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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to fire my cleaner

103 replies

Probablyveryirrational · 02/01/2020 14:55

I’ve had a cleaner for 2 years. To be honest she isn’t actually very good at cleaning, but she’s nice and she’s friendly with DS and the dog and with a toddler I am not keen on the hassle of replacing her etc.

However she is often late- like 40 mins or so late (and sometimes this doesn’t matter but sometimes I have people coming and it does actually mess up my plans), and today she just didn’t show up at all. I asked if she wanted some time off over Christmas (she comes twice a week), and she asked for a day off for NYE, which would be Tuesday, a day she usually comes. She is also supposed to come today and didn’t. I’m pregnant, vomiting all day and tired and very fucking pissed off because I get the impression she just doesn’t want to be here/doesn’t really give a shit about her job.

AIBU to let her go over this? Feels especially awkward as she has a set of keys...

OP posts:

Freesunglasses · 02/01/2020 17:31

@DontCallMeShitley I didn't mean to only pick on you, I just couldn't be bothered going through the thread and tagging everyone.

I see it all the time on here, make sure you get your keys back or change the locks! I can see from the home owners point of view of course they want their keys back but people saying the cleaner may duplicate them? To do what? rob the former client.

I'd say the majority of house burglaries are committed by criminals not ex cleaners.

daisychain01 · 02/01/2020 17:31

@Probablyveryirrational

I would get her to come round as normal, let her do her clean, so at least you get some value out of her, then at the end of the clean, ask her for your keys back and tell her you will need to part company effective immediately.

elmosducks · 02/01/2020 17:33

I would use between now and March to trial some new cleaners.

I absolutely adore my cleaner, she is really great and does more than I pay her for, plus always bakes for us! I have heard horror stories and I just wouldn't tolerate it. Ask her for her key back, and give her a fortnights notice.

cabbageking · 02/01/2020 17:41

She didn't turn up as required and has broken her contract.
Saves you doing the dirty work.

DontCallMeShitley · 02/01/2020 17:43

@Freesunglasses I understand your point. However, there are many more dishonest people around than there used to be and I lost a lot by trusting people with my keys. One even stole from me while I was in another room so I hope you can also see my point. Another would spend hours on the phone when I was out and then tell people about my personal affairs from reading my mail which was not left out. One took food home, if she had asked I would have given it to her if she was short. I never set any traps as I trusted them and they let me down.They were paid well. It concerned me that they had the chance to root around when I was out too. No one gets my keys any more

As I said, if she is honest she won't know if the locks are changed, if she is a thief or sells the keys on, then the risk has been reduced and the insurance would not be invalid in case of a burglary.

I know there are honest cleaners, I have met some, but not as many as I have of the other kind.

annielouise · 02/01/2020 18:00

Next time she turns up say you need the keys as you or your DH have lost yours. Don't ask her when she's coming next. Mess her around a bit by not answering text messages, not being in etc. I really doubt she'll exert herself to turning up unannounced as after all she doesn't stick to her set hours anyway. To perhaps ease the situation out keep making excuses - you're not well and don't want someone here - or have her round when you are there for set tasks - e.g. clean the windows which you can monitor her doing, clean the skirting boards, clean the kitchen cupboards out etc in readiness for the move. Let it fizzle out in other words.

annielouise · 02/01/2020 18:02

I've not had a good cleaner, not that I've employed many. I had one for a spring clean while 9 months pregnant once who was cleaning the woodwork with cold, black water. I paid her off. Who needs that?

annielouise · 02/01/2020 18:03

Or have her round for one more job, as soon as she arrives ask for the keys as you've lost yours, let her do the work then give her a month's pay and say the moving date has come forward so she's not needed, all the best etc.

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 02/01/2020 18:06

If you drive I’d tell her you’ll come bu to get the keys.

Original poster

Probablyveryirrational · 02/01/2020 19:07

I actually like the idea of telling a fib to get keys back - avoid the confrontation like the wuss/coward I am. Totally plausible to say estate agent needs it to market the flat. Then I know I have the keys and she can go whenever - and I can let her continue until I find a replacement. Which I will start trying to find tomorrow!

If anyone knows anyone I am near Esher, willing to pay whatever (more or less), including travel, looking for 6 hours a week (more when we move - staying in same location!)

