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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Help!

67 replies

WhereDidThisComeFrom · 26/12/2019 23:42

Shamelessly posting here for traffic.

DD 17 months has a temperature of 40.1 at its highest and 39.4 at its lowest with calpol.

Been doctors. Told viral and to alternate calpol and ibuprofen, but quite honestly it always makes me nervous. So I asked 111/doctors/mum on how to do it and have been told different each time?!

If it matters to this she has been sick, is very lethargic, not at all herself and not eating.

Worried sick as she is my first and she has never been this unwell before.

OP posts:
Clappingforjoy · 26/12/2019 23:43

Take to hospital

Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 26/12/2019 23:47

Took her to out of hours at 7.15 for a half 7 appointment. Was seen at half 8. He as good as admitted his reading seemed to be wrong on her temperature as he could "feel" it (she was burning up) and mine read fine for both me and DH so no reason to question it. He was running behind but I feel rushed out. That said, he did all other checks and had no concerns.

She is currently sleeping (wakes every fifteen minutes for a cuddle and some water) . So I'm unsure whether it would be of any benefit to drag her out once again just to be told the same thing.

I feel like such a failure on not knowing what is best for her

OP posts:
Blanketed · 26/12/2019 23:50

Hospital. Better safe than sorry.

Blanketed · 26/12/2019 23:50

Don't waste anymore time on here. Just go.

cookiemonster5 · 26/12/2019 23:51

Give paracetamol then 2 hours later ibuprofen, 2 hours later paracetamol is what is normally advised.

Ibuprofen is usually 6 hourly and 3 times a day so I usually give both together morning, lunch and bedtime then once the temps aren't so high when waking in the morning I do just paracetamol unless it isn't taking the temp to normal.

gothefcktosleep · 26/12/2019 23:53

It might be tonsillitis. Sounds really similar to what my DDhad a couple of months ago. Admittedly we ended up in hospital for 2 nights and that was down to her breathing - how is she breathing, OP?

Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 26/12/2019 23:56

I did wonder tonsillitis, but he did check all in her mouth/ears/nose. Beyond a bad nose he said all was clear.

Breathing is steady, no dip in chest.

Beyond being clearly unwell there are no warning signs and I am usually a panic wart and assume the worst.

She was sick when we got home but we did admittedly give her calpol not long before her bottle and that has happened before.

OP posts:
Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 26/12/2019 23:58

I'm checking her temperature and currently it has gone down to just a fever rather than a high fever.

I plan to sit up and basically stare and check on her. Do I wake her to give her ibuprofen or let her sleep? She had calpol at nine. She hasn't really slept for two nights now, I'm not sure if I would be right to wake her?

OP posts:
pigsDOfly · 27/12/2019 00:01

I'd be taking her to local A&E.

Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 27/12/2019 00:01

Really can't think straight. Currently 17 weeks pregnant. Exhausted. DH called exW to ask what to do re: what is best for the SC as hearing viral we worried we could risk them catching the same. Now that has kicked off.

I just feel like everything is failing and I just clearly don't know what to do.

OP posts:
pigsDOfly · 27/12/2019 00:03

Ah, just seen you're update.

Yes, maybe a better idea in that case to just keep a watch.

Hope she stays like that.

cittigirl · 27/12/2019 00:04

Take dd to hospital, trust your instinct.

gothefcktosleep · 27/12/2019 00:05

I would wake her up for her medicine. If she’s improving then that’s a great sign.

Simply go by: if in doubt, go to A&E. you know your baby better than anyone else.

cittigirl · 27/12/2019 00:06

If shes being sick, they can give her a pessary I think

tobeornottobe1 · 27/12/2019 00:07

www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng143/informationforpublic

fllinn · 27/12/2019 00:09

Trust your instinct. If you feel like things aren't 'right' and that she needs help now, go direct to A&E. You know her best and are best placed to decide if she is 'normal' poorly or desperately unwell. Don't let anyone overrule you.

Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 27/12/2019 00:13

Sickness has only been the once and that was after an error on our part on giving calpol too close to a bottle. Since then no sickness.

