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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that the motive on gift wrapping paper does not matter?

343 replies

Luxplus · 12/01/2020 15:38

Dd, 3 years old, was invited to a birthday party by a girl from nusery. All fine, responded she would like to come, asked for wishes and went with dd to get a gift from list. Thought I had frozen gift wrapping paper at home. Wanted to wrap this morning before party at 10am to realise that the only wrapping paper we had was Christmas inspired green with gold trees on so ofc wrapped the gift in that paper and took dd to party..
All went fine at the party, the birthday gift liked the gift and party was nice.
But just received a txt from the birthday girls mom where she is moaning about the paper and accusing me of regifting a Christmas gift that I clearly didn't even bother to rewrap.
I'm a bit gobsmacked by the txt.. I have a recipe that proves I bought it last weekend, but I really didnt anybody would care that much about the look of the wrapping paper?
AIBU?

OP posts:
Aragog · 13/01/2020 08:08

Thankfully I now only wrap with brown paper and string! Can't be accused of being the 'wrong' wrapping paper I guess at least.

If it happens again turn the paper inside out and have the plain white side facing out - surely they can't complain then?!

Mum is obviously appallingly rude. Sadly this kind of behaviour is going to end up costing her child friends.

MegaClutterSlut · 13/01/2020 08:10

Why are so many being precious about wrapping paper Hmm its just paper...... I would find it funny. I certainly wouldn't text you like the mum did. Rude AF

Wheresthesandman · 13/01/2020 08:23

“Thank you for the invite, X had a lovely time. The gift was bought last weekend and was one of the items on your gift list. I’m also not sure how I would have been able to regift a Christmas present without opening it first? I did apologise to your husband about the Christmas wrapping paper, and he was very nice about it, so I’m surprised it’s such an issue. If you don’t want Y to have the gift then by all means return it to me or donate it to charity.”

She’s being hideously rude and ungrateful, there’s no way I’d be humouring that by offering her the receipt for an exchange or to prove you’ve recently bought it. As long as it’s something appropriate for the child why would it matter if you had regifted it!

Decidewhattobeandgobeit · 13/01/2020 08:39

If make a jokey comment to my DH about someone using Xmas paper but I’d never say it to the person who gave the gift! The mother is clearly insane.

Appletreehouse · 13/01/2020 08:46

Fine for a 3 year who is only just starting to understand birthdays and will only care about the gift. Maybe not for older child who may feel like their birthday melds into Christmas at this time of year. Mother CF, even if it had been a regift, a present is a nice gesture no matter where it comes from, so long as it's suitable for the age etc. Don't message her back, ignore

Teensruletheroost · 13/01/2020 08:46

Why are so many being precious about wrapping paper hmm its just paper

I think it is because people with birthdays around Christmas often have birthdays forgotten or overlooked or doubled up with Christmas. I don’t think it is about wrapping paper itself but about the birthday not being special enough to merit the effort that a summer birthday would.

I hope I have explained that (and I don’t even have a Xmas birthday!) but i think it is cumulative effect of just another little thing that makes people not feel special on their special day.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 13/01/2020 08:47

You gave her child a present they wanted and she is whinging about the paper.

As for her text to the other parent Shock

She isn’t going to have many friends at the school gate.

LaurieMarlow · 13/01/2020 09:03

I’ve never come across a 3 year old who would even register the design of the paper.

What a prize dick the mother is. Just looking for things to get annoyed about.

I’d just say she’s welcome to return the gift if it isn’t good enough.

