To think DH has a nap issue.

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Will start by saying this is not a Christmas nap have a go as everyone relaxes at Christmas and naps etc but this goes on all year round.

He's 31, fit and healthy (runs a bit) and does a desk job. No medical needs.

He works 35h week and chooses to go in for 7am to finish early. We don't need childcare for him to do so he just likes to get in (to nap presumably) but some of the time he makes dinner and does diy.

But the napping situation is out of hand. He falls asleep everywhere, in the morning, at bight, can't watch tv, has to drink coffee and coke to do long drives (and he works ah hour away so I worry about it.

He 'needs' 3 espressos and a long shower in the morning to wake up. If he doesn't get that he's dozy and drowsy and will fall asleep again as soon as he sits down.

Just been to PIL and notice that FIL and BIL are exactly the same. But I also noticed when they made coffee in the morning they made it (not joking) half the cafetière coffee and half water.

They had at least 3/4 cups before breakfast and constantly through the day which I thought was mad! I would have an anxiety attack I think if I drank 10 cups of coffee that strong a day. I had one or two a day (and I asked for weak which was what I thought was normal coffee to most other people) and that was met wit derision and calling my drinks baby coffee.

But then FIL and BIL were also dozing constantly. At 9pm they both excused themselves to get to bed. They had got up at 7. This continued all 5 days. We hadn't done any real exersize except for one day we went for a hike. BIL is 25.

Aibu to think they have a dependency on caffeine and dh is going the same way?

He's just disappeared for a nap after taking dd to the park for an hour. Said he couldn't stay up for new year if he didn't have a nap.

I find it all so bizarre we are young, fit and healthy and shouldn't need to nap all the time?

I’d imagine it’s going to be tough getting him to see the doctor?
Explain to him the impact his tiredness/amount of naps is having on the family... surely he doesn’t want to feel so tired all the time?

I think sleep apnoea too. Will he snore and stop in the middle for a few seconds and restart again. Get him to fill an Epworth sleepiness scale form and take to GP. If he is moderate to high they can send him to a sleep clinic o be assessed.

This was me for years, November last year I had a sleep study and have sleep apnea. I've had a cpap machine since February this year and now I sleep better and no more snoring or napping. It sounds like your hubby has sleep apnea too. I was just like him, felt tired all the time, fell asleep everywhere if I sat down for too long. Getting the cpap has literally changed my life

Those of you with sleep apnoea, are you overweight?

I'm still a little overweight after losing 4 stone, but loosing the weight didn't change anything. My consultant says it's not my weight that has caused it, my throat passage is too narrow and my throat collapses. I'll always have it even if I was a skinny mini now. I've always snored as a child and before I had children, the extra weight came after 6 children, and yes it did make things worse but didn't cause my sleep apnea

I think some people just do nap. I can't nap, even on hot summer holidays, it makes me really bad tempered. But DH has always napped from the day I met him, in his teens. On non-working days (and days when he works from home), he naps after lunch for about 1/2 hour. He did the same as a student. I think it is habit forming, but he is grumpy if he doesn't nap...... so, I let it be. I think a study some time ago said that a good power nap in the middle of the day was a good thing, or perhaps they have changed their minds now.

GP
Sounds like sleep apnea .
I have severe sleep apnea.
Would stop breathing 39 times a hour all night long .
Now on CPAP.

Those of you with sleep apnoea, are you overweight?

I have sleep apnea and am not overweight. It is a risk factor but not the only possible cause. Just the shape and softness of the palate can cause it.

I am two stone overweight yes but I've had symptoms of sleep apnea even when I was 8 stone.
I have always snored horrifically.
I am also 26 and a woman so not in the usual risk group of overweight middle aged man..
Anyone can have sleep apnea regardless off weight .

Sounds potentially like narcolepsy to me. www.nhs.uk/conditions/narcolepsy/

I'd see if he'll l make an appointment after reading the NHS info.

Too much caffeine. My DH is the same. I managed to get him off caffeine completely and it was such a dramatic change. He periodically goes back to full caff, the same thing happens and he eventually accepts he can't drink caffeine. Then round again. Try a detox, but you might find he's mentally addicted to the coffee and feels he 'needs' it or the sleep will get worse.

