Regarding fully reclined seat at mealtime on a flight?

[Linguaphile]

What exactly is seat reclining etiquette on long haul flights? I was on a long haul flight last weekend (on the way home from visiting my parents for Christmas), and just as meals and drinks had been handed out, the woman in front of me abruptly fully reclined her seat and decided to sleep, nearly spilling my meal and drinks into my lap in the process. I had to sit like a pretzel during the entire meal with her chair digging into my knees and my tray shoved right up next to my body about an inch below my boobs, awkwardly trying to cut up food without elbowing the person next to me in the face. It wasn’t late at night, maybe 7pm. She stayed that way for the remainder of the flight, even after she had been told to put her seat upright for landing 7 hours later.

Now, I realise that some discomfort is to be expected in steerage class on flights, and I understand someone wanting to recline a bit to sleep once food has been cleared away and cabin lights are down (though even then I try not to recline all the way as I know how uncomfortable it is for the person behind me). But casually shoving your seat all the way down right at meal time when space is obviously already tight just felt... well... rude.

AIBU to have been irked?

I did get in one swift kick to the back of her seat just after we landed, and she immediately put the seat up

She shouldn't have had it reclined during landing (and take off). It is a safety regulation. A reclines seat would prevent the person behind being able to properly adopt the brace position in an emergency.

On a long haul flight recently the people in front all reclined as far as they could go so when the food was delivered we asked the attendant to tell them to put their seats forward, which they did. no aggro. The difference is they wanted to eat too and complied. If they'd refused I'm not sure what would have happened.

It's worth trying to book that seat at the back with some space behind it so you can recline as far as you want. Unfortunately, it's also where the toilet queue and leg stretchers gather. Cattle class!

reclined seat

Which airline was it? I am amazed the flight attendant didn't just say all seats upright during food. I think you were daft not to ask her to move it though, I mean there's being timid and then there's being unable to have a normal conversation! Use your words (hate that saying but seems apt here)

I would have asked her politely to put her seat up until the meal was over and if she wouldn't I would have called a flight attendant and complained.

The flight attendant should have noticed that her seat was reclined for the landing and insisted on her putting it up. I'd have called a flight attendant as soon as it became clear she wasn't going to do this for the landing as it's very dangerous. You wouldn't have been able to adopt the brace position should anything have happened.

It may depend on the airline, but it is still the case in my very recent experience.

It bloody well should be!

Mind you, I'd arm the cabin crew with electrified cattle prods as a matter of course and invite them to make liberal use of the contraptions.

It is rude not to recline your seat during a meal and usually a flight attendant will ask people to stop doing this.

Anyone reclining in front of me on a short haul flight gets continually kicked in the back though - no mercy.
This however is totally unacceptable and abusive behavior that I would definitely complain about.
You have no idea about the issues the person in front of you may have, or how long they may have been traveling.
They are perfectly entitled to recline their seat, no one is entitled to continuously kick someone in the back?

The etiquette is really about just being a decent human, which means thinking about how your actions affect those around you.

I would have asked her politely and if she didn't then put her seat upright would have asked a flight attendant to speak to her.

Darn, I need an edit button. Rude to recline your seat!

Or put an override button in the galley so the cabin crew can return all seats to upright at mealtimes/landing, whether passengers like it or not.

I hate this.
Last time I flew long haul I had two seat recliners on both journeys. The outward journey was by far the worse. Guy came in, sat in front and fully reclined even before the safety demonstration. Cabin crew told him off. He put it up for take off and it was straight back down. He had to to be told to put it up for meal times by cabin crew which he did to huffing and puffing.

Some people are dicks.

Airlines won't use a sliding system because that requires a larger footprint per seat - you would have to allocate enough space to a single person to do this, or raise the seats to allow enough space under then to allow this. Reclining bac seats allow to the essentially stack passangers on top of each other.

Anyway, YANBU to expect seats up until meals have all been cleared away. After that, it's ok for peope to use their recline, imo.

