To turn down dream house Londoners

[Nochangeplease]

I’m Abu for posting here but need to make a quick decision and although I’m aware strangers on the internet can’t advise I’m interested anyway.
Have the option of moving to a nice place in Sydenham hill. Don’t know the area well or anybody in it but am aware it’s very green and I like that.
But... feels a bit like the middle of nowhere. Nowhere in walking distance. Coming from zone 1 would I be mad to give this area up. Where I am now is great. Kids are settled in their school and wouldn’t want to change.
Anyone have any advice or knowledge of the area?

OP I left London zone 1 (Warwick Avenue) for the green and pleasant Yorkshire dales 3 years ago.

I bitterly regret it. and now I’m priced out.

Don’t do it!

You could ring up the local authority and maybe the surrounding ones to see where they have vacancies.

www.compare-school-performance.service.gov.uk/compare-schools

You can also use that website to compare schools in addition to looking at their Ofsteds.

I’ve looked at some schools and will try and call some but I think it’s dealt with by the local authority and I doubt I’ll get a straight answer. I’ve got less than a week to decide.

The LA should tell you if they have vacancies. Some even publish a list online. It’ll take time to get used to the new location and get settled but I think you’ll find it better in the long run.

Does anybody know what the area is like asbo if there’s teenagers hanging round the streets ect. I know there’s a lot of estates around.
Also, is traffic bad?

You drive in zone one because you cant afford the tube and bus? are you serious its like 1.50 on a bus for a whole route surely petrol dawdling round central london would cost more

If you go out one stop to Penge or to C Palace they both feel less suburban and have high streets and pubs etc. The schools in S Hill are good but it's a long walk to amenities and you are very reliant on the train. You do have the woods though which are fab.

Some good friends of ours live on the estate and I quite frequently walk through it at night with no problems. It seems quiet enough and there's a lot of green space.

(Ps Kingsdale is a lottery system so proximity is no guarantee of a place. Dulwich wood is a lovely primary though).

www.met.police.uk/a/your-area/met/southwark/dulwich-wood/?tab=StatsAndPreventionAdvice

These are the official stats.

@GabsAlot That is not what I said at all. I said if I move to Sydenham I can not afford to pay for myself and 2 kids to travel by train everyday to zone 1 for school and work.

I never said I can’t afford tube and bus in zone 1. I walk everywhere. I use my car at weekends for grocery shopping and running errands and for leaving London or going further out for days out ect

In my experience Lewisham admissions are lovely and try to be as helpful as possible. They should be able to tell you immediately which schools have places. Why not talk to them tomorrow so you have a better understanding of the possibilities?

Yes I will do, thanks.

Just to add, I’m a single parent with a great local support network. Help with kids ect. I know Sydenham isn’t far, but nobody to help with school pick ups at short notice or come and get them if I’m ill or fancy going shopping alone.

Honestly, I would prioritise your different sex kids having their own space over you having yours/a car/an easier commute.

@IndecentFeminist I can’t afford to commute. It would cost an absolute fortune for 3 of us and take over an hour each way. That’s not fair on the kids. As I said my eldest would have to leave before 7am and get home after 6.
The only option would be to find 2 new schools and a new job which I don’t think is what any of us actually want. It’s only the oldest that obviously wants their own room and I think they’d rather wait it out for something local.

Wish I could just pick the house up and move it here

It's definitely worth calling to find out about school places. You could also find out if your DD is eligible for the free education travel pass. As I'm sure you know, bus travel is free for under 16s but if she can't realistically travel by bus to school, she might be eligible for a free travel card to get to school. I'm not sure how that works if you move into a different borough and there are school places available nearer though.

I wouldn’t move. I’ve been sad every time I’ve been back to where we used to live in zone one. Like I’ve been locked out of a life

I wouldn't give up the area you are in now. You would be losing too much from what you say. You should sleep in the lounge for now to give you children their own rooms (or you could share with your teen) and wait for the 3-bed.

absolutely do not move! Can you share with your son instead of your daughter? She needs some privacy. But I would have hated it as a teenager to be yanked from zone 1. Not to mention you have an amazing support network where you are. Sydenham Hill is a long way out of town. It's not really London, in my book. It's the burbs. It's pleasant if that's what you like. But it is not city life.

We moved from zone 1 to Peckham just before kids and it took me 6 years to get over it! And Peckham is central compared to Sydenham Hill.

So,if the area is too much of a move, do the children have the biggest room- could you juggle things so that they do and then work on ways to give them more privacy?

Curtain down the middle of the room/office type dividers between the beds?

My older two had to share for a few weeks while we were mid-relocation, it was hard on everyone and especially difficult around important exams.

Yeah it’s just the pull of the house with a garden but I do think I should wait it out and sort something regarding the current bedroom situation. I’ll be really sad to turn it down though

I completely get it..... but how many years would it be the ‘right’ decision for? If your children are older, then they won’t be interested in the garden so much?

If you all end up trekking back and forth to zone 1, then is it the right decision at all?

We’ve relocated our children 3 times..... it takes 18m-2 years for them to settle fully, and potentially even longer for you, depending. It’s a big decision- Imagine you go the house- how would you feel, then imagine someone said you couldn’t have it due to a mix up- would you be gutted, or secretly pleased?

I am near Sydenham Hill and love the area! It is neighbouring Dulwich Village which is LOVELY. I have never lived on a tube line and never missed it - you just become better at navigating trains and buses.

* I completely get it..... but how many years would it be the ‘right’ decision for? If your children are older, then they won’t be interested in the garden so much?*

I thought about this too. Youngest is 7 so will get some use out of it. But not for too long I’d imagine. I just wish they were a few years younger.
The youngest is very upset at the hypothetical idea of moving school and said they’d rather stay here.
Oldest O biously just wants house and own room but also doesn’t want to leave the area.

* We’ve relocated our children 3 times..... it takes 18m-2 years for them to settle fully, and potentially even longer for you, depending. It’s a big decision- Imagine you go the house- how would you feel, then imagine someone said you couldn’t have it due to a mix up- would you be gutted, or secretly pleased?*

I think I’d be secretly pleased the decision had been taken out of my hands.