Does he sleep well at night?Or is he constantly waking up .It certainly seems unusual TBH .I would certainly encourage him to visit the Doc if possible .You can get Iron drinks /floradix from health shops .These may help as well .If he is drinking so much caffiene this can stop the body from absorbing Iron properly.

They all snore quite badly

You need to be aware that this could be a serious medical issue OP. He needs a referral to a sleep clinic to find out what's happening. If he does have something like sleep apnea he could end up in real trouble as he ages.

I agree check out any hidden health issues via blood tests for iron, vit D, b12, glandular fever, etc. Sleep test as well.

But if it’s all clear, he may just be like many humans who naturally have a biphasic sleep pattern. Not all people are wired to sleep once in each 24hr cycle or monophasic sleepers. A good % actually do better if they get their 8-10hrs of sleep in two chunks every day. So a 6-7hr long sleep plus a 1-4hr “nap”.

DH is a napper. This Christmas, he's had about 4 a day on average.

He falls asleep coming in from work, has a good 45 minutes, then falls asleep another 2/3 times before bed. Then he gets into bed, doesn't sleep and is up for hours. It literally drives me round the bend, and he goes into proper sleep at 4am. So I'd say he gets around 3 quality hours sleep at night. He's asleep now after a long dog walk

He's also a massive caffeine addict. He has around 20/25 huge mugs of coffee and tea a day. I've tried everything - showing him research, begging, crying, the GP, you name it - and we've seriously nearly divorced over it. But nothing breaks the cycle. His B12 and Iron levels were fine and no medical issues.

DH does this. He's 70 now but has been like this for 20 years. Drops asleep several times a day and could nap on a tightrope. He has very irregular sleeping habits though, will go to bed at midnight and be up for a couple of hours in the night then up again at 7.30. I strongly suspect apnoea but he refuses to have it looked at.
DS2 on the other hand is 21 and easily tired, he goes for what he calls a power nap most days for half an hour. No known health issues but he is vegetarian and I wonder whether he is missing some dietary nutrient.

Perhaps addicted to caffeine and so it's doing the reverse and he's "crashing" ?

Could honestly be a number of things so I'd suggest seeing a doctor to rule anything out.

@Junie70 I switched my hubby to decaf without him knowing. Just got some decaf instant that is the same colour as the regular instant and topped up the jar each day, so a gradual switch. Did the same with the ground coffee. He didn't notice, but when his sleep improved I told him. He then agreed to stick with it as he was feeling the benefits.

I’d be more worried about the cocaine use prior to a drive. Or do you mean cola😉

My DH is similar. It drives me mad that we'll sit down to watch something together and when I glance sideways at him, his chin is on his chest and he's fast to sleep! Every bloody time! Yet if I tell him to go to bed, he gets all cross and says he's not tired.

Does he actually go to sleep at night. Hes not up gaming or watching you tube on his phone?

To anyone that is reluctant to get there selves checked for sleep apnea
Using CPAP really is not that bad 😁.
I've gone from 39 events a hour to a average of 1!
I usually sleep around 9 hours a day now but that 12 hours was after the Xmas chaos last week.

We had a family Christmas at home and DD was forever taking photos on her phone. She posted them on our family WhatsApp and DH acted all surprised that in 50% of them he was asleep!

Needs to see the GP. Actually sounds like narcolepsy to me. It's not all like in the movies where you fall asleep suddenly in the middle of something. A friend of mine in her 30s was recently diagnosed and one of the symptoms was a need to nap!

Does he stop breathing in his sleep OP? Does he wake himself up snoring?
If he can’t do normal every day activities without falling asleep I would be suspicious of some form of sleep disorder.
No cataplexy or night terrors or hitting/ kicking out at night/ acting out his dreams?
Do his Epworth sleepiness score to see if there’s an issue.

www.blf.org.uk/support-for-you/obstructive-sleep-apnoea-osa/diagnosis/epworth-sleepiness-scale