DH Snoring!!

[BabyBunnyMama]

This is all probably going to sound very dramatic but everything does at almost 2:30am.

My husband snores like nothing I've ever heard before! Since having our DD it's became a real issue where I am unable to sleep properly because of it (I am more sensitive to sounds as I'm listening out for her?) and it's at the point that I am losing a lot of sleep because of it and making me feel pretty run down during the day sometimes.

I started wearing earplugs most nights a few months ago and that's helped, but some nights (like tonight) even they won't drown out the sound enough for me to get back to sleep.

I don't know what to do! I know it's not his fault, I've told him to go see a Dr but even then I don't have a lot of hope it's something that can be fixed? A spare bed isn't an option and also we're going on holiday in a few months and DD is such a light sleeper I have no idea how she's going to get any sleep sharing a room with us.

It's just so frustrating. DD is only 9 months and sleeping through the night but I still rarely have a night where I'm not disturbed. I don't think I've had a proper nights sleep since before she was born and his snoring didn't bother me. Literally feel like it's ruining my life 😭

Sorry for the long post and the dramatics, I'll get over it in the morning but just sooooo frustrated at the minute.

Is he fat? Does he lie on his back? Will he roll over?

Yes it can be fixed. DH was like this, took me two years to get him to go to the doctor, and he only did when he felt like it was affecting his work life. He now has to wear a sleep mask for life or lose his driving licence.
The same with my father, although that took us about 20 years to get him to go. All snoring has disappeared for both DHs machine is like a white noise machine that helps me to get go sleep now.
All men in both families snore the same. They are carrying a bit too much weight but for both of them the DRs have said it's genetic more than weight. My DH was just as bad when he was skinny as he is now that he's wearing several winters worth of weight.

Sorry, no suggestions but I'm hoping for good advice for a similar problem.

You must be worn out. You have my sympathy.

I've just spent the night on the sofa due to snoring. He sounds like a fucking pneumatic drill.. he has been to the Dr and all they said was lose some weight. He snored when I first met him and he was way slimmer then. I've given up and get quite shitty with him and he is very apologetic. It sucks

He needs to go to the GP. Some snorers can stop breathing for pockets of time and put a strain on their heart. That’s when CPAP machines are useful.

I'm in a similar situation- 4yo and 9mo DC, DH's snoring wasn't too bad before DS1 but since he arrived either it's got significantly worse, I've become significantly more sensitive to noise (both DC fairly rubbish sleepers) or both. Either way, he gets all hangdog about it 'it's not my fault, I don't mean to do it, you can't be upset with me' and refuses to actually do anything, I don't get to sleep and it's just miserable. My entire 2nd pregnancy and 90% of nights since have been spent in the spare room. I actively avoid organising holidays as don't want to have to not sleep in the same room. He's also surprised it has affected intimacy... well, lack of sleep and him not giving two shits about how he severely impacts my quality of life will do that!

On the bright side, that was cathartic

He does need to see a doctor. Yes it could be sleep apnoea which @Paperdolly is referring to or it could be something completely different. My dad had an issue with his nose. They cauterised it and his snoring stopped. Takes all of 5 minutes and he was uncomfortable for a day or so.

It could be something really minor.

I feel your pain. Snoring is caused by a variety of things.
Upper airway - obstruction in nose or sinus.
Mid airway can be lower jaw falling backwards during sleep. This type of snoring is helped by wearing an appliance that keeps the jaw in forward position. Affects slim people .
Third cause is a flaccid airway which narrows or closes up during sleep. This is helped by C pap. Which essentially blows air through the airway.
My advice is to start with GP. Address weight issues if any. Also see an Rabat to check for sinus or nasal issues.
It's a tough one to crack. I am medical and my husband has. Just had sinus so. At the moment, no improvement so we may have to move onto another approach. He is slim and fit.

I feel your pain OP, I have a similar problem with my DH, who as if yet is adamant he doesn't need to see a doctor about it. I now sleep in a spare room but I can still hear him and want to kill him a lot less.

No advice unfortunately, but you have my sympathies.

