Being blackmailed by my daughters nursery

[Jaded85]

Hi All,

So earlier this week when I was dropping my daughter, who is two, off at nursery, I was told by 4 staff members that they were leaving due to poor treatment by the owner. I was alarmed by this information and spoke to the manager who also said she was ‘going off sick on her notice period and not coming back’ because she’s ‘had enough’. I tried to explain to the manager that this would be really unsettling for the children and questioned if the nursery would still be opening after Christmas as only a couple of staff members remained. She had no answers. I told her that if parents weren’t given clarity then I would have no choice but to report her to ofsted. Once I’d left the nursery I spoke to two other parents at the nursery and they said they had been told the same.
The following day I received a call from the nursery owner and she denied all claims of staff being unhappy with her and said they were all leaving for personal reasons. the conversation ended with her saying my daughters key worker would remain the same and she would not be affected by any changes.
A day later I received another phone call from her asking me to withdraw an alleged complaint I had made to Ofsted, to which I told her that even if I had, I have every right as a parent to do so.
Today I received an email from her containing the following;

‘I have contacted the Local Education Authority Early Years Team and asked for advice and they have said that if you feel you are unable to do this then we are able to terminate your contract with the nursery.’

‘Please can you confirm to me by email that you have updated the regulator with the actual facts as have been explained to you, If I do not receive confirmation then unfortunately I will have no choice but to terminate your daughters place‘

I’m furious!

The thing is, she didn’t tell you to remove your child because the relationship had broken down. She told you that unless you withdrew your complaint to the regulator she’d remove your child’s place. That is different and worrying.

I would remove your child as a matter of urgency. Tell the local authority early years team what has happened; and say you are horrified that the local authority has sought to put pressure on you to withdraw your complaint to the regulator (which is what she is claiming). That’s the big issue here, not the substance of the original complaint.

Also, tell ofsted the same.

Regulators are a vital part of safeguarding. Asking a parent to remove a child because of relationship break down, on appropriate notice, is one thing. Putting pressure on a parent to withdraw a complaint to a regulator is really worrying. Why is she so frightened of a complaint? What might come out? I would conclude from her panicked response that this nursery is not a safe environment.

forward manager's email to Ofsted.

And anyone else you can think of.

*I told her that if parents weren’t given clarity then I would have no choice but to report her to ofsted.

1. Parents have no rights to know why staff are leaving.
2. That above is blackmail. Pot meet Kettle.
3. What the staff said was unprofessional at best. If they've been dismissed for discussing things with parents that they shouldn't then maybe the owner has a point...*

Totally agree with @Witchend in this instance. Why on earth did you threaten OFSTED because staff were leaving?! Not your business! She's made a situation by telling an obvious lie but you clearly scared her into action.

Yup @LolaSmiles.

It makes sense that if a nursery is so bad that you whistleblow to ofsted, then obviously you should also be pulling your child out in disgust at how badly the nursery is failing.
It doesn’t make sense to complain to regulators of violations but think the nursery is still a suitable place for your child.

They are simply calling your bluff of reporting to ofsted.

I think it's unreasonable to complain to Ofsted about a setting and also expect to keep a child going there. either you are confident that the setting is a decent place, with appropriate levels of care, safety and educational opportunities and it was unreasonable to complain, or if the complaint is reasonable then you are very unreasonable to keep your child there.

Lolasmiles
Loved your summary.

OP had already decided to withdraw her child.

Staff morale is clearly shattered and turnover huge. This isn’t a small issue for toddlers. They need routine, consistency, affection and familiar faces. Not a revolving door of newcomers!

honestly I don’t understand what exactly you think you can complain about, staff leave jobs or get fired all the time but that doesn’t mean the ratios will be off or they’ll be short staffed because believe it or not the nursery can actually hire people you know. As for your daughter being unsettled this is the risk you take when you put your child in the nursery, staff will leave, they won’t stay just for your dd.

Also the staff sound like unprofessional gossips. Staffing and matters related to the business should not be discussed with any parent under any circumstances, only matters relating to the parents child should be discussed with them. I run a Performing Arts school and if I had staff discussing my business with the parents (espically saying they didn’t like working for me or my business) I would not be happy, if they weren’t already leaving I would be considering their future with me or if they had already handed me their notice I wouldn’t want to give them a glowing reference.

Turin
Nobody is saying high staff turnover is good for the children. Most people have said it's reasonable for the OP to be concerned elements of the nursery.

What many people are rightly saying is that this isn't an Ofsted issue, and the OP has created this situation by throwing her weight around seeking information she isn't entitled to. Parents threatening Ofsted because they think it makes them sound like they mean business or treating it as some trump card rarely works because in most situations where they do that it's not an Ofsted situation

I encountered one of these nursery owners before. She has a chain of about 4.... Wouldn’t be surprised if it wasn’t the same person.

I pulled my child out the next day.