To ask what's harder, pregnant with a toddler or newborn and toddler

[Justasconfusedwithnumber2]

I'm over 38 weeks pregnant and have a 2yo. Needless to say I am floored and feel like I have become a spectator of life as I sit on the couch praying I dont have to move - but inevitably end up sat crippled on the floor playing choo choos. I have a flurry of people telling me it will be easier with a newborn but can painfully remember the 7/8 wake ups a night breastfeeding and wonder how on earth that can be easier with a 2yo to entertain during the day too!

So what did you find harder? Pregnancy +1 or baby + toddler?

I would like to add I am very happy to be having a second. I know its self inflicted. But I am also 38 weeks gone and feeling sorry for myself too!!

p.s I'm not usually this many!!

Moany even 🙄

Pregnancy and toddler. Hands down. My toddler wasn't at all bothered by/jealous of the birth of her sibling because I was so much nicer and less likely to cry once the baby was born.

Pregnant. By a million miles.

My older one is 4, def finding it harder now twin babies are here than pregnant.

I'm also 38 weeks with a 22 month old I'm exhausted there is no chill whatsoever I'm uncomfortable I dread having to play on the floor I'm hope

Pregnant and toddler.

My DM was pregnant and had both a newborn and a toddler. I don't know how she did it!

Well, mine was 4, so not really a toddler anymore but I would definitely say with a new baby. Being pregnant is just one child’s needs and big uncomfortable bump. A new baby means meeting the needs of two (with very different needs) and doing it without both hands free and on 3 hours of sleep.

Pressed post too soon

I'm hoping that newborn puss toddler will be easier as otherwise I'm screwed

Most people I know find it much, much harder to have a newborn and toddler at home in the day. You have left it a bit late, but if possible, definitely start exploring nursery / childminding options for the 2 yo — even if you have the perfect newborn, the 2 yo may regress due to lack of stimulation as you rightly focus on the baby for a bit. Nursery will help them and you.

Pregnant with 22 month old was far worse than when the baby arrived, not long to go now for you, hang on in there and look forward to those newborn snuggles.

Pregnancy and toddler.

If I was you I'd think about part time daycare for the toddler now and make the most of it once bubs is born.

Mine are 3 and 1.5 now and it's exhausting. Neither of them sleep through the night through.

Pregnant with a toddler. By miles.

Thank god the majority have said pregnancy with toddler. I feel like I'm being such a crap mum right now.

Pregnancy and a toddler. Without a doubt.

It depends on the baby. My second was a happy little chap who would quickly breastfeed until his tummy was full then sleep for hours in his sleepyhead. He never did the cluster feeding thing and never minded being put down. If I'd had another like my first, who screamed for 4 months and wouldn't be put down ever then things would have been different.

Pregnancy with a toddler, definitely!

@Justasconfusedwithnumber2 I could have written this post myself!

30 weeks with a 22 month old and I said to DH today that I just feel like I'm being a shit mum to him, because I struggle to sit on the floor and play for long periods, can't run around with him and obviously can't have him jumping all over me! I want to sit and relax but unfortunately my LO is full of beans and had other ideas (understandably). I used to get stuff done when he napped, but now I'm straight up to bed! 🙈

It's reassuring to read the above, because I too have been remembering the exhaustion, night feeds etc and am a bit terrified 🙈

Deffo pregnant with a toddler. So tired all the time, couldn't physically do much. Felt like I should be enjoying the last few months/weeks of ,1:1 time with my eldest. But I couldn't and didn't.

Then when baby arrived it was so much better. First few weeks were tough - but you expect that. It wasn't tougher than pregnancy as it wasn't so constant. There were times when both kids were crying/demanding/tantruming etc but there were times when baby slept and I could snuggle up with the eldest. There were times when both slept (hallelujah!!!) and times when we all just pottered about together quite happily.

Hang on in there, it gets better.

Sorry to say a toddler and newborn (22 month age gap). Second was also an easy baby but I found it so hard logistically. But I did also struggle in pregnancy as had SPD!

I have 4 DC and I would say for me, being pregnant was harder. But I find pregnancy hard going, low iron so always exhausted, heart burn, morning sickness, countless niggles and aches and pains. Once baby was born, I almost immediately felt like me again, and other people can help you by holding baby, taking toddler out etc. Just feeling human/no longer pregnant was fab for me, so definitely new baby and toddler is easier in my experience! Hope this is the case for you too!!

Pregnant and toddler definately (31 m age gap). My DM said something interesting she suggested that DC1 was anxious towards the end of pregnancy and this impacted their behaviour.

Oh I so needed this thread! Nearly 36 weeks with DC2, and my 2.3yr old is exhausting me... Like others I've been feeling awful that I just don't have the energy to play with him properly and I've been worried it's just going to be worse when baby arrives. I'm worried about the broken nights but with pregnancy insomnia since 2nd trimester perhaps that won't feel like such a shock! Good luck OP and fingers crossed things are easier once baby is here.

Also felt so much physically better once I had given birth.