Aibu to be getting creeped out by MIL
Sillyscrabblegames · 23/12/2019 23:33
I've posted before about my mil using me as a diary secretary and communicating through me with her son my dh and the kids. I've managed to wriggle out of that habit which I found really stifling by referring everything to dh and she has stopped chasing me now. But we have a new thing.
My mil is now writing me letters and messaging me every week about her issues. All the communication is with me, she makes zero effort to contact her son or grand children, and the content of these messages is about her outings and visits with other family members. So for example she will send me a long message or even a letter one day about an issue she has or an issue family members on dh side have, and then the next day another message or letter will follow explaining how a family member has resolved it for her and her feelings on this and how we don't need to get involved.
I really don't get what this is all about but I know it's weird and frankly it's annoying me. I feel like she is clumsily using me in some odd attention seeking behaviour. Am I missing something. Is this a secret mil thing I was unaware of.
Am I being unreasonable?AIBU
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Sillyscrabblegames · 23/12/2019 23:47
I'm just replying that's lovely or hope you get that sorted, that kind of thing. Perhaps she is being friendly so I don't want to be rude back but it is getting peculiar now.
I don't even acknowledge the letters but I have passed them to dh and he has.
ReanimatedSGB · 24/12/2019 00:13
Doesn't matter if someone's family or not, if they are constantly whining for attention, the best way to deal with them is to ignore as much as you can get away with. Forward the emails etc straight to your H and leave it up to him to deal with his tiresome mother.
rhubarbarkle · 24/12/2019 01:01
Well it's probably not the normal way people communicate these days, but taking the positive view, she likes you and trusts you enough to tell you these things. Maybe no-one listens to her (but bear in mind, there may be a reason for that). On the negative she may see you as a 'soft touch" i.e. you won't be confrontational with her and are generally a kind, supportive person. I know it is annoying, but I'd throw in the odd reassuring word here and there and just let it play out. Does it really interfere with your life that much?
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