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AIBU to ask if you talk to your ex about your life?

29 replies

mincepiesandtea1 · 11/12/2019 10:16

How is your relationship with your ex? And if you have a good/ok relationship, do you talk to him about your life or what's happening in your life, or don't you tell him anything?

OP posts:
Sotiredofthislife · 11/12/2019 10:18

No, never. But we have a poor relationship and he is too interested in what I am up to so keeping everything as private as I can has been key.

ChristmasSweet · 11/12/2019 10:22

Why would I? He's an ex for a reason. Doesnt need to know about my life now.

Iamclearlyamug · 11/12/2019 10:23

I have a great relationship with my ex - we speak most days about DD7 and sometimes even just to chat randomly. He knows most things about my life still, we're friends as well as co-parents.

We split acrimoniously after he had a second affair, with a junior colleague half his age. Its taken a long time to get back to 'normal'

People think its really 'weird' that we get on so well, but I think it's best thing possible for our daughter if we can get along without arguments

Hellofromtheotherside2020 · 11/12/2019 10:31

I think it'd depend if children were involved or not

NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace · 11/12/2019 10:32

He's my bestie. And I talk to him often Blush

MotherHeggy · 11/12/2019 10:34

No I don't as his new wife doesn't want him talking to me (according to him) as she thinks I want him back.

NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace · 11/12/2019 10:43

No I don't as his new wife doesn't want him talking to me (according to him) as she thinks I want him back.

Well, I think that there's a bit of that going on too. But my ex and I have been friends for over 35 years and he's only known his latest partner for a few months. So, he makes his own mind up about whom he talks to.

And I definitely don't want him back (we've been separated over 10 years). And even if I did, I wouldn't act on that. I would not do that to another woman.

Lllot5 · 11/12/2019 10:45

I haven’t spoken to mine for must be ten years. Good.

Menora · 11/12/2019 10:45

About children/family things yes. Sometimes work

I like his partner more I talk to her more, I would be friends with her if he would let us 😂

Boom45 · 11/12/2019 10:46

In still friends with a couple of exes so I talk to them about my life as much as I would any other friend.

StormBaby · 11/12/2019 10:50

We get on very well on the surface and everyone comments on how well our set up works, new partners all get on etc. However I called him last night to say he needs to have the kids more on a Saturday as its been very unfair for about 2 years(we have all the kids here every weekend so Dh and I get no couple time at all), and he launched into a 40 minutes long character assassination. Brought up stuff from 10 years ago about our split, saying I need to take responsibility for what I've done and it's all my fault... Ooookkkkaaay then!

eenymeenyminyme · 11/12/2019 10:52

No, I hate having anything to do with him to be honest, he's the Ex for many reasons!

As DD is growing up she's dealing with contact more so one day I'd be happy to not have to speak to him at all.

Goldenchildsmum · 11/12/2019 11:52

We get on ok. But I only speak to him when he needs some help. Twas ever thus Smile

MulticolourTinselOnTheTree · 11/12/2019 11:55

No way. I haven't spoken to him for over a year, and intend to continue ignoring him.

MashedSpud · 11/12/2019 11:59

I haven’t spoken to him in about ten years, thank God.

IMWang · 11/12/2019 12:03

We get on okay but only really speak to him about Dd. We sometimes have a general chat at pick up and drop offs but I don't tell him stuff about my life.

His ex was vile and she absolutely hated me and she would come with him to drop offs and pick ups and sit in the car to make sure he didn't talk to me. Now he's with someone else and she's lovely so he's allowed to stand and chat if he wants to 😂

TheArtfulScreamer1 · 11/12/2019 16:07

I don't have children with my ex but occasionally cross paths with him as I pop in on my ex laws when I'm in the area. We get on fine and will message each other with comiserations or congratulations if there's a major life event that the other becomes aware of but we aren't in regular contact as such and don't message just for a chinwag or catch up.

HideYourBabiesAndYourBeadwork · 11/12/2019 16:11

God no. I can barely stand to make eye contact with him. The feeling is mutual I’m sure. We have a book we are both meant to write in to communicate about the children. He doesn’t bother. But no, no cosy chats between us.

Pollaidh · 11/12/2019 16:13

Don't have children with exes, but get on with almost all of them very well - even the ones I don't maintain a proper friendship with, I meet up with for drinks with friends when I'm in their city, and some of my exes are actually good friends. DH is very happy and babysits so I can go out with them.

FreedomfromPE · 11/12/2019 16:14

Oh he'll no. He was manipulative and fabricated stories to SS. Over time he was improved but I always kept him 'grey rock' and I am glad I have as it transpires he is back to his old tricks and has been attempting to manipulate my husband and I.

FreedomfromPE · 11/12/2019 16:15

I have other exes who are friends though. Never married or lived nor had children with them though. Never was abused by them either.

Rainwilds · 11/12/2019 16:18

Yes, on the odd occasion when we have sex... not particularly in between those times though 😂

ffswhatnext · 11/12/2019 16:22

A couple of them I'm still friends with.
One of my oldest best friends is an ex. We were seeing each other nearly 30 years ago. As partners, we weren't compatible. We talk often and because of distance see each other when we are nearby, unless for a specific reason. We've both faced the accusations and jealousy because you cannot be mates with your ex or someone of the opposite sex.

AppleBlossomTimeNow · 11/12/2019 16:32

We get on really well, spend Christmas & holidays together as a family. He was a mate before we were a couple so I think that helps. Some subjects feel more awkward but as I like, respect & care about him nothing is 'off limits'. He's a great dad too.

doodleygirl · 11/12/2019 16:34

I have a good relationship with my ex as does my DH. DD is now 25 so we dont speak very often but will sit and chat happily when we do.

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