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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who is BU here?

53 replies

MyNameHasBeenTaken · 31/12/2019 11:41

I will try not to ramble

Person A owns a snake
Person B usually holds and plays with the snake while person A cleans out the snake cage.
All good so far. Been fine for a couple of years.
Snakey is quite large, so has limited other places to be, apart from in his cage, in the bath (supervised as he can escape in a few seconds) or held by a person.
Person A has decided they want to move in to a friends mini-flat.
They did not discuss anything about this with person B
They walked out and left snakey.
Person B has been feeding and watering snakey. And holding him.
But person B cannot supervise snakey and clean his cage at the same time. Neither can person A, which is why they usually work together.
Person A has been ignoring all requests for advice and assistance
Person B has been feeding and watering but not cleaning snakey.
Who is U?
YABU - B should find a way to clean out snakey
YANBU - A should be offering advice or assistance with snakey

OP posts:
ThanosSavedMe · 31/12/2019 12:26

The snake belongs to A. It is their responsibly to sort out feeding and cleaning

fedup21 · 31/12/2019 12:31

Person A needs to come and take their bloody snake away.

DontCallMeShitley · 31/12/2019 12:33

There are rescues for reptiles, rehome snakey.

Original poster
MyNameHasBeenTaken · 31/12/2019 12:39

Thanks all
Pillow case reply - perfect idea, thanks.
Snakey is a corn. About 1m 30 cm long.
Not "huge and unhandleable" but too big for the little spare box the other snake goes in for cleaning.
Unfortunately we do not have either the space or the money for a second large RUB.
But the pillow case is genius

Snakey is well loved and welcome here.
Person C is a child who adores snakey, but is no way big enough to look after him. But I think C could supervise a tied up pillow case and call B if snakey finds his way out.

OP posts:
haukeli · 31/12/2019 12:42

A is BU and shouldn't have abandoned their snake. Totally irresponsible.

If you want to keep the snake then there are plenty of suggestions on here as to how to contain it while you clean the cage.

Jumpi · 31/12/2019 12:48

What kind of life is this for a snake?

fedup21 · 31/12/2019 12:49

Why are you ignoring all the people who said person A needs to come and take their snake??

Beautiful3 · 31/12/2019 13:09

Looks like noone wants it. How sad for the snake. Google if there are any reptile centres you can give it to. Dont let the poor snake live in filth. If you're struggling then give it to people who will properly care for it.

Frariedeamin · 31/12/2019 13:18

Corn snakes are easy! They can fit in a smallish tub (think under double the size of a shoebox) for 20 mins while you clean them out. I used to have 2 and they were separated for feeding in a tub that size for feeding! Both went in for cleaning!

bridgetreilly · 31/12/2019 13:21

Person B should rehome the snake asap.

notanotherjigsawpiece · 31/12/2019 13:23

Person A shouldn’t have abandoned their pet.

However if Person B wants to keep the snake, surely he/she can sort out a way of managing it themselves. I’m sure plenty of people who live alone keep snakes!

ALLMYSmellySocks · 31/12/2019 13:29

The owner of the snake is obviously unreasonable. I would rehome the snake via a proper organisation (not just through Facebook).

Marshmallow91 · 31/12/2019 13:30

I'm a very avid reptile keeper. It's a well known fact in the world of herpatologists that once a snake reaches over 6 foot it should never be handled alone, due to the difficulty of un-wrapping. With two people, even a 16-18 foot snake is relatively easy to unwrap when it decides to hold on and get comfy.

Whoever owns the snake is solely responsible for its upkeep and should have back up plans if their first choice can't make it /moves/decides not to help any more. Its responsible keeping. For the record I've owned Afroks, tegus, boscs, iguanas, yellow and green anacondas, and many others. Never had a problem with any.

Motoko · 31/12/2019 13:46

My ex had a Burmese python, was about 6 foot long. Lovely snake. He used to put it in the living room and shut the door, while he was cleaning the tank (tank was in another room).

NameChangeNugget · 31/12/2019 13:48

Person A, should be reported. Disgraceful

looselegs · 31/12/2019 13:53

Person A needs to rehome the snake if they're not prepared to help with it anymore

Original poster
MyNameHasBeenTaken · 31/12/2019 13:56

Nobody is ignoring advice!
Person B is happy to look after snakey.
And will be cleaning it later, while it is safely enclosed in a pillow case.
Thanks PP, that is an awesome tip.
One that A and B have not needed in the past, as B has played with snake while A cleaned the cage.
To all the posters suggesting A collects snakey, that would be ideal, but A has no suitable transport.
B could deliver snakey, but A is unresponsive on communications, so might be out all day if B tried to deliver.
Leaving snakey on the doorstep in this weather wouldn't be the best plan??
B is happy to keep snakey. But didn't have any idea how to keep him safe while his box was cleaned.

OP posts:
HaveeeeYouMetTed · 31/12/2019 14:23

A is unreasonable to abandon their pet.
B isn't necessarily unreasonable but sounds a bit dim to be looking after such an intelligent creature when they can't even think of a box with air holes by themselves & have therefore left a pet living in a dirty, smelly environment.

fedup21 · 31/12/2019 14:26

Person A and B both seem completely irresponsible pet owners!

MrOnionsBumperRoller · 31/12/2019 14:27

Take Snakey to person A's new abode and slither him her them through the letterbox Wink

willloman · 31/12/2019 14:28

seems like person A used to own snake, snake has now been left to B. B should find a loving home for snake (and work on developing own backbone) OR learn ambidexterity...

Cherrysoup · 31/12/2019 14:31

Just lock him in the bathroom-toilet lid firmly closed-while you clean out his viv. And don’t let your dc get more pets if they’re not going to look after them.

WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles · 31/12/2019 15:30

God almighty I wish people would stop with this A and B bollocks Hmm it's obvious you are B and A is in the wrong, surely you don't need to be told that? People can't really advise you the best way forward without knowing who A is - there is a difference between and ExP and an adult DC for example.

And stop saying snakey Grin unless it is it's actual name (also BU, give it a better one Wink)

LochJessMonster · 31/12/2019 15:45

It never looks very comfortable for the snake to be curled up on itself in a tank with little space to move Most snakes, including corn snakes do not like big enclosures. The prefer smaller, safer spaces.
Corn snakes are not a particularly active species either, give them a hollow log to lay in all day and a moist/water area and they are happy.

MitziK · 31/12/2019 16:07

Snakey needs to be found a new home by Person B before Snakey gets too big for Little Person C to handle and begins to suffer.

And Person A is entirely responsible for Snakey's predicament/impending homelessness situation, so merits no concern whatsoever, whether they be a selfish 16-18 year old or a doubly selfish 46 year old.

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