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To find this mildly irritating (another MIL one!)

42 replies

3littlemincemeatpies · 13/12/2019 15:41

We live quite far away from family and for the first time ever it will just be DH and I and 3 DD’s this Christmas, so excited to not have to entertain or be driving the length of county visiting everyone and just enjoying being in our little bubble.

I love all things Christmas and do try to fit everything in, Elf’s, festive cinema trips, wreath making workshops etc, movie night etc. I’m also a SAHM so have no problem of doing the majority of shopping, planning wrapping, set me up with a baileys and A Wonderful life and I’m in my happy place 😂

It is however a busy time and not living close to the girls grandparents means 0 rest bite, adult time or peace and quiet.

MIL has been sending me little messages every day this week saying to expect another parcel for DC, DH etc and always with a “sorry you will have to wrap haha” on top of that also instructions to collect bigger presents click and collect, from various shops then storing and wrapping as well.

Mildly irritating that is only me that gets the texts but still understandable, postage is expensive and makes sense to send it direct for the sake of of being delivered unwrapped and I also know the girls are lucky to have GP’s that send them such nice things however...

What has really gripped my shit is that she has just text me to say that my presents will be arriving wrapped and ready to go straight under the tree aka so DH doesn’t need to worry...

DH is very hands on. He’s is also on leave from Wednesday onwards for 3 weeks and more they capable of wrapping some bastarding presents...

AIBU to tell her next time she texts with another little “job” or “errand” to tell her I’m on bloody strike...?

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?


You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

CoffeeBeansGalore · 13/12/2019 15:52

You are not being unreasonable but it is nice that your dc have gps that actually bother. Could you ask your dh to tell his dm (in a nice chat) that he is at home and can easily pick up anything if she lets him know?


twoshedsjackson · 13/12/2019 15:54

How about letting her know that you passed the message on to her son, seeing he's on leave and happy to step up to the mark? With heartfelt thanks for their kindness, of course!


Disfordarkchocolate · 13/12/2019 15:57

This sort of thing used to annoy me too. First I had to tell people what to buy, then I had to buy it and post it. Now they do cash I much prefer it. Next time suggests she uses Amazons gift wrap option.


TowelStripes · 13/12/2019 16:00



Chunkers · 13/12/2019 16:25

Depending on the age of your DDs, can’t they just open the parcels in the state they arrive in the post. A parcel is a parcel, still exciting to open?


BeanTownNancy · 13/12/2019 16:34

"Many thanks DMIL, I've got your son on it."


NannyPear · 13/12/2019 16:38

YANBU that is a bit ridiculous. I hope she didn't send DHs needing wrapped!


fedup21 · 13/12/2019 16:41


Made me chuckle, tooGrin.

I’d just reply saying thanks but telling her to text DH as he’s in charge of present buying/wrapping etc


HanginWithMyGnomies · 13/12/2019 17:03

Maybe she doesn’t want you to see what the present is? Perhaps she thinks there could be a chance you’d end up collecting it? Sounds like a really thoughtful person to me..


3littlemincemeatpies · 13/12/2019 17:12

Thanks everyone...

I think I will, I did similar when she text me to remind me of DH’s DGF’s Birthday..

What is it with MIL’s thinking their sons aren’t capable of lifting a finger!!

And yes DH’s pressies have all been sent for me to wrap too!! 🤬

OP posts:

Marmitepasta · 13/12/2019 17:13

I think yabu. It is nice that she is buying present for the kids and nice that she have bought and wrapped you present! Be thankful


3littlemincemeatpies · 13/12/2019 17:14

@ That would be fine if she did the same with DH’s presents, doesn’t the same go for him and chance he will see his when they come unwrapped?!

OP posts:

Marmitepasta · 13/12/2019 17:19

I would say get over it. Yes it's mildly annoying but it's probably just that she doesn't want you to see the present in that she knows that you've been to get the rest so will most likely pick up that one too. It's nice of her to send you a present.


HanginWithMyGnomies · 13/12/2019 17:19

@3littlemincemeatpies it does and bang goes my theory :)


ChristmasSpirtsOnTheRocksPleas · 13/12/2019 17:25

Just text back. Oh that’s so lovely! Thank you for sending all of our presents wrapped. I was starting to get really overwhelmed with all the click and collect and wrapping - it was really making me miserable, so glad I don’t have to do it anymore! Thanks so much, you’re a gem xxx


SallyLovesCheese · 13/12/2019 17:29

Definitely let your DH wrap the ones for your kids and send MIL a text thanking her and that "DH is wrapping them now".


Kanga83 · 13/12/2019 17:32

Echo what others have say. Text, say thank you, but you've forwarded the texts for DH to deal with.


niknakpaddywhackqueen · 13/12/2019 17:32

YABU to say 'rest bite' when it's 'respite'


Confusedbeetle · 13/12/2019 17:37

Very ungrateful


NoSauce · 13/12/2019 17:41

I find it hard to believe you rest bite Grin and “little bubble”.


recycledbottle · 13/12/2019 17:43

Wouldnt be annoyed by this. Both sets of grandparents send some money. Wouldn't even occur to them to send actual presents. You are a SAHM so presumably at the house more so she probably was worried you would pick up the package.


Election2019 · 13/12/2019 17:44

The next time she messages just tell her you’ll let DH know so he can collect and wrap, and then repeat every single time.


honeylulu · 13/12/2019 17:44

"Thank you, though not a hope in hell I'll be able to gift wrap everything. I'm just going to put them all in a giant gift bag each for them. We can re use it too, so kinder to the planet as well, what's not to like?"


Drum2018 · 13/12/2019 17:48

@honeylulu great idea.


BackforGood · 13/12/2019 17:49

Fair play, you have said you are only "mildly irritated" by this.
I'm with others who think she is being really thoughtful.
Tbf - you've said you are a SAHM, so I would expect you to be doing the errands in terms of picking them up from a local store too. I don't think that is an unreasonable expectation.
I work PT, but am aware I have 2 days a week more than dh to do stuff like this and would expect it to be my job and not his, as he works 5 days a week.

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