To love my husband?

[BadEyeBri]

He isn't perfect. I probably do more "wifework" than I should. He's sometimes a bit pester-y for sex. He drinks a bit too much. He's the most self centred creature I've ever met. He swears and is a huffy bastard.
But he lets me use him as decompression when I've had a bad day. He loves all the many (many) animals I've filled the house with. He's never pressured me for kids. He moved to a different country just for me. I've never once doubted that he loves me.
So many posts I read could be written by me about him on a bad day. So many advising LTB. AIBU to love the bastard?

@AnneLovesGilbert see you've lost me now with all that nonsense.
My point with this post is there is a large group on MN who are like harpies ready to pounce with their LTB posts or your bar is so low or you have self esteem issues. When actually most people are less than perfect so most relationships are less than perfect and all of it takes work and compromise.

Means there is no chance of the rest of us accidentally ending up with him!

^ This

and at the Perfect Pete...personally he sounds more like Horrid Henry but either way I'm glad I don't have to put up with him.

Knock yourself out OP. Winning at life!

I think he sounds pretty shit, but horses for courses and all that.

BadEyeBri I agree.

There is a middle ground somewhere between 'perfect life' and 'sharing life with a huffy sex pest'.

@AloneLonelyLoner I'm quite shit too. We are probably shit in compatible ways. No one on these threads ever takes responsibility for their own shitness. I am a one woman minefield of crap.

@isabellerossignol but there can't be a middle ground because perfect life doesn't f**king exist. That's like saying there's a middle ground between Santa and The Tooth Fairy

If you are happy that is all that matters.

Christ on a bike there are some bitchy comments on this post

Stockholm syndrome is a toughy

@hellodontworry wow that's choice 😆

What's an example of him being the most self centred person you've ever met?

Surely we ALL have our flaws though. I mean, for example; I can be a lazy cow & not to the washing up all day even though I know it winds DP up & he can be a useless tosser & his dirty socks will STILL be on the bedroom floor just as I've emptied the dirty laundry basket AGAIN! But in spite of this & our other foibles we make each other happy & we love each other. Surely that's all that matters.

I hate huffing. My husband does that. I love him but huffing is not one of his best qualities.

If your standards are this low but you're happy then carry on

@Shoxfordian give your head a wee wobble, eh? Everything in your garden perfectly perfect?

Wow he has done a line on you!!

So you have such low esteem and he knows that his putting up with stuff he doesn't give a shit about means he can pester you for sex, swear and drink too much and be utterly self centred?

Good luck with that long term.

Ask yourself if you would be friends with a person who He's sometimes a bit pester-y for sex. He drinks a bit too much. He's the most self centred creature I've ever met. He swears and is a huffy bastard.

If the answer is no then YABU.

great if it is for you. Wouldn't be for me but that's me.

My mum said to me that you should marry someone whose worst fault you can put up with. I think that is good advice.

you can put up with huffiness, pestering about sex and being the most self-centred person you know (that's a bit strong tbh - is he REALLY the most self-center person you know -wow).

I couldn't. But I can put up with dh's faults. So if you are happy and he is happy, that is great.

I do think a lot of people (not saying you OP) on MN have actually little idea of what a normal functional relationship looks like and how happy a home and life can be.

I can't be doing with huffs. Apart from that he sounds ok. I could list DH's faults and he wouldn't appeal to many here but he has many lovely qualities and I would not LTB.

So, keep him if you are happy. A man who is kind to animals has a lot going for him.

What were you hoping for from this thread, OP?

Lots of men are self-centred I think, even when they try hard not to be and think they aren't.

I’m a big huffer, I’m quite PA, can be controlling

He can be lazy, mither me for sex and at times dresses really shit

But we rub along nicely and have nice holidays

What were you hoping for from this thread, OP?

They wanted to have a go at the women on MN who try to help one another. So they did.

Yeah I dont think anyone is perfect nor would you find the perfect relationship.

I think if you love him knowing all his faults and him yours, and you are both happy, then surely that's what matters.

I do however think maybe this is the wrong audience (in the majority, not all, but the majority )