OP posts:

Original poster

Probablyveryirrational · 02/01/2020 19:09

Also to the PP - yes she is self employed and can take holiday whenever she wants! I just wanted to know when she wanted to take it, which is not unreasonable I think.

OP posts:

LoveFromAfrica · 02/01/2020 19:11

Theres lots of cleaners out and more people are cleaning to earn a living so you can find someone cheaper easily. Good luck with everything.

LoveFromAfrica · 02/01/2020 19:12

By the way, check she hasn't taken anything. I've had some cleaners with sticky fingers. I stick to a trusted agency now.

Original poster

Probablyveryirrational · 02/01/2020 19:20

@lovefromafrica

I really, really don’t think she would steal. I don’t. But I do think she has broken things and covered it up. Unfortunately no way to prove that though.

OP posts:

LoveFromAfrica · 02/01/2020 19:22

That's out of order. A good cleaner would replace the broken items or avoid breaking them in the first place.

TriangleBingoBongo · 02/01/2020 19:24

YANBU we’ve had several cleaners. I don’t hesitate if the cleaning is poor to let them go. One was so bad there were still muddy paw prints on the lounge floor and food on the hob. I told her I was disappointed and said no thank you to anymore cleans.

Had some great cleaners too who we’ve paid more to keep!

Original poster

Probablyveryirrational · 02/01/2020 19:34

I really, really admire people with the balls to not put up with this sort of thing. Tbh I really should have let her go a long, long time ago.

OP posts:

Branleuse · 02/01/2020 19:39

id probably get rid of one for being a shit cleaner and breaking things, but being an hour late here and there is par for the course with all the cleaners ive had. Often mine has to juggle things around or overruns.

Then again, im happy to have people here when shes here, and I would ask that she did the room id be using for later guests first

Original poster

Probablyveryirrational · 02/01/2020 19:45

@Branleuse

I never usually mind if she come earlier or later - I’m
Very relaxed. Honestly she can switch days or times and I really don’t mind. It’s more that the times she has been late are times I have specifically requested so it feels a lot more like a piss take.

OP posts:

Freesunglasses · 02/01/2020 19:56

@lovefromafrica
That's out of order. A good cleaner would replace the broken items or avoid breaking them in the first place.

Do you think cleaners break things on purpose? I'm human, it happens. That's why I have insurance.

Merryoldgoat · 02/01/2020 20:08

I actually think the biggest issue with cleaners is a mismatch of expectations.

I had one who expected every surface to be clear, floors clear etc so she could just clean unencumbered and this obviously wasn’t unreasonable as she came well recommended.

However that’s not what I need. A need a less officious cleaner who will do s bit of tidying/organising as needed.

I’m often home with a sick child so if she arrived to chaos I want her to assess what’s needed and do that.

The lady I’ve found is fantastic. She woke me up today as I was asleep on the sofa with the toddler who was up until 4am.

She couldn’t do some stuff as we were all gone so instead she cleaned the oven and dusted all the bookcases and organised a few kitchen cupboards.

Sometimes she leaves a bit early but that’s fine by me. We ‘work’.

Try a few out and get a feel next time - you’ll get the right fit.

If only you were a bit closer to Wimbledon - Esher is a bit far for her to travel to.

Original poster

Probablyveryirrational · 02/01/2020 20:19

Do you think cleaners break things on purpose? I'm human, it happens. That's why I have insurance

Breaking things is not a problem. Lying about breaking things is a problem.

OP posts:

spingly · 02/01/2020 20:26

I'm in surrrey and my cleaner is ace, you do seem to be paying an awful lot. What's the hourly rate?

Original poster

Probablyveryirrational · 02/01/2020 20:29

We pay 12£ an hour which is standard around here; but we are happy to pay more than that, up to 15£ an hour if necessary. I have been trying to beg my old cleaner to come back but she left as we moved too far away and the journey didn’t work anymore 😢😢😢

Tbh I might just start trying to look for someone who wants to do a bit of housework/helping with the children for several hours a week now I have another one coming. But not sure how feasible that is to find either!

OP posts:

spingly · 02/01/2020 20:31

@Probablyveryirrational yeah we pay £11.50 so her rate isn't excessive.

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