Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not have to take and pick them up from school today?

65 replies

Greggers2017 · 17/12/2019 09:29

I have 2 children in year 7 at secondary school dd12 and dsd11. I am currently on maternity leave so I have been taking them to school and picking them up since they started in September. I have also been taking two of their friends who live on the same estate as us.
Yesterday and today my two have been off school poorly with the flu type bug and sickness. Yesterday as it was short notice I still took the two friends.
Yesterday evening DD messaged her friends saying they would both be off school again today.
At 8:25 today one of the friends mums messaged me through Facebook asking where I was. I said I wasn't taking them today as my two were off I'll and dd had informed her dd last night. She sent a snotty message saying that her dd would be late now.
I'm now quite annoyed but also feel bad. The school is a 2.5 mile walk away. There is a bus too the school that children can pay for. And friend also has a bike so could have cycled. Added to that friends Mum drives but says she doesn't like getting her baby up to take them. I have a baby too so see that as irrelevant.
Should I have still taken them?

OP posts:
Gibbonsgibbonsgibbons · 17/12/2019 10:05

Yikes! YANBU

As you’ve done a term of drop offs can you confirm with her that she will be doing the drop offs for next term? Hmm

NataliaOsipova · 17/12/2019 10:05

Reply - “Apologies for any misunderstanding. To avoid any future misunderstandings, I think it would be better if we each stick to taking our own kids to school after Christmas.” And don’t offer any more lifts!

usernamerisnotavailable · 17/12/2019 10:06

What does she do for you to reciprocate?

Original poster
Greggers2017 · 17/12/2019 10:06

On the two occasions that I have done KIT days I have dropped them off on my way to work and they have got the bus home so they know which one to use

OP posts:
Original poster
Greggers2017 · 17/12/2019 10:07

@usernamerisnotavailable nothing. I take them as I'm going that way anyway. Other friend got the bus today no
Problem

OP posts:
OlaEliza · 17/12/2019 10:11

I think YABU to take secondary age kids to school at all.

And at only 2.5m as well 😂

Original poster
Greggers2017 · 17/12/2019 10:15

@OlaEliza well as they are my children and the weather is awful at the moment I don't see why it's so funny to you.
After working fill time for the last 6 years I'm enjoying taking my children to school and picking them up.

OP posts:
Whoops75 · 17/12/2019 10:15

Does she bring them home?

She’s very cheeky to expect anything!!

If my neighbor did this for me I would be so grateful and never give out.

jinglebelldogs · 17/12/2019 10:25

Yanbu and I wouldn't be taking her again

Glitterblue · 17/12/2019 10:27

You were more than kind to take them yesterday, never mind today. We used to get lifts to school with a friend (the school wasn't in walking distance, DH uses the car for work and there were no buses at the right time) and if her kids were ever off, she didn't ever say she'd still take us even when it was short notice and I would never have expected her to! This person could take them herself, she is just being lazy and entitled.

Original poster
Greggers2017 · 17/12/2019 10:46

It's never been a formal arrangement I just take them as I'm taking my eldest two anyway and I have a big enough car.

OP posts:
Paddy1234 · 17/12/2019 11:09

She's being a CF
Just take yours - I loved taking my children to school - I found out everything that was happening to them, what homework and generally what was going on in there lives. Yes

DecemberSnow · 17/12/2019 11:11

No way. Cheeky cow !!!!

Spied · 17/12/2019 11:17

Agree with others.
No more lifts.
DD will have to meet her friend at school.

QueenoftheBiscuitTin · 17/12/2019 11:18

Will she be doing the lifts next term?

TreeTopTim · 17/12/2019 11:18

From now on I wouldn't be taking her child.

BigRedBoat · 17/12/2019 11:18

The easy response to the CF mum is 'I won't be providing lifts for your DC anymore'.

WorraLiberty · 17/12/2019 11:21

I don't know why anyone is driving anyone to school. Surely getting the bus is good for their independence?

But it sounds like miscommunication anyway.

WhoTheFuckIsGail · 17/12/2019 11:22

Nope, no more lifts. Cheeky cow!

Pfefferkuchen · 17/12/2019 11:25

I was going to write that you should have told the mother, not just the child but Her dd did tell her about having no lift. Her dd thought her mum would take her but her mum was still expecting me to show up

fuck that
is she, as MN would put, on glue?

Willow2017 · 17/12/2019 11:29

Bu it it sounds like miscommunication anyway.
No.its not she knew about it but still expected op to drag her own baby out to take her kids to school so she didn't have to get dressed.

rhubarbcrumbles · 17/12/2019 11:33

She's very rude and expecting too much. I think I'd have told her myself rather than your DD doing it just to make sure that the message got through from the CF's DD to the CF.

Witchend · 17/12/2019 11:39

You totally should have to take them to school today and you were very nice yesterday to do it.

But it isn't necessarily CF if could be a misinterpretation.
You told your dd to contact her dd who told her dm who phoned you.
There's plenty of places for misunderstanding there.
It could be your dd wasn't clear. Could be her dd wasn't clear. Could be her dd was hoping that she'd get the day off so pretended you'd still be coming, could be she didn't tell her dm until too late, could be her dm was being cheeky.

For example: If your dd sent a message along the lines of "we'll be off school again on Tuesday like today" they might have taken it as her saying that like "today" my mum will happily give you a lift in.

Witchend · 17/12/2019 11:51

Not have to take them to school! Vital word missed out of that first sentence. Sorry Blush

EpcotForever · 17/12/2019 11:53

I'm mean and wouldn't offer any more lifts, although not sure if this would affect your dd and dsd friendships with them.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.