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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Colleague emailed teacher about me

128 replies

Sugarcainx · 14/01/2020 18:30

I started in a new school last Monday on long-term cover. As i'm new and the students don't know me, some of them are of course trying it on, but i'm following the behaviour policy and the vast majority of students are completing the work every lesson. There is low-level disruption but i'm working on it as best as I can.
Today I had year 8 and a TA was in my room supporting (seems to be at random, some lessons I have one, some I have nobody)

They were chatty and could have been quieter, I had to tell them to stop a few times, but bar 2 students they all completed the work, and those 2 came back at lunch.
20 minutes after the lesson ended, I had an email from the teacher I am covering. She said that the TA had emailed her saying this class were not very well behaved today and not in their seating plan. She was nice about it, but I don't really understand the TA.

She must have rushed after the lesson to email this teacher given the speed of it. This TA didn't say a word to me about anything, and I really don't think it was her place to do that.
She knows I am new, and the students pretty much all did the work. I just found it a bit odd,unless she was saying it more against the class as opposed to me.
What would you think of this ? I really can't be doing with bitchy colleagues, I left a school at Christmas because of a manager like that !

OP posts:

Original poster

Sugarcainx · 14/01/2020 19:10

That is true, she may have emailed the TA herself. If that's the case I wouldn't have a problem, but i'm not sure.
I think I will let this slide but be on my guard. I find it hard enough trusting people as it is, especially colleagues as you never know what people can do or say.

OP posts:

Original poster

Sugarcainx · 14/01/2020 19:11

I'd like to think there is an element of niceness istead about it but i'm not sure. I won't say anything to/about the TA and i've informed the teacher that the work was completed but I will watch my back.

OP posts:

Angelil · 14/01/2020 19:12

I'm about to leave a school in part because of this type of vindictive, underhand behaviour.

Original poster

Sugarcainx · 14/01/2020 19:13

That's such a shame, sorry to hear that but sounds like the right choice. What did they do ?
One day i'll fulfill my dream of working for myself and by myself :)

OP posts:

itsgettingweird · 14/01/2020 19:13

I'd have emailed teacher something like

"There's a seating plan? I wasn't aware of that and it would have been good to know and even more helpful if the TA had mentioned it to me rather than emailing you. Sorry you were disturbed whilst off sick - I know that shouldn't happen. Some pupils are testing the boundaries as you'd expect but I'm dealing with it effectively via the schools behaviour policy. Thank you for your concern."

I'd also copy in the HOD or someone. The Ta needs to know she isn't a teacher and the role to to assist teachers! And I say that as someone working as an HLTA.

Karenisbaren · 14/01/2020 19:15

sometimes the staff in schools can be worst than the kids xx

Original poster

Sugarcainx · 14/01/2020 19:15

That's a good suggestion. Exactly, I really don't get why the TA didn't just come and say it quietly to me rather than running to email the teacher ? So weird !

OP posts:

LonginesPrime · 14/01/2020 19:16

She said that the TA had emailed her saying this class were not very well behaved today and not in their seating plan.

Regardless of the TA's behaviour (which sounds petty at best), I think the teacher was in the wrong to mention this.

It's one thing saying 'was everything ok with that class? They can be a bit of a handful' but to say that she knows they weren't well behaved and weren't in their seating plan because she's got eyes on you doesn't sound supportive or helpful at all - yes, it's not ideal that their regular teacher is away but that's not your bloody fault is it?

I would try to be assertive in your responses to both of them and react to their comments as if they were intended to be helpful (even though the teacher sounds like she's revelling in the class being misbehaved in her absence).

Also, if the TA knew they weren't in their seating plan, she should have told you when they sat down, not stored it up as something to report back later!

Effiedg · 14/01/2020 19:19

You must have a line manager in school. Report directly to them and cut the teacher out. She is not in school and should not be directing things from home.

ThebishopofBanterbury · 14/01/2020 19:21

Highly unprofessional of the TA to do this without discussing the issue with you first.

toomanyleggings · 14/01/2020 19:21

I've had this happen to me except I was supply and I'd observed the usual teacher with the class prior to me taking over and they were actually better for me than I'd seen them with their normal teacher. Didn't stop the TA running off and raiding it with the head of year and head of dept. The group was disbanded after one lesson. I think the TA actually didn't want to support that particular group but some of the are just looking to put the boot in on new staff

Foldinthecheese · 14/01/2020 19:28

I would speak to your head of department. It is very much their job to have a quiet word with all involved and let them know that these kinds of actions aren’t appropriate. They should be supporting you and helping you to settle in, and I’m sure would prefer to know if you’re feeling undermined by other members of staff.

Original poster

Sugarcainx · 14/01/2020 19:30

Thanks for the advice, I can see this happening again sadly.
Why can't I just work from home and not have to have any interaction with others 😂
I don't think the TA was fair to judge the lesson like that. It's her word against mine without the usual teacher being there to see how it was.

