Things you don't like about Christmas

[lorettalemon]

I know lots of other people must find it a stressful time - family dramas, having to see in-laws if you don't like them, getting food in, feeling obliged to go to things, the extra expense. If you don't like Christmas what are the things that bother you/you dread?

.... I do like Boxing Day sales as that's when I get stuff for me 😄😄🎉

The wanton excess in every aspect.

I don’t like the assumption people have, of Christmas being significant to everybody.

Not everybody celebrates Christmas. Or has a tree. Or exchanges presents.

‘

'Christmas' being available in the shops from October. Fucking October!

Buying gifts for people who I barely see/speak to but have a ridiculous present exchange thing going on. Subsequently trying to find a time to exchange gifts in person which has, in the past, meant doing it in February. Massive stress about having no clue what to buy as we have drifted apart. Awkward. #notmyfuckingfaultthoughisiteh?

My parents not coming for Christmas day because 'you'll want to have your own family Christmas now'. Which really means we don't want to drive an hour there and back (fair enough) but we will also refuse your offer of staying overnight.

MIL coming every fucking Christmas which means we can't go to my parents for Christmas day, not that they fucking want us there on Christmas day anyway (see above).

This year a new entry ... Christmas cards. Still haven't done them. Got the list down to about 12 over the years. Have received 2 so far. Nobody gives a fucking shit. Tempted to send them this year with a note to say it's the last time but am left feeling guilty for even thinking that.

What else?

The fact that it's not the 80s/90s and no one will give a fuck about sitting down to watch a film together after dinner because everyone has their own tablet/phone and/or has seen all of the films being shown on TV because of Netflix/prime/a.n.other streaming service/they are all selfish cunts.

That I won't have an alcoholic drink on Christmas morning when opening the presents because kids too young to drink, MIL doesn't drink and DH not bothered. I want a fucking Baileys you boring bastards.

The - without fail - comments from MIL about number of presents from my family for DC. Jeeeez just let it go. For the love of the sweet baby Jesus WE KNOW they buy too much stuff. Just fucking leave it for one pissing year would you?

My inability to control my food and drink intake usually resulting in acid stomach with massive bloating and wondering if my lack of periods is nothing to do with being menopausal and everything to do with being 9 months pregnant but not knowing it.

Decorating the whole fucking house. Time consuming and fucking boring. Don't even get me started on the undecorating.

The wrapping.

The utter disappointment of yet another Christmas where I look like a Christmas pudding in anything I think I might like to wear over the festive period.

Not having a second toilet.

The shittyness of the chocolate. UnQuality Street more like. Another thing we can blame Trump for.

I used to LOVE Christmas. WTF happened?

God that was cathartic

Apologises to those not seeing the paragraphs. I did put them in.

I'd like to send a hug to all the PPs who find Christmas difficult, or who will be alone, or missing a deceased loved one.
Our minister has a special, separate Christmas service every year which is called "Quiet Christmas". It's deliberately gentle, quiet and low key, for people having a tough time and unable to feel festive, and it's followed by tea and mince pies with supportive members of the main congregation who will listen, and provide pastoral care, fellowship and sympathy.
I think sometimes the frenetic noisy commercialised tat and tinsel of a modern Christmas swamps the important core message of the celebration - which is all about God's incarnation as a child in a simple stable, giving himself to us in infinite love, despite knowing that we would reject, crucify and kill him.
That one amazing, humbling gift is all that matters at Christmas. The rest is window dressing and not worth exhausting yourself over.

Crikey PeriCpmoToes.
For me, it's people getting only way and holding me up!
I just want to get to work and back but with the increase of traffic my journey is now twice as long!!
Christmas itself doesn't bother me. I've always refused to either host or go to anyone else's on Xmas or boxing day.
I prefer going to the pub.😁

I’m not a fan of any of it. I don’t care too much for traditions and would gladly do something different each year.

No one needs more stuff, but won’t agree to setting a modest budget/secret Santa or no gift pact.

I usually get Xmas and boxing day off only (NHS) so it barely feels like a break and the lead up/aftermath is carnage at work.

Don’t massively care for Christmas music or food. I do enjoy spending time with family but we see them quite a bit during the year as it is so doesn’t feel like a “special” occasion .

It feels like there a lot of pressure (as PPs have said) to be really into the festive spirit & I just don’t get it. Especially not this year post the awful election result

Being pressured to go to parties you dont want to. No I m not going to be the designated driver sitting nursing an orange juice all night while everyone gets pissed and silly.
One year I left a party at a local pub and sneaked home to cuddle up with the cats in front of the Inbetweeners . Loved it.
The stupid kissing on NYE. Go away and dont slobber your cold germs on me.
Having to explain I dont eat meat and no I m not going to have turkey "because it's Christmas ".
People getting drunk and maudlin on hogmanay. There s always the one who s crying in the kitchen.

Desperately wanting a 'perfect Christmas' like the ones in the adverts, only to end up having a day full of tension and trying to stop any arguments that look like theyre about to start over dinner. Why do I always feel like I'm the one who has to make the day perfect and if it's not, then blame myself.

I'm finding this thread very cathartic too.
Most have already been mentioned but for me:
The run up his hectic and stressful.
The fact Christmas starts in shops in bloody August/September.
The fact shops are clearing it away before its even begun and usually stocking the shelves with the next gimmick by Boxing Day.
The DC school expects you to be an endless fountain of time, resources and money.
I have autistic DC who find Christmas difficult. Buying presents for them is very specific and a lot of pressure. It's stressful not joyful watching them open presents.
DC are picky eaters and won't eat a Christmas dinner.
I have IBD and can't enjoy rich food and live in fear of flare ups.
I get paranoid that I will get ill and ruin Christmas (someone else upthread mentioned this and I'm glad I'm not alone.)
Difficult family on both sides. Forced to spend time with both. I dread it.
Overbearing parents.
Feeling claustrophobic in a small house with too many people cooped up bored and no routine.
Coping with DC alone whilst DH works over the holidays.
I never feel good enough.
I hate the clutter and waste.
People ignoring me when I ask them not to buy loads of the stuff the DC don't want. Then I'm left dealing with the unwanted clutter and chaos.
I don't now what Christmas means anymore apart from huge consumerism and I feel I need to get that back somehow.

