To feel embarassed/ashamed of what I do for a living?

[Exvagabond]

I'm currently working as a cleaner at £10/hour with an agency in London. I've never cleaned professionally until a few months ago, but I was desperate to find work to support my family.

Whenever someone asks me what I'm doing, I tell them and you can just tell by the look on their face that they don't approve almost as if they feel sorry for me. Why does my job make people uncomfortable?

I dont have to work, my partner supports me but I see it like this;

-My DD (4) gets 30 hours at nursery, socialising with other children and learning what I don't have the time to teach her at home

• I'm bringing money in to the household so that we can put money away for emergencies, a holiday, days out etc.

• I'm putting money in to a private pension

• I'm paying tax

• On top of this I'm a part time student, so I won't do this forever

Why am I scum to some people?

I have experienced exactly the same thing, many people really look down their noses at cleaning for a living. I never felt inadequate for being a cleaner, in my view it is a perfectly acceptable job to do and an honest way to make a living.
Don’t let anyone else put you off.

Haven't read the whole thread so forgive me if someone else has mentioned this but have you heard of Anna Netrebko, the opera singer? As a student she cleaned at the opera house for her living and, when she finally walked in to audition, one of the big wigs recognized the girl who used to sweep the floors. She went on to become a star.

You shouldn't feel embarrassed, there's nothing wrong with cleaning. My mum did it in the evenings when I was little. Anyone who looks down their nose is being a snob.

TBH, I don't really understand why you're working if you don't need to be. Especially as you have a child and you're a student and cleaning isn't the most exciting of jobs. But to each, their own.

You're working and supporting your family. You have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about. If people judge you, it says more about them than you. Hold your head up high and be proud

I think you're making assumptions OP, perhaps based on your own feelings about being a cleaner. No one has called you scum...you have decided that based on a look...

I don't know a single person who would look down on a cleaner. I can't imagine anyone actually cares very much. A job is a job...

Cleaner here. I knew what job you did just by reading the title. I have felt and do feel the same as you op. I have had a range of comments said to my face by numerous people. From the "oh your just a cleaner" , or " your job is the lowest of the low". And "God, you must be starving to do that".

On one occasion, a retail worker carried a heavy item out to my car. When he saw all my cleaning stuff, he commented how much there was. I told him I was a self employed domestic cleaner. He looked me up and down with sheer disgust and walked backwards away from me.

I think unless you have been a cleaner, you will not have an understanding of how people treat you.

I don't know a single person who would look down on a cleaner.

Then you’ve clearly never been to the Home Counties

Source - grew up there. Snobbery abounds.

Another cleaner here! 🙋🏼‍♀️
I LOVE my job and I proudly tell people what I do. I don't care what they think.
My partner works, my 5 kids are all in full time school and I just can't sit at home. I applied for any and every job I could. I admit that I wasn't looking for just cleaning jobs but I'm so glad I got this job. I love going to my clients houses and making their day easier.
I don't think I should be ashamed of my job.
I work for a company and I love picking up my rota every Friday to find out who I'm going to the next week.
I've mainly worked in retail all my life but this is by far the best job I've had!

Hi Op,
I left my job as an IT support engineer when I got pregnant as the job involved a lot of lifting etc and it was a high risk pregnancy when she was 6 months I Started evening cleaning and I am still doing it now she is 2 I do it to help my family and to be there for my daughter as at the moment no free nursery but I pay for her to go 2 mornings a week to socialise. Never be ashamed you should be proud of yourself

I live in a home county

peoplepleaser yes I've had a few friends and family tell me "you can do better than that" about my cleaning job! The truth is, it suits me, is stress free and is actually quite good money.

I have met some cleaners that have grown quite bitter about their jobs, particularly when cleaning for very wealthy families with huge beautiful houses.
You really need to avoid thinking that you as a cleaner are beneath others or start to feel shame about that. That's just a really negative mindset Op.

I think you are maybe being U to be feel embarrassed/ashamed of what you do.

When someone is cleaning unsupervised (and in my experience you often are) she or he, but I think mostly she? is being trusted not to talk about what she sees in the house or office she's cleaning, not to cop off and sit around or to leave early, and not to steal from a place which is left open to her. Even trusted not to judge the people whose house or office it is.

Anyone who is worthy of being accorded that level of trust deserves to be looked up to, not down at!

Don’t be daft. When my marriage ended and I had three kids to support, I did cleaning, ironing, worked in cafes, a butchers shop. Loads of different things, some of them okay, some completely rubbish, because it worked out best financially/in terms of childcare at the time. I have a degree and a post graduate qualification but couldn’t get a job in my previous field as I had moved countries post separation and my experience wasn’t recognised in the UK.

My life has changed immeasurably now for many reasons. Your job doesn’t define you. Be proud you are taking responsibility and providing for your children 🌸

This thread has made me sad. I have a cleaner who i cherish. Health reasons make it impossible to clean my home myself. If it wasn't for my cleaner, I would be in a pretty bad situation, and a lot less happy.

Rather than looking down on her, I respect her for doing everything she can to keep her home together, and I am envious of her for being able to do things I can no longer do.

Doing a honest days work is nothing to be embarrassed about.

My cleaner (had one when my DC were small) helped me not only keep my house clean, she helped me keep my sanity. She took a load off my mind about managing housework, she gave me extra time with my children and husband, and she made me smile every Tuesday when I came home from work to a sparkling house.

I'd say that's a job worth doing and worth a good deal of respect.

Nothing wrong in being a cleaner. Don't be ashamed.

Your job doesn’t define you.

Totally agree, there's nothing sadder than people who define themselves by what they do to buy stuff
They aren't people in their own right, just a role.
You are doing fine OP, and if you don't define yourself as a cleaner you probably have lots to talk about.

Absolutely something to be proud of. Honest working to support your family. No shame at all.

One of my family cleaned student halls, including the lavatories, often disgusting, to help pay for her master’s, at the same university. Not only do we not regard her as scum, we are incredibly proud of her, she is amazing, dedicated and got an excellent degree at a top university. You should be so proud of what you are doing.

It's honest work and you are doing it for the right reasons. I've known people who cleaned for a living, they were independent and proud. There are some very posh cleaners around too.

Pay no attention to people who look aghast at you for doing domestic work, you'll be better off than them in the long run - and it's your money!
You won't be doing it forever but at the moment it suits you and your family.

I think you are to be congratulated.

My cleaner doesn’t clean her own house -she has a cleaner :)

You are working so financially providing for you and your child and modelling a work ethic which is a great example for children to see.

I am a midwife, but I often clean as part of my job. I don't believe the domestic staff should come into a room to find bodily fluids everywhere, so in essence I 'clean for the cleaner' I always empty the bins and strip the bedding too. I don't see cleaning as below me, not in the slightest. Why would anyone?? I have massive respect for anyone that earns an honest wage. The only person I would raise an eyebrow at is the poster who suggested you shouldn't work at all because you have a child and a partner who can support you...........