How is a spare bed not an option? You could change the sofa for a sofabed, or put a mattrass in your DC's room.

Thanks for your replies! I will book DH an appointment with the GP. His mum has sleep apnoea (not sure if it's hereditary?) and I have noticed his breathing is unusual sometimes like as if he is stopping then after what feels like forever he does a big startled noise which is awful.

@Besidesthepoint Recently bought new sofas so cannot afford to be replacing them for sofa beds and DD's room is really narrow and oddly laid out so nowhere near enough room for a mattress on her floor. Not really willing to do that even if there was as it's not really a long term solution and think it would disturb her sleep.

Thanks again everyone, got a bit more sleep and knowing I'm not alone and there is a potential solution has made me feel like the world isn't ending 😆

Oh you’re not alone BabyBunnyMama. 🙄😊

go to amplifon and get some custom made earplugs to specifically block out snoring.

You've described the symptoms of sleep apnea. You need to insist your DH sees his doctor.

If the snoring can't be stopped then separate bedrooms is the long term solution. It's that or separate houses when you get a divorce.

@safariboot they can only have separate bedrooms if they have a spare bedroom. Why's it always assumed on MN that people have spare bedrooms? OP could say she had 7 kids and someone would still pipe up and tell her to sleep in the spare room.

@safariboot We don't have the luxury of having separate bedrooms and I really don't think a mattress on my child's floor is a long term option - I'd rather we took turns sleeping on the sofa than that 😬 But we have an appointment booked for next week so hopefully we can get some help. Also not going to get a divorce because of it. As much as it drives me insane to not be able to sleep, think that's an extreme solution too lol

@TeddTess Oh I will have a look - I'm just worried I wouldn't hear DD - I can still hear everything with the foam ones, just drowns the snoring out enough for me to sleep most of the time.

Thanks again everyone 😊

@GiveHerHellFromUs Thank you 😆 Was thinking this myself, I thought putting in the original post that a spare bed isn't an option would clarify this but apparently not lol

Boots sell their own brand silicone earbuds. They are much better than the foam ones I’ve found. 3 pairs for under a fiver! My daughter wears them when it’s her night off patrol for the babies and says she sleeps really well and wakes up refreshed. Not many can say that!!! (There are other brands) 😊

@Paperdolly Oh that sounds good - I will have a look into them! I don't really get a night off as DH is such a deep sleeper he doesn't hear DD if she wakes up so wonder if they'd be too good for me to use 😬 DD is off for a sleepover at the weekend though so I'll deffo look to get some for then 😆

👍🏻

Had similar issues OP, I really sympathise. I was at my wits end!
Enquired at dentist about a snore guard but was told it was unlikely to work and cost £££££
So DH bought a cheap neck support and wedge pillow from Amazon and the snoring ended immediately. It took him a few nights to get used to them-he's practically upright when he sleeps but it's resolved the issue. He can still snore if he had a few drinks but I can live with that and as we've got kids, we don't go out much anyway!
I've screenshot the things DH ordered (from Amazon I think, not the Wish website) just to give you an idea.
Good luck

As well as snoring, my DH has taken to involuntarily twitching his left leg every 30 seconds during REM sleep ie until 3am. It’s got a name - periodic limb movement disorder. Aargh.

@icanclearabuffet oh thank you, never seen anything like it! He is currently using 2 pillows and 2 cushions to prop himself up and it does help sometimes so that might do a better job 😊

@figmentofmyimagination ah how annoying! Bad enough trying to find something to drown the sound out never mind movement too! 😣

I am a light sleeper, DH sleeps like the dead and snores unbelievably loud.

He has a mouth guard and nasal spray which helps a tiny bit and I use ear plugs. He's often banished to sleep on the sofa but I can hear him through the walls.

I'm a demon if I don't get enough sleep but after a few days of him on the sofa I really miss him.

OMG @Figmentofmyimagination that's my DH! Left leg too!! Twitching and snoring most of the night. Drives me insane.

I feel you OP. After 12 years I've finally got DH in to see the Dr, he's going this week