There’s SO much to do!

[tired206]

I’ve had a few days off work and have spent it cleaning the ground floor of my house and ordering lots of things to prepare for Christmas. I’ve been buying stuff like new rugs, a doormat and scented candles just to make the house look nicer and more comfortable. I still have so much to do but am 19 weeks pregnant and am feeling so rundown and exhausted. On my list:

• Vacuum and mop all floors (did this two days ago but they’re messy again)
• Clean out fridge and do online food shop
• Book dentist for me and DH (it’s been years since our last appointment)
• Finish buying Christmas presents for family from local shops
• Buy new glassware
• Clean bathroom
• Get a couple of paintings framed and hung
• Look into different types of cat food and order (fussy cat has gone off usual brand)
• Collect new glasses from optician
• Dress house for Christmas - including buying tree and more baubles
• Look at how best to hang new Christmas lights in window
• Generally ensure house stays tidy and clean on a day-to-day basis
• Buy and send Christmas cards to friends who’ve sent them to us - maybe don’t send to those who haven’t!
• Wrap presents for family
• Buy new clothes (hardly any of my old stuff fits me now I’m 19 weeks)
• Clear out airing cupboard on landing which is currently full of old tile samples, paint and lots of other junk
• Do ruthless declutter of other rooms that need it
• Source and bug pretty vintage fruit bowl for kitchen table to store loose fruit
• Hold down day job in the meantime (am back to work on Tuesday afternoon)

AIBU to feel totally overwhelmed by all this? Will my house ever be organised and “done”? It just feels never ending!

None of those jobs are huge. Make a start and get your partner to help.

Does you husband have other chores he usually does (not on the list) or can he do some of these? I know when I was pregnant we split the jobs between us by 'can easily do while pregnant' for me and 'not easily done while pregnant' for my boyfriend. This kept the house jobs split pretty evenly between us, just made my life easier while pregnant :)

Also a lot of these don't seem urgent (e.g. clearing the airing cupboard and the fruit bowl haha) can they wait until after Christmas?

Decide what needs to be done before Xmas. Then outsource some things if possible (get a cleaner). See if you can buy a secondhand maternity bundle locally (cheap and easy). Online shop watching tv this evening.

That list needs dividing into: must do; would like to have done; really can wait until after Christmas.

My suggestions would be:

Must do

• Online food shop
• Finish buying Christmas presents for family from local shops
• Clean bathroom
• Collect new glasses from optician
• Wrap presents for family
• Buy new clothes (hardly any of my old stuff fits me now I’m 19 weeks)
• Hold down day job in the meantime (am back to work on Tuesday afternoon)
• Look into different types of cat food and order (fussy cat has gone off usual brand)

Would be nice to do

• Vacuum and mop all floors (did this two days ago but they’re messy again)
• Clean out fridge
• Dress house for Christmas - including buying tree and more baubles
• Look at how best to hang new Christmas lights in window
• Generally ensure house stays tidy and clean on a day-to-day basis
• Buy and send Christmas cards to friends who’ve sent them to us - maybe don’t send to those who haven’t!
• Buy new glassware

Really can wait

• Get a couple of paintings framed and hung
• Book dentist for me and DH (it’s been years since our last appointment)
• Clear out airing cupboard on landing which is currently full of old tile samples, paint and lots of other junk
• Do ruthless declutter of other rooms that need it
• Source and buy pretty vintage fruit bowl for kitchen table to store loose fruit

Yes, YABU. Most of that is self-inflicted. Relax a bit.

Houses are never ‘done’. Be half those jobs don’t need doing right now.

Surely your DH can do some of them.

Why cant you split this list with your dh?

Most of these things don't "have" to be done.
Christmas should be enjoyable.

Do you really have to clear out an airing cupboard 10 days before christmas? Paintings hung? Although the dentist is important , but unless you are having problems a visit can wait until January.
Buying a different brand of cat food isn't a big job- grab a few varieties next time you are in the supermarket.