CornishMaid1 · 13/01/2020 09:05

I can't believe she has gotten worked up over the wrapping paper! We have birthdays around Christmas in our family and I wrap the presents in whatever paper I find - I do try to keep some generic paper in but if I have run out they always get Christmas wrapping paper. No-one has complained yet as they are grateful for the present and the paper just goes straight in the recycling.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 13/01/2020 09:11

Well the text is clearly rude but my birthday is this time of year and it is annoying to have Christmas wrap on birthday presents. I always have a a roll or two of birthday wrap at home to use for any kids presents.

bongsuhan · 13/01/2020 09:12

Since this is all taking place in Denmark (assuming OP is not Danish herself) have you considered that social norms and expectations concerning

  • gifts
-wrapping -communicating dissatisfaction

may be quite different in Denmark when condeming the (presumably Danish) mother as cheeky, rude etc.?

Yeahnah2020 · 13/01/2020 09:14

The mum was a CF but you were lazy for wrapping a birthday present in Christmas wrap.

MarshallPNutt · 13/01/2020 09:17

I can't believe there are people who would actually be offended by this.

Me neither. I am now firmly of the blief that (some) people are actively wanting to be offended and just on the look out for something to be offended by.

Seeline · 13/01/2020 09:18

I would have told her that my DD had chosen the paper to wrap the gift.

But from your later posts, she sounds a complete CF - asking where the rest of the money was?!!

SallyWD · 13/01/2020 09:19

I think the mother was rude and I'm very surprised at her behaviour. However, I would have made an effort to get birthday paper and if I couldn't I would have mentioned it when I gave the gift e.g. "Sorry about the paper. I didn't have time to get to the shops".

EnidBlyton · 13/01/2020 09:26

how rude,
so what if it was a regift?
which it wasnt
appalling behaviour.
i would not respond

AJPTaylor · 13/01/2020 09:29

She has identified herself as an arse.
Fwiw. My 3 daughters have had an average number of parties. If I noticed Xmas paper I would have thought " that's exactly the sort of thing I would do."
We have had expensive gifts and boxes of Maltesers. It's not what the party is about.
Cut her out.

JassyRadlett · 13/01/2020 09:31

I can't believe there are people who would actually be offended by this.

Has anyone on the thread claimed to be offended? Irritated, irked, unsurprised and resigned to the fact that January birthdays are a massive fucking inconvenience and pretending otherwise is a total drag, sure.

Offended? Nah.

Justgivemesomepeace · 13/01/2020 09:32

Some people must have nothing going on in their lives. Either that or just want a fight.
Its my sons birthday today. He got gifts from both grandparents in xmas paper. Hes 7 and i dont think he noticed, he certainly didnt mention it. I just had a chuckle at the thought of my old dad rooting about for paper and using anything. Who cares?
That mum is unbelievably rude. Now thats something I get annoyed about, not paper. If i was that other mum Id be bloody fuming.

FrowningFlamingo · 13/01/2020 09:37

I wouldn’t wrap a birthday present in Christmas paper, especially for a January birthday and especially for a child.
But she was unreasonable to text you about it.

speakball · 13/01/2020 09:37

That's not normal. Normal person wouldn't text you about that. I wouldn't be stressing about it when she's obviously not your average person with average worries.

Frenchw1fe · 13/01/2020 09:37

I think it's sad that this child will end up with no friends at her next party because the dm will have alienated all the parents.

MelroseHigginbottom · 13/01/2020 09:38

Take the gift back and stuff the receipt up her ungrateful... nose

Forcryingoutloudwtf · 13/01/2020 09:38

I cannot believe somebody sent you a text complaining about the party present you gave their child. They is the height of rudeness. No matter what the present is you say thank you in this situation. They invited your child thus making it necessary for you to provide a present. Even if it was shit they should have said thanks. Pointing out the wrapping paper isn't good enough for them shows such a lack of manners. Totally ignore them or text back 'you are welcome.'

Sockymonster · 13/01/2020 09:38

Birthday girls mum is horribly rude. Genuinely cannot imagine the thought process behind sensing a text like that.i would send a snarky text back. I couldn't give a hoot what the present was wrapped in so I'd imagine a 3 year cares even less. You put time,money and effort into purchasing a gift ,only to get a text like that in return?Send her a picture of the receipt and tell her to get a life.