Just woke briefly for a cuddle and went back down.

I will give her ibuprofen the next time she wakes which is likely within the next half hour max. If not by then I will wake her for it. Then would calpol be two hours after that?

I know I sound ridiculous but numbers aren't my strong suit and I have diagnosed ocd and anxiety so the fear of messing this up and making her worse is very real to me.

I feel like the worlds worst mum/step mum right now. Feels like this is all stuff people should just know and grasp and instead I'm panicking while singing "you're welcome" as it's her favourite song and snuggling her when she wakes.

OP posts:
Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 27/12/2019 00:14

Thing is as much as I do know her "best" I am also prone to panicking and assuming the worst. If we hadn't already seen the doctor and had them confirm just viral I would very much be at ane right now with her. But having a professional say that although she is far from okay she is "stay home and medicate okay" it puts me off.

Mainly for her sake, as surely if it is a stay home and medicate situation the last thing she needs is to be dragged out again.

OP posts:
gothefcktosleep · 27/12/2019 00:21

I guess I would monitor her for next 4-6 hours and if her temp continues to drop and you see an improvement on how she is in herself then those are all good signs for treat at home. If she seems to get worse get yourselves to the hospital. Hopefully she will be feeling much better after a good sleep xx

Sorry I’m not sure on the calpol, also rubbish with numbers!

Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 27/12/2019 00:25

I'm mainly scared she will have a fit. I've read that is possible with fluctuations in temperature on the higher end and my mum confirmed the same happening to me.

Currently held up in the room next to ours (she is in with us) with a video monitor and constant checks.

Need the light on to stay alert myself but also want to be near her.

Last couple nights I've had her in bed with me, but I worry now her temperature is so high my body heat will heat her further. So trying my best to keep her in her own cot as much as possible so she cools as much as she can.

Completely dramatic on my part but I am absolutely terrified of something happening. In the best of nights I wake to check her breathing at least three times. Dealing with the first bad illness is a whole new hurdle.

Understand now so much when my granddad used to say to me when little he wishes he could just take my illness from me and keep it for himself

OP posts:
TreadLightly3 · 27/12/2019 00:26

I would also trust your instincts and take her to hospital. Nothing bad will happen if she’s fine and you were unnecessarily worried, but at least you’ll have peace of mind. Hope she is well again soon xx

gothefcktosleep · 27/12/2019 00:32

It’s totally normal, she’s your precious baby.

I co-sleep with mine. Makes me feel better to hear her snoring. Just keep the blankets away from her if you’re concerned about her being too hot. At least you’ll get some rest too If she’s in with you.

managedmis · 27/12/2019 00:32

Has she been drinking?

Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 27/12/2019 00:33

I will be giving her ibuprofen within the next 20 minutes. Then will check her temperature every 15 minutes for the hour after. If it hasn't stayed to just fever, I will be waking DH to drive us to the hospital.

Yet another note of me needing to learn to drive. Yet another failure.

DH has work very early and doesn't handle being woken well. Especially if I state why and it counters the doctors advice. To be fair to him he knows I likely panic far too much.

But if anything changes moans or not he will be getting up and taking us or at least I'll be getting a cab.

No one ever tells you just how scary being a mum can be. Or lonely. All I want right now is to know I'm doing the right thing and a bit of support.

All while I am well aware I am dramatic and over panicking over this. Her temperature HAS lowered for now. She is settled. She has been checked. Just ergh!

OP posts:
Original poster
WhereDidThisComeFrom · 27/12/2019 00:35

Not a lot drink wise, but enough to get her through. Usually she is known as the dustbin as she devours any drink/food within her grasp. But nappies have been steadily wetter since adding a bit of juice. I make her take a few sips each time she wakes.

I dread the day she moves into her own room. I rely on her little fidgets and snores to get me through! I do love a cosleep with her, but jesus is she a fidget. DH usually escapes to the sofa so we have a double bed to ourselves yet I still end up on the edge with a little foot kicking me or heavy breathing in my ear. And despite the lack of sleep, I love every bloody minute of it.

OP posts: