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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ‘be out’ when the Jehovah’s witnesses come back

289 replies

Lauriepop95 · 18/01/2020 10:30

As a background sort of story, I’m a super anxious person, I people please constantly and it is something I’m trying to change in the new year. There was a thread on here a few months ago about times you’ve been too polite to correct someone and therefore ended up with the wrong item (think it was about fish and chips)

Anyway, a month or so ago 2 Jehovah’s witnesses came knocking on my door. I was going out at the time and they could see this, they were really lovely ladies. They said they’ll come back another time and I said yep okay as I was trying to get DD out of the door and all the bags etc

Didn’t think anything of it

Well yesterday I got a knock at the door, it was the two JW. They handed me a leaflet and started explaining it, it was extremely windy and cold and I couldn’t hear what she was saying with the wind so loud. So I said they could come into my hallway. They were there about 10 minutes and I explained I wasn’t religious at all and I wasn’t really interested in learning about it.

They didn’t take no for an answer and started prying as to why I didn’t want to. After a while one of them said they will be in the area on Monday afternoon so will pop back for a longer chat.

I said I’m out Monday and I work 9-5 weekdays so sorry I can’t. She said “well I can come tomorrow evening I suppose! I couldn’t think of an excuse quick enough.

I feel that they wouldn’t take my “not interested” as an answer and I need to be a hell of a lot more assertive. But I really really struggle with this.

My only other option is to go out with DD for the evening (go to my mums or something) but then that’ll only be a temporary fix as they’ll come back another day.

How can I politely buy firmly get them to leave me alone? I have already told them I’m not interested and they are still coming. I feel incredibly uncomfortable at the thought of telling them sternly to leave me alone but I may have to suck it up and do it.

AIBU to just hide if I see them coming?

Anyone have any stories about encounters with JW?

OP posts:
messolini9 · 18/01/2020 19:10

Where did you find JW who are willing to maintain friendships with non-JW?

In my case, right here in the UK, @makingmammaries.
My JW friend has never once preached at me, although she listens very actively if I spout off my views on philiosophy/religion/society, is a career professional & senior exec for a national charity, is psychologically wise, kind to animals & neighbours, & is altogether a lovely woman.

You clearly had a different experience, but PP's claiming that all JW's are hellbent (ha!) on conversion are possibly conflating that with the understandable annoyance of being door-knocked.

messolini9 · 18/01/2020 19:15

By all means say you're gay or a blood donor or whatever

I just don't get it. I genuinely cannot understand how telling a thumping lie is easier than saying "no thank you, I am not interested" & closing your own front door.

tjk10 · 18/01/2020 19:15

The JW are normally little old ladies why do people feel proud to be rude to them? They are not bailiffs just be polite and firm if your not interested.

fridgegrazer · 18/01/2020 19:17

I had a similar problem years ago but with two very polite young men - told them sorry I was cooking, bathing the kids etc, and they said they'd come back. After the third time I realised, like you, that they weren't going to take the hint, so in the end I said

"Look, I know I said I was too busy but the truth is I'm not interested and I was just being polite, so would you mind not calling round again - thanks."

Then anything they say - "Yes I know but I'm not interested/it's not for me thanks" whilst smiling and closing the door.

Seriously though I would be FAR less polite to someone who did this:

So basically they would see me and ... wave me over to the door.

Who do they think they are "waving" you over to your own fucking door?

I also have this sign stuck to my front door - and the only times it hasn't worked have been when I hung my Christmas wreath over it without thinking and when they guy told me he was dyslexic. So if anyone can think of a sign a dyslexic person would understand, would be grateful.

To ‘be out’ when the Jehovah’s witnesses come back
messolini9 · 18/01/2020 19:27

It becomes a sort self righteous duel of twattery.

Grin Grin Grin

Nice one @BobLobLawLLB!

ALongHardWinter · 18/01/2020 19:50

Just don't answer the door! It's not obligatory.

Butterer · 18/01/2020 19:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Justaboy · 18/01/2020 21:50

I had this convo with JW friend a while ago re blood transfusions it went like;

Her: So if i was badly injured and was taken to hospital and they said i needed a blood transfision would you tell them i was a JW?

Me: No.

Her: well I'd never talk to you again if you did that!

Me: see, can't win either way you'd never talk to me again:!

