Paying adult price for 2 year old

[dancingmonkey]

I am going on a big family holiday with around 15 people and staying in a large house. The person organising it (my mums partner’ has charge me, boyfriend and 2 year old daughter £200 each, and daughter will also have to sleep on a sofa bed! There is also a day trip paid for adult tickets are £26, under 4’s free and yet nothing has been taking off for that.
Is it really worth moany about? Money isn’t a massive issue but it’s the Principle that really annoyed me!

Should I bring it up? Or just leave it

I've got some sympathy with him. Before you know it some people will be complaining that their room was only 15sqm and Sandra and Jim had nearly 20 so they should pay more, Sandra's moaning that their bathroom only had a shower and other people had a bath and Jim didn't have any wine on the Friday night, etc etc

In a family group I totally wouldn't expect my siblings with small children to be paying the same as me. I would be horrified if I found out my sister was paying the same for her 2 year old as I was paying for my 19 year old (for example).

I'd probably overlook the room cost for the sake of harmony and I guess your DD will still be taking up a sleeping space in the house, and eating / drinking and it's a bit complicated to work it out exactly fairly as then you get into debates about "person x should pay more as they have a bigger room" and "I should pay less as I don't have a en-suite" and it goes on and on.

I would however question her being charged for the day trip when it's free for her to have entry.

We usually do half the money for small children.

I am always surprised by people who agree as a group that you don’t contribute anything at all for children - we have four and would never be comfortable with someone else paying for their food, someone else might have one or two which isn’t so costly to absorb, but where do you draw the line? I can confirm that our food shopping costs a lot more now than it did before we had children. Difficult situation really - recalculation may not make much difference to you as a family but as someone else said this will set a precedent for any future trips and any future children - try to keep it casual, you could sincerely just say well shall we just do half cost for the kids since they’ll barely eat anything compared to the adults? Hope it all works out.

I am amazed at those who think anyone under 18 should not be paid for. I rarely drink alcohol, and teenagers eat way more than me.
I think children free only works if everyone has kids and about the same amount.
When I have organised big groups away, kids pay same as adults if they are having a bed, but free for accommodation if they co sleep. Rooms large enough for a sofa bed will be the nicest or one of the nicer rooms there anyway.

@Clymene Your 19 year old is an adult, not a child.

Also those saying children should only pay if they have a room of their own - a lot of the adults don't have a room of their own. I would prefer to have 2 bedrooms for DP and I and 2 other bedrooms for our kids. I would expect to pay a lot more for that. In reality, people generally share rooms.

Don’t do it, OP, they’re subsiding the adults at your expense.

Please get your assertiveness on.

*subsidising

We used to go on big family holidays and the cost of the holiday was split up by the number of over 16s. As soon as you hit 16 you became liable for a 'share' of the cost despite still sharing a room with cousins. Same with food kitty. Looking back seems a bit unfair to those without children but it just worked for us.

We sometimes go on group holidays with friends and the children up to a certain age pay half for the food if it's communal food in a villa. The accommodation depends on how it's charged by the owner. We've just been away somewhere which had a per night cost for adults and a different rate for children so everyone paid that amount. Other times, children have been half price. For the food the half price thing wears off by the time they are secondary school age-ish but does depend how old the others are so it's a fairish balance rather than an exact science though.

Yes I'm aware of that Karen. Which is precisely my point!

@nwatty Yes very unfair on those without kids. They are subsidising families.
Of course tiny children don't eat what adults eat. So charging them the same as adults is not okay. But I do think a good rule of thumb is what you would pay if you were organising this as a household alone. So in a hotel room you don't pay more for a cot. Under 5's usually eat free, and children young enough to eat children's portions pay about half price. But older kids eat as much or more than adults and cost just as much.

I certainly wouldn't be paying anything for a 2 year old. Book through any holiday website and they're generally free - even if the company has to provide a little roll out bed or a cot for them.

Can you bring a travel cot for your toddler so she's not taking up one of the beds? Or buy a toddler airbed - they're only about £30.

There's no way I'd accept paying that - TBF I'd question charging for anyone under 12yrs.

Would you be happy paying £600 if it was just the 3 of you? In all honesty if it was my family we would be adding up the cost and splitting the total by family because thats what we do regardless of how many kids we each had. It all balances out over time.

@lola That kind of view is why I stopped organising big group holidays. It is so not worth the hassle. There are always parents who want their kids to have their own room, but not pay for it. Or want the largest room with a sofa bed in it, but don't want to pay for it. IME they also tend to have kids who eat a lot. I remember one family like this with an 11-year old boy who paid nothing and ate way more than me or most women there. It does cause resentment if you are subsidising friends, And in general people who think it is fine for others to subsidise them, tend to be takers in other ways anyway.

I dont think children would be charged £200 anyway.

@sweeneytoddsrazor It honestly depends on whether it balances up over time. If someone does not have kids, and someone else has 4 kids, it is never going to balance up.
If it is all families with a couple of kids and the only real difference is ages, then yes it does balance up over time.
But honestly OP organising large group holidays is a fucking nightmare. I did it 5 times in all, and would never do it again. Small groups tend to be fine, but in groups as large as 15 people, there will be very different views about what is okay.

Why don’t you suggest you buy all your DCs food at £100 to “save him the worry about her dietary requirements” then take off the £26 for the ticket and just send him £74 to cover it?!

@Karen I usually stay well clear of big group holidays! Or suggest that we'll get the apartment down the road, much easier

@LolaLollypop No problem then, you are paying for your kids then.

I think they should have split the accommodation and food cost per person including kids, but then added the day trip price per adult on top.

So you would have had a small reduction for your 2 year old, but not a major one.

@karencantobe Well I wouldn't be paying anything extra to have my toddler there as under 5's are free on most holiday bookings.

I don't think anyone minds paying what's fair though (or they shouldn't anyway). The original question was should OP pay the same for a 2 year old as a grown adult.

Given the toddler is on a special diet so wouldn't eat much of the food (most toddlers dont anyway) and would get free entry to the activities - the only issue for me would be the bed. Under 5's generally go in a travel cot/roll out bed in their parents room so there is no extra cost. If all the above apply then yes, I think the child should be "free".

We do annual family holidays, kids pay 50%. So if it's £100 an adult, you'd 'charge' the child £50.