OP posts:

cabbageking · 14/01/2020 19:32

You are a team in class, there to help and support each other using different skills and knowledge.

If she had something to help you then she should have provided it.
If she saw there was an issue she could have offered advice or options.
If she didn't have the skills to help or offer advice then I would questions if she was the appropriate person to be with you.

I think you stand your ground and speak to the Head or HOD about confidentiality.

astuz · 14/01/2020 19:33

I had this when I first started at my current school. Most of the TAs are lovely, but a couple of them sent emails to the SENCo or the class teacher if I was covering, basically questioning my behaviour management. It's really annoying, I don't know why some TAs do this. Behaviour management is always a nightmare when you're new to a school. New teachers to a school (experienced or not), just need lots of support and back up with behaviour management, not having someone "telling on" them!

I found the problem dissolved away, just by standing my ground and making it quite clear that I was in charge eg. directing the TA as soon as they came in as to who they would work with, where they would sit etc. I could only do this once I'd had the class a few times though.

I very much stood my ground with the SENCo/class teachers as well, explained the situation and said that I needed support, not being made to feel like I was being checked up on. They got the message, and I've not had trouble since about October half-term.

Disquieted1 · 14/01/2020 19:36

This kind of underhand sniping is endemic nowadays, with complaints and accusations being thrown around like confetti.
Nasty, snide, small people with nothing better to do than take offence - that's the modern workplace.
Thank God for self-employment!

Cherrysoup · 14/01/2020 19:37

Highly inappropriate of her to contact the teacher who’s off. I’d be pissed off if my ta did that. It would be better if she told you some ways of preventing the disruption or helped in class. It totally undermines you. If you’re feeling brave, the best option is to speak to her direct, otherwise find her line manager and ask her to speak her. Either way, she needs telling she did the wrong thing.

Original poster

Sugarcainx · 14/01/2020 19:38

I'm so glad to hear that things got better for you, and well done on standing up for yourself.
I agree, i've hardly seen any teacher at all who can come in on their first day and have excellent behaviour management. If they do, i'd love to know their secret !
I think a small number of TAs resent the fact that they aren't the teacher because they don't have the qualifications or such.
I hope it won't happen again. I need to be less sensitive, I'm going to have to work with difficult people throughout my career, I wish I had a thicker skin.

OP posts:

NarwhalsNarwhals · 14/01/2020 19:39

If she has gone telling tales that's horrible but before you speak to her, it might be that the teacher asked her and she's made a comment like "oh they were a bit chatty" I have worked with a couple of teachers who will text and check up when they are off.

TheYearOfTheDog · 14/01/2020 19:43

Nothing to do with age. I agree she overstepped, and made herself look bad!! But this not age related. Please dont be ageist. As i am nearly 50, i really notice that any foot a woman my age puts wrong is instantly attributed to her age! Or the age gap between her and a colleague. I have grown more professional as I have got older. This is no comment on younger colleagues but personally, im more emotionally resilient, more professional, less threatened as i get older.

NewYearsRevolution2020 · 14/01/2020 19:47

There's quite a lot in here that's wrong.

I really think we need new guidelines on supply/TA boundaries. The good TAs are worth their weight but are unfortunately tainted by the bad ones who can do so much damage. I spent my whole time undoing some of the bad practice our phonics teacher did to the children (shattering their confidence in the process). She then goes into dinner lady mode (her other job). Completely inappropriate rushing 4 yr olds.

I left because of it. Why isn't more being done? Money?

OP, I have no advice.

managedmis · 14/01/2020 19:51

I don't think the TA was fair to judge the lesson like that.

She's not in a position to judge anything. She's the assistant.

I'd copy her in on all future correspondence : kids behaved, TA looked out of the window, etc

Play her at her own game

WhatsTheLatest · 14/01/2020 19:52

From a different POV, I have done similar when I have been in a class and the pupils have been out of their places and disrespectful to the cover teacher, or even when the normal teacher cant control them. The head of subject or HOY has to know. I have done it from the viewpoint that when the teacher comes back I want them to give the class what for for behaving in that way.
It may well be no disrespect to you at all, but trying to support you by telling the usual teacher you were trying your best but X and Y need a talking to by them when they get back

Original poster

Sugarcainx · 14/01/2020 19:55

That's fair enough, and I do get what youre saying, I just don't get why she didn't say a word to me re the seats or anything else. I'm employed by the school, i'm not intending to speak to anyone about this, Ive just confirmed to the teacher that the work was completed.

OP posts:

Michaelbaubles · 14/01/2020 19:58

The appropriate time to feed back to the teacher is when they return, not when they’re not in school. It’s fine for a TA to have a quick word just before the teacher goes into their first lesson back to talk about misbehaviour etc, but in this circumstance where the cover teacher could possibly be having the class for a while, the class teacher isn’t supposed to be involved and their involvement can only make things worse for everyone.

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