Xmas dinner seating arrangements AIBU?

[KindergartenKop]

Men get the seats with arms, women sit near the hatch to help with the food. Aibu to bring up the patriarchy?

Not today maybe.

Why do men need seats with arms?

It is so they can drape their cocks over them and keep them off the floor? Trip hazzard...

YANBU. How ridiculous.

Help with food means you plate up yours first right? Taking the crispiest roasties etc? And they're on wash up? Not worth a row but I'd make sure that happened.

Is that actually what's been planned or is it coincidence? If it's intentional because of serving duties then of course YANBU.

My dh would swap with me. Do you have a male ally you could swap with?

I'm currently in the kitchen with MIL and all the men are in the living room watching a movie... That's now how it would be in my house.

I wouldn't cause a row over it on Christmas day to be honest.

Just sit down

You mean the head of the table arrangement? In my almost 60 years never stuck to that, other than my father sitting at the head (but no arms on that chair).
I hate chairs with arms but the head of the table is also nearest the door in any house I've been in. Usually the cook takes it as they carve and need to get up and down. My husband did the Christmas dinner cooking normally so he was the one going back and forth. Today it's my sister (only guy will be my teenage son) so she'll take the head position.

Meh, I wouldn't. Lose sleep over it, some people are old fashioned like that, it wouldn't be a game changer for me.

My fil does literally nothing at Christmas apart from buy one gift for mil and buy the wine; doesn’t lift a finger to help. I have to bite my tongue and accept that it’s none of my business and the fact that my DH does his fair share is my business

Fair enough. The men need a rest before they do the dishes, clean the Christmas mess, look after the kids and serve the women drinks all evening

Yes you would be unreasonable and very rude.

If you don't like the seating arrangements your host chooses (and I don't blame you) then don't eat there again.

I would be bloody fuming, I've worked hard to get somewhere in a men only aspect of my industry suffering a lot of abuse from men as a result and then be relegated to serving hatch duties with the other women.
I'd be asking the men if they want to help to serve food because I'm not their fecking maid. Christmas or no Christmas.

It’s really rude, and I’d probably stay home next year. Women aren’t the help.

Yes, cause a fuss. Do it for the wimmin.

I’m joking btw.

Fuming? “I’d stay at home” FFS.

NoSauce

What? 🤷🏻‍♀️ I don’t go to people’s homes so I can serve their male relatives, or mine for that matter.

Don’t cause a fuss, but just sit in one of the good seats

Boy, girl, boy, girl here

YANBU.

More fool the women for perpetuating the status.

What? 🤷🏻‍♀️ I don’t go to people’s homes so I can serve their male relatives, or mine for that matter

Me neither.