AIBU to think she's being a CF

[Winterwonderland10]

Have been friends with this person since I was in 1st school. So a quite a long time. I wouldn't say she's an extremely close friend probably more of an acquaintance I see now and then.
Anyway I've begun a hobby making things and have now set it up to sell things. She asked if I could make herself one of my products. I said yea sure as it was only 1 thing. I saw her a week ago and then she asks for some thing for her DD so I say yes. It's quite small so not a problem. Then she gets home and asks if I can make her other DD and DS something she says she would pay but I know she wouldn't if I didn't press her. So I say ok I'll charge you cost price for the extra 2 things she wants. I have given her my bank details. She says she will pay me. However not been paid. It's not a huge amount but more the principal! Then she says a few days later I might ask you to make something else for one of her children!! And yesterday I put a pic up of a new product and she messaged say I want one of those! AIBU to think she's now just being a CF. I'm not a charity and these products take time and money to make. Just because I know her doesn't mean she can take advantage of me. So what shall I do as she hasn't paid me? I haven't begun them yet as I haven't received the money. Should I say some thing?

AIBU to think she's now just being a CF.
YANBU
She might even be one of those extra-entitled CF's who imagine they are doing their favour-giver a favour iyswim.

And yesterday I put a pic up of a new product and she messaged say I want one of those!
Thanks for the order! I'm properly up & running now so need to formalise - I can make he Thing in {X days} & cost is {£YY}.
As soon as your payment hits my account I'll get started for you!
Best wishes

What have you set up to sell the products? Do you have a business Paypal? Etsy shop? Business FB page with shop? If so, for Paypal, send her an invoice and within the T&C section detail what the product is as well as terms such as x product to be custom made by x date, to be posted (or collected by x date), x amount as non refundable deposit with x amount to be paid upon completion OR x product to be made by x date and payment to be recurved by x date in order for materials to be purchased.

If Etsy, create a custom listing for her.

Same if using a business FB page (usually don’t via shopify if you don’t have Etsy or your own website).

You then yell her this invoice:listing becomes your worksheet for your products and is needed for your accounts. Tell her as this venture is taking off, you need to run it as a business with a paper trail.

Nip this kind of thing in the bud now as others could do the same. It will also help you track your expenditure.

When an acquaintance started doing something similar a couple of years ago (making stuff to sell) I bought one straight away at full price from Etsy to support her even though it wasn't something I really needed, and cost more that I would normally have paid for a similar item - not request freebies!

In your shoes, wouldn't offer her a discount in future (unless you selling to her direct means no sales commission from etsy/ebay wherever) - and certainly no more goods until she's paid what she agreed to on the items that she's already had.

She's being cheeky. When I worked in retail this girl I knew from school used to come in and say... Here can I have your discount card. For the sake of saving 10% in a highstreet store for God sake.

If I ask family or friends for something I always say I don't want mates rates. I just want you to do it because I trust you. The fact she's not clicking on how rude she is being means she is ignorant and a taker on life. Supporting and giving back is much more important in a friendship. She should be helping your business not taking freebie after freebie

Yabu you've let her take advantage. Just tell her how much they are and ask if she'd like to place an order.

She might not realise she needs to pay in advance, so let her know that.

Also, in future charge her the full amount.

@Winterwonderland10

Then she gets home and asks if I can make her other DD and DS something she says she would pay but I know she wouldn't if I didn't press her.

If you knew she wouldnt pay,then why did you make her the item.

So she owes you for 3 things now,and hasnt paid.I think you need to write some terms and conditions and stick to them.

Get her to pay for the other thngs and the thing she wants you to make.Make it and dont take orders from her again.Its not worth the hassle.

I'm running short on materials, did you send the money for the other 2 items?

What BugBasher said

She is indeed a CF but you are also at fault here. If your items are genuinely well made and worth the prices you are charging you should not be giving them away for free. You need to value your skills and time appropriately and charge for them consistently. If you don’t put a value on your skills and time you can’t expect other people to value them. A plumber wouldn’t fix a tap for an acquaintance free of charge on the basis that it was an quick , inexpensive job for him to do.

That’s not to say you shouldn’t make a gift of your products/time to genuine friends and family or even charge mates rates when you choose to, but if you want people to value what you do you need to start acting like a professional.

Blank the CF and write the money off or tell her you are so busy you are only taking commissions paid in advance now and give her your bank details. Then move into 2020 with a positive mindset.

She might work out to be a good customer but only if she gets the hang of: goods and services = payment!

To clear some things up I haven't started making the items yet as I'm waiting for payment. If someone sends you bank details you don't just not pay. I gave her 2 items as goodwill and then 2 items at cost but yes as other people have said I've realised my mistake and will no longer be charging at cost for not so close friends. I just can't believe the cheek of her to keep saying she wants things and expects to be for free. I had set up an etsy shop and this product she said she wanted was clearly marked with a price. I may just send a reminder message in a few days asking about the money as I need to buy materials for it.