And brace yourself for years to come when you have a child buzzing around- you will yearn for the easy christmas you have right now- being overwhelmed at having to source a vintage fruitbowl won't even make it onto the list.

What is your OH doing?

You're pregnant. Can't you get someone else to do most of that? You need to buy clothes (do it on line ), pick up your glasses (in case they need adjusting )and holding down the day job. Do stuff on line, delegate some , ignore some . No one send cards anymore!

You should be taking it a bit easier while pregnant and fitting jobs around rest/naps.

I'm not suggesting doing nothing, but pare it down to essentials and get your DH involved in anything manual handling related. Don't go trying to lug trees around or climb up on furniture to faff about with lights.

Thanks @bridgetreilly - that’s made me feel a bit calmer!

DH no help unfortunately... it’s the busiest time of year for his business, when he makes most of his income - and he’s working flat out until the 23rd. So it’s all down to me to sort the house.

You should be taking it a bit easier while pregnant and fitting jobs around rest/naps.

The problem is I can’t stand having an untidy or disorganised home - it makes me feel so stressed. Friends have warned that I will need to lower my standards...

Unless you husband is working 24hours then he has time to do at least a few odd jobs. For example there's no reason he can't throw the hoover around when he gets in from work however often it needs doing (once a week usually for us but I understand with a cat you probably need to do it more frequently)

If you stopped reading/posting on MN you would have more time to tackle these jobs.

Sorry but reading your list, some of these things are hardly worth including as they're so quick to do. You could order a fruit bowl, glassware & photo frames online in 10 minutes. I decorated our tree and hung up lights in about 30 minutes total. And writing down things like 'book dentist appointment' takes the same amount of time as actually booking the appointment itself.
Alternatively, you need to group them into categories: cleaning, online shopping, shopping in person and decorating rather than having one long list
I'm not critising, as I'm also 20 weeks pregnant, have a toddler, work full time and commute a long journey every day, so I know all the jobs can mount up. I just think sometimes lists can paralyze or overwhelm us, when a lot of the smaller items can be done very quickly.

If you stopped reading/posting on MN you would have more time to tackle these jobs.

Very true. I just needed a bit of motivation!

Do you have other children? If your husband is working so much and it's just you at home, the house shouldn't need that much cleaning.

You might struggle to get an online food shop slot for at least the next two weeks! If you shape yourself you might get one for the next couple of days but anything less than a week to Christmas has been booked for six weeks in my area!

Just start with one thing. There’s no point looking at it all because it leads to paralysing overwhelm and nothing gets done. I’d start with something easy. Just one thing for that day. If you have enough energy to do another, that’s great. But it will only work one thing at a time. Personally, I’d start with the online shop and ordering the Christmas tree.

Just start with one thing.

Thanks. I’ve just cleared out and wiped the fridge and thrown out a load of mouldy veg at the back of the drawers. It’s a start!

Yeah a bit more chill is needed. I sympathise, I'm 22 weeks and the mess my 3dc create is giving me rage but I simply can't do it all. Sort your list into essential things as PP said. Sod the rest.

What bridgetreilly said

Some of these are not things that need to be done, at all. Buying new glassware or a pretty vintage bowl surely aren't urgent or important.

Have a look again and see what you can cut out eg wrap presents for family - buy present bags on your online shop instead.

Put some nice things on the list as well eg go out for a nice hot chocolate or something relaxing. Break things down into small steps eg clearing out an entire room is really hard, clearing out a small drawer is a 20 min job. And maybe break it down into days, and just look at what needs doing on that day rather than all the things for all the days.

If it takes less than 3 mins to do - do it straight away. Writing it down takes as long as doing it!

Also aiming for a % of a list done is better than expecting to complete everything!

Drama!!

You don’t have any children FGS
All these jobs are so mild, some nice, others satisfying but absolutely none big

* Look into different types of cat food and order (fussy cat has gone off usual brand)*

In the time it took you type this....