Me and my DP have hardly spoken since Boxing Day evening because i found out he had had his sister in my car on Xmas day.
Let me go into a little background on this.
So, his brother and sister are drug addicts, each using cannabis and crack, his sister also uses heroin. He doesn't have a great deal to do with any of his family, well siblings.. mum deceased and dad not around. He is the only one of 3 of them that has made anything of themselves. Holds down a decent job, sustains himself rather than abusing the benefit system. He is the only one that ever gave their mum anything to be proud of. Never done drugs, barely even drinks alcohol.
I absolutely loathe his sister. Until me and my DP lived together he was living with his sister, although hardly ever there as either with me or working so it was just a case of sleeping there a few nights a month. He ended up living there as he moved back to the area and it was just an easy option and his sister wasn't on the drugs then (she's been on and off for years, 2 kids already in care). She also had her 2 year old there and he was helping out with his nephew. So he put his house stuff in storage. Their mum died and his sister ended up back on drugs and slowly but surely the drug use got heavier and heavier.
She began stealing from him, money, keys to his storage unit, sold his furniture, he was having to sleep with his wallet and phone under his pillow. She'd use his phone to call drug dealers and then he'd have them ringing him threatening him when she owed money. He has life insurance policy and she questioned him on what would happen to his money in the event of his death, 2 weeks after this he found a note in his wallet saying "my name is such and such, i am (name) sister and next of kin, please contact me in the event of an emergency"..
She started having dealers there cutting up on the kitchen worktops because she'd be paid in drugs, then men for sexual favours. If my DP was asleep in bed she would go out at all hours leaving her son and my partner unaware that he was supposed to be looking after the little one. He would pay his rent and that same night all the money would be gone that she'd be asking, begging and crying for more money. He did the weekly shop, ensuring nephew had milk, nappies etc. Taking his nephew out to get him away from the situation as much as possible. (Social services are involved)
He gave his sister a lift once and she dropped crack in his car, down the edge of seat and couldn't retrieve it. My DP walked to the shop with nephew and came back to find his seat had been taken out of his car by a neighbour after his sister had asked them to remove it so she could get the crack. obviously it's better out of the car than in it but the whole thing was insane.
His brother was constantly stopped by police and if they seen him in a car that car was pulled over and he was searched, vehicle was searched. DP had been stopped a few times with him in the car and he was searched at side of road too. It got to the point where my DP told him he isn't giving him a lift anywhere again and to not bother asking.. and he hasn't.
So, sorry bit of a long one..
Xmas day my DP went to go see his nephew, i don't have anything to do with any of them (i've been there before where dealers turned up to use kitchen and after that i said never again) i stayed at home with my family while he went to see his nephew. He turned up there and his nephew wasn't there, just his sister. I'm annoyed about my DP taking his sister back to where his nephew was, at the nephews dad for number of reasons. 1 - his nephew is not allowed to see his dad over fears for his safety, nephews dad has some serious mental health issues, once trying to put a drill through his ear to stop the voices. so that annoyed me that she shows complete disregard for that.
2 - my DP used my car, he did have a car of his own but since living together sold it as he drives a van and he just uses my car when needs be, so what if she'd dropped some of her crack/heroin in my car, a child in my family gets hold of it or we are pulled over, it's found by police.. we wouldn't have a leg to stand on in saying it's not ours.. how many times have they heard that!?
3 - she has stolen from my DP car before so why wouldn't she mine. She stole from their own mother.
Fortunately, he won't tell any of his family where exactly his living now, so that she can't turn up here begging or potentially stealing from us. We both work very hard for what we have and i don't want any of them jeopardising any of that.
I genuinely don't think my DP thought about it like i have, but we haven't spoken properly since Boxing Day evening because he can become defensive about it, although he knows it's the truth he is just so ashamed of his family.
AIBU to not want them in any of my property, including my car!?