If the items you're making are not personalised or sized, I'd make what she wants and post a picture in your Etsy shop with the price. Then message her that she'd better be quick if she wants her item because seeing she didn't send the money yet, it's up for grabs by anyone willing to pay.

You've turned a hobby into a business, not a charity!

Are the items personalised, or would you be able to sell them in your etsy shop? If they're not personalised, make the item, send her a picture saying it's ready and you will post/give to to her once the money is in your account. If she's not forthcoming with the money upload it to your etsy shop.

She is being very cheeky. Sand her a link to your Etsy page and tell her she can purchase it from there.

'That's great, they are £x each. If you want to go ahead let me know when you've pinged the money across and I'll get cracking'.

Yes, send this.

I have a craft product that I sell. For friends I either make them something as a gift (birthday, xmas), or if they order they pay full price. You have to recognise the cost of your time. It's inevitable that some friends will also be customers, by treating them as customers you will avoid all sorts of hassle - as you're discovering - and be paid what your time and effort are worth.

So tell her to buy through Etsy then. You can't place the order without paying so that solves the problem.

Send her a message saying that you're pleased she likes the stuff and here's where she can order it - with a link to your page.

I voted YABU, @Winterwonderland10, because, while she is indeed a CF, you are the person who is allowing her to get away with it. Put your foot down, and it'll be sorted in no time - whether that means she pays, or you never hear from her again.

Just say you need paying so you can buy materials to make what she has requested..think shes pushing her luck for a few freebies...

I think sometimes we all need a CF in life, to make us pause and reassess our self worth (and the value of our talents and efforts!).

You’re learning some valuable lessons thanks to her gobsmacking attitude. Better through her than strangers/customers. Now you know to put the brakes firmly on the gravy train ‘freebies’, you’ve got some terrific responses from this thread ready to go, and a new strength of purpose.

One day you might thank her publicly from a podium ‘...and to Sally, without whose Cheeky Fuckery in the early days, I might have undervalued my business and creative skills for ages. Sally, hope you’ve found someone else to steal from, wherever you are. Ironic that if you’d been a better friend, you’d be invited to my island in the Bahamas for a fortnight of sensational freebies. Oh well.’

She's being cheeky but you're letting her.

You need to put your foot down now and also think about what you will say to all friends and acquaintances who ask for items in the future.
I run my own business and I've had to learn how to deal with this too.

Any time you spend making something (or in my case, providing a service) for friends for free or cost price is time that you do not have available to "sell" to another customer. You are selling your time in effect and then there is the price for the materials on top of this.

Do not make things for other people for free or at cost price.
Do not start making things for her at cost price until she pays and the next time she asks tell her that you are no longer able to do this at cost price - she has already had 2 items free and 2 items at cost price - as you need all of your time to make orders for customers paying the full price as the business has to turn a profit. She is welcome to order anything else she would like through your online shop (or whatever platform you are selling through).

I wouldn't bother reminding her about the payment for the 2 items at cost price either. You've asked her for the money. She hasn't paid. Therefore you can assume she no longer wants the items. And if she asks where the items are you can tell her that.

She is a bit of a CF but you need to have strategies in place for this as she won't be the only CF to cross your path when running a business like this.

My rule now is no freebies at the beginning for anyone. I do have some friends and some customers who have used my services (sounds rude... but couldn't think of a better way of saying it - I'm not a prostitute, promise) for a long time and I do occasionally give them the odd free half hour or do something extra for them but under no circumstances does anyone get freebies at the beginning.

A real friend supports a new business venture and buys things out of loyalty.

This

I have bought so many things that I have no use for, were not my taste and I have no idea how to use all because a friend started a business and I am showing my support. It has never dawned on me to ask for a discount or freebies even when I was a skint student. I buy, wear/use and advertise on their behalf (pass a card or give a number if someone asks or compliments the item).

First, the "I want that" is not, in my opinion, an order. I say things like that on posts all the time. But "I want" is not a "I am going to buy" or, even in CF land a "You must give me one." So on the "I want" post just reply - if you want to order one, you can do it via the website". If she asks in person, tell her you'll happily make and deliver one but you'll need full price.

For the ones she agreed to pay for but hasn't, even at discounted price, you need to send her a message saying, "Please can you send over the money for materials for the [pieces] I delivered last week." If she still doesn't, you'll need to be firmer, pointing out that you need the money as your business has costs.

This is actually a bug bear of mind. DH's job is one people often ask him to do as a favour for a friend or whatever. To be honest, he mostly doesn't mind and actually would find being offered money uncomfortable. But what never ceases to amaze me is how often at this sort of event people will make comments like, "[name] is so brilliant. I can't believe how good he is." (Really? Because you KNOW he does this for a living right so....?). Or they'll say things like, "if you ever need a favour, just let me know". I mean, how is that helpful? Are you going to do his tax for free now Mr accountant?

The last time he did this, I was completely GOBSMACKED to discover that at the bar DH was expected to pay for his own drinks. He provided a full on service for free and they couldn't even buy him a beer?!