how much she owes you so far and give your bank details again. Then attach a link to the etsy site and let her pay via etsy for any further orders. That way the lines don't get blurred. If she doesn't want to pay full price she can do without.

And don't get into the habit of giving freebies to other closer friends. Charge something so nobody takes the piss.

Dustarr73 · 21/01/2020 12:15

From now on just sell at full price,then there can be no mistakes.It makes it easier for everyone to be on the same page.

Highonpotandused · 21/01/2020 12:54

A real friend supports a new business venture and buys things out of loyalty.

Except MLM. That’s not business.

andyjusthangingaround · 21/01/2020 13:09

@GiveHerHellFromUs - this!
The next time she says she wants more say "no problem that's x amount (selling price). If you can send the money over they'll be made and ready by x date."

She is really CF to keep asking for more. One might wonder whether she wants to sell them on

Original poster

Winterwonderland10 · 21/01/2020 22:10

Thanks everyone for your advice. I'm quickly learning! I'm not going to message her. I'm just not going to make what she's asked for until she pays me. I'm not going to let her be a CF. And from now on she's getting full priced items

OP posts:

monkeymonkey2010 · 21/01/2020 23:29

Just tell people you need deposit/cost upfront to buy the materials....and no you don't have any 'leftover stock' as it's all accounted for.

Sh05 · 21/01/2020 23:45

Say yeah not problem you'll be one of my best customers at this rate, that's £10 or whatever it costs I'll make a start once you've transferred me the money in, I sent you the details for the other two, let me know once it's gone in.

This is exactly what you should do

Original poster

Winterwonderland10 · 22/01/2020 12:47

She's just messaged me saying she needs to send me the money....however no money yet

OP posts:

Sh05 · 22/01/2020 14:51

Text her back saying, let me know once you've transferred so I can go and get the equipment I'll need for your order

NearlyGranny · 22/01/2020 14:56

Told you she needs to transfer the money? But you knew that already! 🤔

IntermittentParps · 22/01/2020 15:27

She's just messaged me saying she needs to send me the money.

Reply:
'Yes, you do. The full amount is £xx.xx. Thanks!'

Original poster

Winterwonderland10 · 22/01/2020 17:34

I have just more of a rant really. Its like she's expecting me to say ah no it's ok. Also I just wanted to clarify what she wanted she's now changed her mind and asked for more expensive things. Wish I never mentioned anything to her now

OP posts:

eddielizzard · 22/01/2020 17:48

I'd text back and say please send me an email with exactly what you want and I'll send you the invoice. Then send her an invoice for the full amount. Treat her like a customer. Get it all in writing. She's going to try and mess you around because she doesn't value your time - yet.

Drum2018 · 22/01/2020 19:01

Reply with the full amount owed so far and your bank details again - so she has no excuse to short change you. When it is in your bank account text her to confirm receipt and at that point send the etsy link for the next order. I assume she'll have to pay upfront via etsy.

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