All of it.

Even if I want to opt out there is no escaping the forced jollity.

The consumerism...love the food and drink though.

I work in retail, depending on the days you normally work, you might be working until 8pm on christmas eve then back in on boxing day at 8am!
All that preperation, for one day off!
Also the sheer volume of food and drink customers buy is frankly quite ridiculous, all that rich food! And as soon as its the new year all the diet, detox shite is on special offer.
It feels like we’re puppets to the food industry!!

Ooh, thank you. Here goes....

Being expected to travel half the length of the country every single Christmas, regardless of what we might want.

Being expected to take three trains in each sodding direction, with usual luggage plus presents plus a heavy medical device, like it's no effort at all.

Family not noticing that we do all that without complaining, despite our multiple chronic health and pain conditions.

Family sometimes asking about DH's wellbeing but never, ever mine.

Family refusing to understand or acknowledge that I can't socialise five days in a row.

Dark frowns if we want to spend any time with non-family... But being yelled if I attempt any conversation when the deafening sodding TV is on.

Happily, family usually have alcohol readily available...

All of it.

The fact that for three months of the year, it's not possible to go into shops without Christmas being shoved down your throat. The fact that there is no escape from the bloody Christmas songs everywhere - the same ones, every year, over and over and over. The fact that there is so much discussion about it for such ages beforehand.

And then having to do the damn thing. The tedious stressful travelling and traffic hold-ups. The stressful impossibility of finding yet another present for people you (well, I at least) having been buying for for an entire long lifetime. I'm dreading it this year. I wish to God I didn't have to do sodding Christmas yet again. It hangs over my December and makes me miserable. I'd be so incredibly happy if it were abolished.

Also, I think retail workers must probably suffer from an as-yet-unnamed condition at this time of year. They have to. Listening to Christmas music, all day, every day, on loop, must be enough to drive the saintliness saint an extra-special type of loopy.

I dread emails that ask me to hand out ideas of what my kids would like for Christmas. 1. Ask them yourself! 2. Any ideas I had I already used myself. 3. If you can't think what to get them, just give money!

Stresses me out.

1. Was totally guilty of this before I had kids and I profusely apologize to everyone.

Also, Thanksgiving is like Christmas, but no presents, which is why I love Thanksgiving as a holiday but hate hate Christmas where every year we MUST celebrate at my mother's too tiny house in her too tiny living room where, last year, I had to gather a committee together and deputize myself as spokesperson to request that I be allowed to move the thermostat from 75 F down to something that wouldn't cause me to faint from heat exhaustion.

Why do old people keep their house at 75 F in the winter? I thought they were all supposed to be frugal from being children of the Depression.

Also, being asked which church service we went to and what did the children wear to church, did they wear new outfits, when really we didn't go and if we had it would have been jeans or black jeggings as my girls don't wear dresses and neither do I. And they don't have "outfits".

Don't enjoy wrapping presents. Get dog fur all over the tape and start to understand why rich people have a separate room just for wrapping paper and wrapping of presents because doing it on the bed full of dog fur is not ideal.

Trying to make sure presents are even fair and just amongst the children, factoring in price, value, was something on sale, if one kid gets a particular item, are the other two going to cry foul if they don't get something of exactly the same value, will one child who gets something of high value be disappointed they got less gifts or do I have to up the quantity with some cheaper items so they have an even number of gifts to open.

I do love Grown-up Christmas List sung by Amy Grant. But not in November.

If I were in charge, there'd be Christmas songs allowed only from December 1st through December 26th. Any other airings would be fined and prosecuted. 😬

I just want to do my house up and instead I can't get a thing done. Any money I could spend on the house is being spent on crap -presents that people don't need, food that I don't really need but feel I should eat etc. I'm seriously looking forward to January.

The fact that it's supposed to be all about love and togetherness so if you're already solitary and lonely, life seems even worse.

I have fewer presents to buy every year. I'm less than thrilled about saving money that way.

I’m NC with my Mum, all my siblings go there.

My Dad and step Mum live the opposite end of the country and visit on 1st December as “we like it to be just us at Christmas” what like every fucking day of the year

My Grandparents are elderly and go to my Uncles house who is a racist, homophobic misogynistic twat who I can’t stand, he’d up with my Grans trifle on his head if I went there

I have my DC and they’re wonderful but no extended family to have over or to and visit and it’s a bit shit.

Buying presents for family and children just because it's Christmas - no-one actually needs anything (very fortunate I know) so it really is buying for the sake of it.

The fact that I do it all (including buying my own present this year...).

The overindulgence and feeling "full" for days on end

The sheer hype and stress involved for 1 day.

I love spending time with family and friends but Christmas Day itself always feels like a bit of an anticlimax and I feel guilty for not feeling "Christmassy".

Perfect family adverts. My husband said once "these people don't even know each other, they're actors". The "but this and you'll be as happy as us" pressure annoys me.

I find Christmas stressful, after a bereavement, but I've found that, just taking one event at a time, not looking at the whole month, really helps. I find it overwhelming.

Also, Christmas to me is a celebration of the shortest day - the only way is up, after Saturday, we'll be gaining 2 minutes of sunshine a day - that's 14 minutes a week!