Holiday ruined due to my weight.

[Emmas85]

I've got a trip of a lifetime booked to New York in January, been booked for a year in order to pay for it. I am so overweight, need to lose 7 stone to be a healthy bmi (size 18/20) I've tried every diet so many times and here I am still huge and I feel like I've ruined the trip for myself already. I am really unfit so am dreading the walking already, the plane seat, the plane tray not coming down and having to pretend I'm asleep so no one notices. I don't even know why I'm posting tbh but I feel a bit better having 'said' it out loud. Aibu to think it's ruined before it's even started.

I sent to NYC May 2019. I was similar weight to you. I brought a pair of sketchers before the trip and they were a life saver.

I would recommend some walks before you go it will help.

Just to add I had no issue with the seat belt on the plane and had an amazing time.

I’ve just flown to the Middle East a size 18/20 - plane no issues at all, went to the pool, went into the desert, walked a lot, rode a camel. Honestly, I would have preferred to go slimmer but it didn’t hamper me in anyway. Am sure it will be the same in New York.

Thank you. Yes 7 stone to lose. I'm currently size 18/20 at 17 stone 😩 I'm 5ft 4.

You will see improvements to your health, fitness and appearance through with much smaller weight losses. I would set each stone as a goal and celebrate every achievement.
A book recommended on here which I have used is Atomic Habits - it's not about losing weight but about how we can change any habit. Methods are more important than goals in it, and easier to stick to.

I have no sympathy with “I have tried every diet”. Eat less.

Oh look, the weight fascists have arrived 🙄

For the road ahead, try to reframe this - I am so overweight, need to lose 7 stone.

Break it down into daily goals instead:
'I need to walk 5000 steps today'
'I need to sit and meditate today for 20 minutes'
'I need to take the stairs for five flights instead of the lift today'

Keep a little journal where you note positives of your day, things that made you smile, things you liked, and the odd thing you appreciated about yourself. There is more to you than your weight.

If you want to, OP, you could easily lose at least half a stone with slimming world before you go, which would probably boost your confidence a lot and make you feel a lot happier about the trip.

On my first week on SW I lost half a stone and my friend lost 9lbs! We have both lost over 4 stone and kept it off for years. I'd highly recommend it even though others on MN don't always think highly of SW.

After two weeks on SW I went to America for two weeks and lost another 5lb whilst away. I found it easy to eat healthily whilst there.

I have no sympathy with “I have tried every diet”. Eat less

You have no manners, either. I bet you'd never be so rude as to say that to someone IRL.

OP you could take this as a turning point - enjoy your trip, but also mark 2020 as the year you get healthy. You can do it :) take loads of photos, and they'll be the 'before' to your 'after' in Jan 2021. :)

I was bigger than you and I had a similar turning point - use this feeling as motivation to make real, lifetime changes.

@Vikingess
You clearly don't understand the science behind losing weight!
psychologyofeating.com/3-reasons-diets-dont-work/

www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2015/05/04/why-diets-dont-actually-work-according-to-a-researcher-who-has-studied-them-for-decades/

Obesity is a disorder of excess energy accumulation and there is support for the fact that anyone can lose weight by consistently creating a sufficiently large caloric deficit, going back to research done in WWII:

Minnesota Starvation Experiment

36 men were put on a diet of 1600 calories per day and required to walk a total of 22 miles per week. Three dropped out, one was booted for cheating, the other 32 all lost weight.

More recent research is consistent with this finding:

Treatment of obesity by moderate and severe caloric restriction. Results of clinical research trials.

The metabolic effect (aka the "starvation" effect) can be mitigated with exercise.

Starvation Mode

Reduced calorie diets are indeed hard to maintain and eating habits are hard to change, but some people cling to the idea that there is something unusual about their metabolism that causes diets to fail for them them. Most of the time they are underestimating their caloric intake or overestimating their caloric expenditure. Calories in vs calories out is simply physics.

I've lost 7 pounds in the last month by eating less and moving more.

I've lost 7 pounds in the last month by eating less and moving more.
You sound like you're bragging. Come back in a year and see how much weight you've really lost. The truth is that weight loss is far more complex than the simple calories in v calories burned. Don't you think that if it's were as simple as that, there wouldn't be an obesity epidemic?

Come back in a year and see how much weight you've really lost. The truth is that weight loss is far more complex than the simple calories in v calories burned. Don't you think that if it's were as simple as that, there wouldn't be an obesity epidemic?

I might plateau for a while now. I might even gain some of it back if I'm not careful, but I'm down 21 pounds from my weight 12 months ago.

Metabolic rates are influenced by lots of factors and can make losing weight easier or harder, but it still comes down to CICO. There were no obese people in the POW and concentration camps at the end of WWII. That's actually why the Minnesota study was conducted in the first place.

We have an obesity epidemic because we evolved in settings where calories were scarce and it was a survival advantage to be able to store them as fat when they were available. Those were also times where a lot of caloric expenditure was required for survival. We now live in times where calorie dense foods are cheap and constantly available and it's easy for most people to live a sedentary life.

The evolution of human adiposity and obesity: where did it all go wrong?

The idea that the obesity epidemic has a medical or physiological basis assumes that large numbers of people are somehow different medically or physiologically than people were 100, 1,000 or 10,000 years ago when obesity was quite rare, which seems quite unlikely. What has changed is the environment around us.

I think people are rather suggesting a psychological element to obesity which is not sorted by waking up one day going "calories in versus calories out!"

Update-
Just to let all you lovely people know that I went and I not only survived but I loved it!
I walked everywhere, my steps were on average 26,000 a day and although I was so tired I was able to do everything. I saw all the sights and did everything I wanted to do. Another great thing is I joined Slimming world before I went and weighed this morning and have lost 8lb!! Thank you so much everyone you really spurred me on! Onwards and downwards (weight wise)

Nice one OP. Sounds like a brilliant holiday!

Well done, glad you had a great time!

So pleased you had a good time.

Well done op- I lost 5 stone in 7 months with SW a few years ago. I’ve put a couple back on over the past two years but if you stick with it it works.

Well done OP, glad to hear that you went and had a great time

Wonderful. I’m so pleased that you enjoyed your holiday and good luck with your ongoing SW journey.

@OP
Love a happy ending, glad you had fun!!

That’s brilliant - So glad you had a lovely time x

Fab update
Carry on - you will get there
I’ve been doing SW for 3 years and lost 7 stone
Hoping to get to my ideal weight in 2020

Ah that’s a lovely update OP. Glad you had a fab time and good luck with SW.