What do I do

[fmylife]

Name change, occasional poster.

My ex has our 3 dc tonight, they are due back at 10am.
He is now threatening to take them out of the country. He has the means, he has a very dark side to him. I was emotionally, financially and physically abused for the past 15 years.

I don't know what to do, he is on the BC, so don't know how I can stop him.
DC are 10,8 and 2.

I hope everything is ok OP. I’d second what others have said - order passports (if he hasn’t already) and go to a solicitors tomorrow to formalise a contact agreement. I’d go as far as to say no contact until proper agreement is in place.

How can you get passports without him knowing? Is he a different nationality?

Have you heard from them yet?

Only one parent needs to sign the passport forms as long as they are on BC.

I got DS a passport without his dad's approval. I just entered all his details on the application and sent off DS's birth certificate. His dad didn't have to do anything.

You don’t need a solicitor, you can apply online for prohibited steps order and child arrangements order today. Then ring the family court tomorrow and say that you need an urgent ex-parte PSO hearing. This could be done the same or following day. However you will need to convince the court that an order is necessary. eg is the father from another country? Has he a history of making threats like this? www.gov.uk/government/publications/form-c100-application-under-the-children-act-1989-for-a-child-arrangements-prohibited-steps-specific-issue-section-8-order-or-to-vary-or-discharge

Also got my DC a passport without their Dad's input.

Ring the Passport Advice Line, they will be able to tell you if the DC have a passport and you can cancel it if they do.

Thank you for the replies.

They are not back and I am going out of my mind. I've been calling round anyone I can think of and no one has seen them. His phone is on but he is ignoring my calls.

Not heard from the oldest DC.

Police didn't even come out, said I need to get myself to the courts. If he is not back with them by this evening to call them again and they will do a welfare check.

Does he have links with another country? How old is your eldest?

I so feel for you, what a horrible situation it is. Do you know where he lives? Could you or someone you know go there?

Even though he has threatened to remove them - the police still won't do a welfare check? That's awful. Can you call back and explain firmly about the previous abuse and the threat he has made?

Has something happened to cause him to suddenly threaten this? I.e did he want you to do something - change contact or reconcile and he's trying to scare you into obeying.

What a horrible situation - Keep calling people

So sorry @fmylife.
Record everything . Log every call and every threat. Keep calling police. Get a solicitor first thing (phone a charity supporting domestic abuse victims and they often have low cost solicitors or given you access to 30 minutes free services). Get your dc passports and keep them locked up. Don’t tell the dc about them in case ex finds out.

Let us know how things are.

Try reunite.org for advice.

Does he have ties to any specific country?

Good luck OP.

As for passports, you don't need the signature of the other parent. I think there's a space on the form for the passport number of the other parent isn't there? You don't have to provide it though.

OP does he have links to another country where he may realistically take them?

My instinct is the fact that he told you in advance means this is just mind games and a power play, and I really hope it is.

Definitely contact the police again if they are not returned to request a welfare check and get to the court tomorrow. Do you have a solicitor?

He has links to another country yes, he has some family there.

The threats were made after I said I will be looking to move house closer to my family, which is only an hours drive away. Still nothing so I have text and said the police have been informed.

Good luck OP.
Start with the solicitors first thing tomorrow. They will hopefully advise re wider support you will need, these things tend to take a while to resolve.

Have the police issued a port alert? Are they going to if not yet?
He’s probably got the children passports and even if you got them now, he could say they got lost / damaged and order new ones :(

Is it a Hague Convention country?

Can you phone him on someone else's phone?
Also text asking him when they will be back as, I assume, at least o e of them will be going back to school this week.

The police can’t do anything op. You need to speak to a solicitor ASAP.

You need to contact solicitor asap
The police are limited in what they can do.

Can you flag their names up at airports etc?

They returned home around 30 minutes ago, DC told me he dropped them off at the corner and they had to walk 2 minutes up the road with a 2 year old. He took them out this afternoon. No word from him.

I assume I'd need to wait until the morning to speak to a solicitor.

What a bastard. He is playing games with you.

That’s good news you have them back. Time to get yourself clued up on the issue. See a solicitor and look at reunite.org. It will be fine but fight fire with fire.