I'm thinking in laws are wrong and DH should stay home?

[vommanchristmas]

DH has just come down with the stomach bug that's been going around. Throwing up, diarrhoea and fever etc. He's in bed acting like he's the first person ever to be sick .--

Father in law just popped over to give ds a loaf of banana bread and see how dh was. I told him that other people that have had this gave said it's about a 10 hour thing so he should be ok by tonight.

Fil said "ok well we'll see you tomorrow morning!" It's a family tradition that another family member has a huge Christmas Eve brunch. There's usually between 15-40 people depending on the year.

I was surprised and said 'oh even if he's better I don't think we'll be going, he'll still be contagious.'

Fil told me I'm being ridiculous and if people are going to get it they'll get it. I think he thought I was trying to get out of going. (I'm not I was actually really looking forward to it.)

I said "well it's up to dh but I'll be advising him not to go, I don't want to be the family that makes the entire town (that hasn't had it yet) sick for Christmas."

Apparently I'm being unkind to dh it's not fair for him to miss out.

If I was sick today there's no way I'd go and probably infect everyone. Am I being a bit ott as fil says? If so I won't suggest to dh that he doesn't go.

YANBU.

My DS vomited at my parents last night, I brought him home instead of letting him stay overnight. He was last sick at 12midnight but won't be leaving the house until Christmas day with him, to ensure he is fully clear

Could have been reflux? If I'm reacting badly to something I've eaten I might be sick.

I hope he gets FIL (and only FIL) Ill

He does have a ridiculous gag reflex. Him and his Mum both puke at the drop of a hat. She saw my dog eat one of her cat's poos once and immediately throw up. Dh will throw up if he sees cat sick or poo.

YANBU I wouldn’t be happy if I was hosting or attending and someone showed up within 24 hours of puking or having the shits.

Well if he is contagious it will be a Christmas to remember.

Can you message other people who are attending the event? Saying that DH has been ill and you just wanted to let people know in case anyone had young children / is immunosuppresed / doesnt want to risk it.

Yanbu at all OP. My dh is immunocompromised and I think your dh and his family are really out of order in suggesting that he still goes to the party. I'm sure none of those people fancy being sick over Christmas and new year!

Oh FFS. It is becoming more and more likely-sounding that this man doesn't actually have anything contagious - he ate a dodgy meal, chucked it up, exaggerated because he's a drama llama/attention-seeker and that's the end of it.
I wonder if OP wants to punish him for attention-seeking by spoiling his Xmas day and that's why she's making a fuss? Understandable-ish, but not conducive to a happy marriage in the long run...

He hasn’t got a stomach bug. God knows what he’s up to but he ain’t ill.

Having said that - throwing up once and feeling better 3 hours later isn't norovirus, so probably no need to quarantine him...

He may have a bug, he may not. Perfectly possible for it to be either.

Sounds like he’s determined to go though, so I guess you’ll just have to hope.

Of course I don't want to spoil his Christmas Day! Jesus, our relationship would have to be in a pretty bad place to do that to anyone! I get annoyed at him being a baby when he's ill but I do actually like the man!

I was making a fuss because he was acting like he was really sick and I was genuinely worried he'd infect others, he's now bouncing around having a snowball fight with ds.

If it were me I'd still not go tomorrow just in case it was a stomach bug but I've said my piece and can't do anymore than that.

I do know his sister will go absolutely mental if she finds out, she suffers very badly from health anxiety (for herself and her two kids). She's actually kept them off of nursery for almost a month because of fear of getting ill.

YANBU I think he's extremely selfish to go.

Yes, you can do more.
Next time he's ill, ignore him.
Tell him if he's contagious he could kill somebody, I bet this isn't the only thing he's selfish about.

Oh FFS. It is becoming more and more likely-sounding that this man doesn't actually have anything contagious - he ate a dodgy meal, chucked it up, exaggerated because he's a drama llama/attention-seeker and that's the end of it.

This with bells on.

He clearly felt once you stated that if he was 'really' ill that he would be unreasonable to go to his family brunch he is suddenly realised he could not pretend to be ill any longer.

A simple flu killed my FIL. He was 62. People who go around knowingly spreading virusses should be at the very least heavily fined if you ask me.

Yanbu

Saw DSIL last christmas eve. About an hour or so in she casually mentioned she was just getting her appetite back as she had had a tummy bug the day before and that day. I got sick Christmas day evening and was a write off on boxing day. Cheers for that.

It could well be that your husband recovered quickly, because he is still relatively young and healthy. People who are older or don't have a strong immune system might not be so lucky.

It would be better for you all to stay home, since all of you could be infected. And you don't know how long the incubation period for this thing is.