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AIBU?

to be shocked that my sister and her husband are going to give their new baby just her surname?

164 replies

Caroline1852 · 26/08/2007 12:25

My sister did not change her name on marriage and her and her husband are expecting their first child in November. They plan to give their baby just her surname. Am I alone in thinking this is a bit odd but I am worried for her. Will people assume that the baby is hers from a previous marriage and her husband is the stepfather? Will it be odd for the child?

OP posts:

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lady007pink · 27/08/2007 15:32

Caroline, out of curiosity, have you any brothers? If you haven't, I imagine your sister wants to keep your family name going IYKWIM.

Dinosaur · 27/08/2007 15:34

I think it's cool actually. We did the opposite - I never changed my name but the DCs have DH's surname with my surname as an extra middle name so they can use it if they want to. But I actually rather wish we'd just used my surname.

prettybird · 27/08/2007 15:43

I regret not putting my surname into ds' name as one of the middle names - but to be honest, it would have been really unmanageable and he would almost defnitely have dropped it. he has only jsut now, at nealry 7, leanrt how to pronounce it!

Caroline1852 · 27/08/2007 16:02

We have no brothers. Four girls.

OP posts:

Caroline1852 · 27/08/2007 16:05

Anna - One really does learn something new every day. The double hyphen is hilarious. Thanks for explaining that.

OP posts:

Anna8888 · 27/08/2007 16:11

Hilarious? A real pain

prettybird · 27/08/2007 16:12

So Anna8888, when does it become an inherited double barrelled name?

If you had a ds, and he got married and had kids, and his wife didn't want to include her name, would his child then be able to drop the extra hyphen?

macneil · 27/08/2007 16:19

To be honest, mine had a bit to do with my name dying out. It's a pretty made up name (de Jewishised) amusingly, so very rare, and my brother almost certainly isn't going to have kids and my dad's sister didn't. It's not actually a very glamorous name, but it works a lot better with her first name.

allgonebellyup · 27/08/2007 16:24

i cant believe this is even an issue.

Who the hell cares if the child has the mother or father's surname?
why should it be the man's surname?

i wish with all my heart that i had given my children MY surname.

FingerInTheMash · 27/08/2007 16:27

PC madness " why is it an issue"

it is an issue, i don't see why it SHOULDn't be an issue. of course if you are married the child should be given the fathers surname - and your sister is a fucktwunt

xXxamyxXx · 27/08/2007 16:35

i prefare my surname to ds dads dont see an issue with keeping mums name thou i went the traditional way depends on the name and who you would offend to reject there family name not worth the hassle

macneil · 27/08/2007 16:39

of course if you are married the child should be given the fathers surname - and your sister is a fucktwunt

Well, that's pretty sound reasoning.

Love, another fucktwunt.

FingerInTheMash · 27/08/2007 17:06

now dear don't wrap comments in facetiousness and pretend it is any better

Dinosaur · 27/08/2007 17:07

Oh bog off whoever you are. Go and find someone else to annoy.

FingerInTheMash · 27/08/2007 17:21

now now Dino, that isn't very nice. I have the often familiar smell of.........cliqueyness in the air. 'Stranger Danger' takes on a different meaning here. Perhaps it should serve as a warning before new people join.

PippiLangstrump · 27/08/2007 17:35

I am sorry but I don't see this as a case of 'stranger danger' just being rude and off the mark.

why not express your opinion in a more polite and respectful way?

FingerInTheMash · 27/08/2007 17:42

I don't want to.

drosophila · 27/08/2007 17:43

On the subject of names I used to know a -

Brian O' Brien and wait for it ...............in the same town a -

Dermot Mc Dermot.

Now perhaps if they had had their mothers surname.........

PippiLangstrump · 27/08/2007 17:44

fair enough.

drosophila · 27/08/2007 17:46

I also know a guy who married a Turkish woman and his surname in Turkish was virtually the same as the Turkish word for 'Shit'.

He changed his name by deed poll but not to her name but to a nice English name.

drosophila · 27/08/2007 17:46

Come to think of it why diidn't he change his name to her surname......

allgonebellyup · 27/08/2007 17:47

Fingerinthemash obviously is just here to piss people off and has no life - so ignore.

Even her opinions sound made-up.

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FingerInTheMash · 27/08/2007 17:50

of course they do dear, that is because they are different

Anna8888 · 27/08/2007 17:55

prettybird - each parent can pass on a maximum of one of his/her two surnames to any children. So any grandchildren will also have a maximum of two double-hyphenated surnames. But that could be their two grandmothers' maiden names, for example.

All children with the same two parents must bear the same surname, so the combination you give your firstborn will hold for any subsequent children of the same two parents.

morningpaper · 27/08/2007 20:06

FingerInTheMash is sooooo a man

What is a bit odd Caroline is that she asked for your opinion. Why is that? Do you have a bit of a frosty relationship and she knew it would wind you up? Does she REALLY want your opinion? It just seems peculiar that she would CARE about your opinion, because it doesn't have anything to do with you. DYKWIM?

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