Dead or alive!

Herbalteahippie · 18/01/2020 21:53

Tell them how you just donated blood. And that you are king of the potato people. It works. Also scratch yourself a lot, cough and pretend to offer heroin.

rottiemum88 · 18/01/2020 21:53

Get a big dog. We never get door knockers here Grin

BrickTop999 · 18/01/2020 22:31

I always compliment them on their smart outfits ( they always look so well turned out dont they ?) then say but Im not interested in what they have to say then firmly shut the door

pineing · 18/01/2020 22:37

They come round here occasionally. I just say "We are Methodists so we're not interested, thank you for calling and have a lovely day. Goodbye" and close the door.

We are Methodists (sort of, in passing) but I used to be Anglican and that worked as well, so it doesn't seem to matter all that much what religion you say you are, they do back off and go on their way.

TheFuzzyStar · 18/01/2020 22:39

Tell them you used to be a JW. They won’t come back Grin

Babybel90 · 18/01/2020 22:40

Just don’t answer the door, doesn’t matter if they can see you, just ignore.

Don’t ever give excuses, you don’t owe them anything and they’re the ones not being polite by deliberately ignoring the fact that you’re giving excuses to be polite and save their embarrassment. Excuses just give them something to argue against, just a “no” and uncomfortable silence, make it into a game how long you can leave the uncomfortable silence for, after a couple of times it gets easier.

BluebellsareBlue · 18/01/2020 22:41

I always tell them I'm a practicing catholic, the truth being I'm catholic but not practicing, the soon scarper. Even if you have spoken to them before abd engaged, I'd just say that thanks but you thuht they might have been interested in Catholicism

blacksax · 18/01/2020 22:42

Didn't know who was knocking, I just so happened to randomly open the door to them one day with one of my cats draped about my shoulders. The black one. They went into reverse up the path and said they were sorry for disturbing me. Grin

AnneElliott · 18/01/2020 22:45

I find they do go away when I tell them we are strict Catholics - they want people to indoctrinate. Strict Catholics are already indoctrinated Wink

DesLynamsMoustache · 18/01/2020 22:46

Is OP now a Jehovah's Witness too?

SpeedofaSloth · 18/01/2020 22:51

I always tell them I'm lapsed RC too, but as they once called in on our local presbytery I suspect ours are made of sterner stuff.

Equanimitas · 18/01/2020 22:51

The way my house is, they have to walk past my living room window and you can really see inside from where the front door is. So basically they would see me with DD doing whatever and more than likely wave me over to the door.

Why does that matter? Either ignore them, or open the door, say you're not interested, ask them not to come back, and close the door. Why would you care about these people's opinion of you?

Drogonssmile · 18/01/2020 23:09

We had a group round last week. DH was just taking the kids to the shop so they saw him getting in the car and obviously thought our house was empty so didn't knock. I wouldn't have answered anyway.The best bit was my born again Christian neighbours across the road kept three of them on his doorstep for 45 minutes talking at them!
The rest of the group came back to look for them Grin
They walked away looking like this Confused

AdultHumanFemale · 18/01/2020 23:22

A call to the local Kingdom Hall to ask to be put on a list of addresses not to visit will work.
Polite broken record otherwise; have been using this with JW MiL for 17 years, and born again school mum friend this year. I just say, sincerely, that I am touched by their concern for the wellbeing of my soul, but remain uninterested.

cabbageking · 18/01/2020 23:23

Tell them you only invited them in because it was windy and you were being polite but actually you are not interested.

There is no longer a list of who not to call on re GDPR. So unless the person calling remembers, they will call again once a year until they have contact. So by saying No thank you it says everyone another visit for a while anyway.

Thelnebriati · 18/01/2020 23:27

If you can't say 'no' then stick a blood and organ donor card in the window.

But really, you need to work on learning that 'no' is not a rude word, because inviting people into your home out of 'politeness' is a really bad lesson for your kids.

Splodgetastic · 18/01/2020 23:29

@Butterer, he is a special sort of person - ex-colliery worker who voted Conservative despite what he describes as the coercive control of my mother in the last General Election in a very safe Labour seat. It takes a special kind of intellect to be able to win an argument against him and I really wouldn’t bother - it’s easier just to surrender rather than listen to the hour-long tirade!