To be worried that my body will never be the same again?

[HighOnStilts]

I'm 25 years old, 28+1 weeks pregnant with my first. I struggled with my weight in my early teens, weighed about 13 stone at my heaviest when I was around 16/17. I went on a crash diet and lost a lot of weight, before I got pregnant I was weighing around 10 stone. It's only hit me recently that my body is never going to be the same after having baby. My OH loves me and my body and has reassured me he wont think any differently after I've had baby, but I can't help but feel like I'm going to feel really shit about myself. My body is doing an amazing thing right now and I am so in awe at my bump. I'm also incredibly scared about tearing if I have a vaginal delivery, and if I will look 'different' down there. We're getting married in 2021 and I know my weight will be at the forefront of my mind until that point, I still need to buy my wedding dress but hoping that will be motivation for me to lose any baby weight I might have.
Apologies for the long post! X

I lost weight after both pregnancies - all that haring about after toddlers and pushing prams up the huge hill we live on and my boobs are bigger (I breastfed both but they look great now).
My body is different tho - I had 2 sections so I have a delightful scar and a little "shelf" which is odd. But all in all I think I have a better relationship with my body now - it did some amazing things...

Things do change but not always for the worse! As an example - sorry if TMI but I have had better sex since having a baby - dunno why, it seemed to change something and though I couldn't orgasm from PIV before getting pregnant, I could after!

It will take some time to recover and you might notice some changes but with a healthy lifestyle, there's no reason why you wouldn't lose the baby weight.

I spent my phone first pregnancy worrying about how my body was going to change. A lot of the time I was in tears over it and planned all sorts of things to help me lose weight after. I have a few stretch marks and scar where I had an episiotomy but it was weird, after I just didn't really care as much. I dont think i have changed that much mentally but i had some friends who have had serious stuff happen to them (babies severely ill, a stillbirth etc) and I was just grateful that everything was ok. Or maybe I was too busy and tired to care any more, I don't know. I lost the baby weight without thinking about it. The second time I didnt, and i dont care too much about that either, other that it's annoying that my clothes dont fit as well.

I had my first at age 37, and was back to my normal weight 2 weeks later. I didn't really do anything, although I did try to eat quite healthy throughout the pregnancy. I had an episitomy and stitches, it took a while to recover but pregnant again now (age 39) and very happy with my body

I was probably at my heaviest at around age 19-24 Had dc at 30 and 33 and my body has genuinely not changed bar my c section scars which I'm rather fond of. I've no stretch marks or loose skin and maintained roughly the same weight since about age 26

Thanks again ladies for your awesome comments! I am totally prepared for my body not being the same as it was before, it's not that I expect it to spring back as soon as my baby is out but just wanted some reassurance with regards to how you ladies felt about your body afterwards. I know my body is doing an incredible thing and I am so grateful I have been lucky enough to have an easy pregnancy so far! X

Another chiming in to say your body might not change too much - but even if it does, it’s ok. You may not care as much once baby is here anyway. When my eldest was born I felt like everything I’d ever done, good and bad, had been worth it to bring me to that point, to meet her for the first time. I could have been made of stretch marks and it would still have been totally worth it. I don’t look exactly the same as I did before, but I wouldn’t expect to, and tbh I still look great, wobbly bits and all. Your baby will think you’re the most amazing, beautiful person in the universe no matter what you look like - seeing myself through my children’s eyes has been an unexpected gift. I am happier in myself now than I ever was and I wish the same for you (and all new mothers!).

@FourForYouGlenCoco that's such a lovely comment, thank you 😊

You may not change much at all. I had my first at 21, second at 24, and I'm 3 weeks post partum with twins at 26. I weigh exactly what I did at my booking appointment with my first, fit in the same clothes, and have come back to pre-pregnancy size (10) within a couple of days for every pregnancy. Never had so much as a graze despite my singletons being 8lb-ers, and the first twin being breech and just shy of 7lb at 38+4.

That said, life changes us. I will develop wrinkles, my skin will sag, I will develop new moles, get new scars... we have to learn to not care how life changes our bodies, because we can't control it and it'll only cause unnecessary stress.

@Spanneroo Wow, you warrior woman!! I'm kind of hoping for a waterbirth (if it's possible when the time comes) I hear that can help minimise the chances of tearing and is much more relaxing overall. But I'm not holding out much hope and will just do what I need to when the time comes! X

Time will change your body. That is inescapable. Pregnancy may or may not make much difference. Honestly, you are making a human, regardless of dimensions your body is amazing.

Stilts my first and second were water births and I highly recommend them. Having the personal space, support of the water, and the pain relief it brings is great! I was gutted when my first twin turned breech as it meant I couldn't have one (they actually told me I had to have a c-section, but I declined, and I'm very very glad I did!)

The only noticeable change for me having at baby at 38 was that my feet went from a size five to a size seven. Had to buy new shoes.

I’ve got stretch marks on my lower stomach and shadows under my eyes () but apart from that I’m still in good nick after two dc. Try not to worry, have the baby, see what the damage is and work at it from there. Lots of us spring back and even if you don’t, if it bothers you then there is plenty you can do about it. Good luck for the birth.

@Spanneroo That's so fab to hear! Only problem is there is only one birthing pool at the local hospital so if it's taken when I'm admitted that's that plan out of the window lol. I'm hoping to do it all on gas and air but I know it's still way too early for me to be saying that 🙈

@Ronnie27 thank you, that's so lovely! I've got stretch marks on my hips from my early teens but non on my belly yet - I've still got 12 weeks until I'm due and a lot more stretching to go. I'm using bio oil every evening before bed but not sure it will really help lol.

I snapped right back into shape after my first (and that was with a cesarean).

Similar with my second but whilst I am not lighter than before I had her I'm still a size bigger it's like my ribs and hips expanded and then never went back in.

It’s highly unlikely it’ll be the same.

How you frame the future, is important. Good luck

It won't.

I had my first at 19.

My stomach got covered in stretch marks. And I mean covered.

Tits went completely south. Had massive overhang.

Never got better. Only worse with more kids. Its just the reality of mother hood for some. Some are luckier. Some have surgery.

@ilovethickboys2 oh my god, what?! That sounds horrific 😱

@highonstilts!! oh god nothat didn't happen to me!!

@ilovethickboys2 oh well thank god! Started to feel a bit terrible about my thread all of a sudden! 😅

WTF thickboys.

@MotherOfSoupDragons yeah that kind of disturbed me a bit 😳