Last time I flew British Airways economy long haul I asked the flight attendant to sort. She (the FA) rolled her eyes, like it was a big fucking chore, but did ask, and the passenger did oblige.

Sounds hellish but next time, ask them to put the seat up for meals. We had someone recline their chair before takeoff - they were asked to put it up which they did, but they fidgeted and thrashed around for 7hrs , making noise and being generally irritating. I was glad to get off.

I want to fly with whichever airline you flew with if the seats recline far back enough that they make a discernible difference. Have personally never found it a problem eating with the seat in front reclined.

Why couldn’t you just say something? I’m sure she just wasn’t thinking and if you’d asked her to put the seat back up for duration of mealtime she’d have done so.

I've done a fair number of long-haul flights, and regular travellers know that if the cabin lights are off, then it's fair game to recline. Upright at meal times. If lights are on, it's daytime and it's not a meal time, then you're in a grey area - many people try to deal with their jet lag by sleeping as much as they can in flight. General etiquette is that reclining is ok if you are not being inconsiderate (e.g. on an aisle seat blocking access for people sitting next to you). As in most things, work towards "Don't Be a Knob" and you'll be ok. I've been fast on asleep on long-haul flights and woken up by cabin crew who asked me to sit up as they were about to do a meal service. No problem with that.

Short-haul flights (eg most flights in Europe) - no need to recline at all, any time of day or night.

I have arthritis in my hips and knees so can’t sit upright for any length of time, therefore would always recline my seat. If someone asked me to put my seat up at mealtimes I would, no problem.

I'm not bothered about seat in front being reclined while I eat or anything like that. But if it was pushed back WHILE your food is on the tray and therefore spilled your food and drink, then yes, that's very annoying. Annoying enough to still be thinking about a week later and making threads on the internet about? That's OTT for me to be honest.

This happened to me and one of the stewards came over to me, rolled her eyes and said quite loudly 'I know, it is very selfish isn't is, but unfortunately we can't ask people not to do it' then winked, and walked away.

The twat in front put his seat back up quicksmart

YANBU to find this appalling behaviour.

YABU not to have spoken to an attendant (that's their job!) as they soon would have told her to raise it until meals were finished and YABVU not to have called for an attendant when she refused to raise it on landing. It's dangerous.

@midwest - I guess the tongue-in-cheek nature of my comment escaped you. Of course I wouldn't advocate continually kicking someone throughout a flight.

They absolutely shouldn’t have it reclined during a meal. I’m also surprised she wasn’t told not to by an attendant, but if not you should have called them over. This person was very selfish indeed.

However also this:

Anyone reclining in front of me on a short haul flight gets continually kicked in the back though - no mercy.
This however is totally unacceptable and abusive behavior that I would definitely complain about.
You have no idea about the issues the person in front of you may have, or how long they may have been traveling.
They are perfectly entitled to recline their seat, no one is entitled to continuously kick someone in the back?

You can’t just kick someone. You can ask them, you can ask a flight attendant to ask them, but if it’s entitled to be down then they can keep it down!

I would have said something - she perhaps didn't;t realise and if asked she might have been happy to have her seat upright for the length of time it took for you to eat your meal.

However, if she was just being a twat, and refused, I would have made sure I "accidentally" spilled something over her (not anyone's fault - there's just no room to manoeuvre . . . )

I flew from Portugal to UK (so short haul) when dd was a baby and she was on my lap. Suddenly the seat in front flew back and hit dd and we were quite squashed.

I politely asked the woman if she could put her seat upright as I had a baby on my lap. Big mistake. She got up and absolutely went for me, screaming that I was a selfish breeder and she had the right to do what she liked. I was quite scared and her friend had to pull her away. I told the flight attendant but she seemed a bit wary of her too and just asked her not to speak to me again.

I always ask the cabin crew to tell person with reclined seat to move it back for meal times - they always oblige