AIBU for the teacher not to use the word Numpty

[Susanne9176]

My son who is 6 used the word numpty and I asked him where he had heard this. He said his class teacher is using this word to describe the children when they've done something a bit silly and has called.h and other children that. Am I over reacting or is that just not ok, she is basically calling them stupid and encouraging the kids to name call

Butchy and WernethWife

Aye, It's funny how calling your best friend or whoever a c**t is a term of huge affection

@zukiecat

You beat me to it

How do you 'support and love' someone who's just knocked a drink over having just been told to be careful?
By not calling them names.
It is exactly the name calling as clumsy is what messed up my life, labelling behaviour, I always felt stupid and gave up, got embarrassed to drink or eat in front of people, fell over fresh air.
My DD has severe dyspraxia, she clearly got it from me though as a child calling me names didn't help me or my confidence.
Maybe teachers should say that wasn't a great choice, or can you behave please.
I know it is in jest but if one child is being called a fucking numpty at home, it is not funny.

Please stop. You are setting your child up for a lifetime of over sensitivity.

I call mine bananas or doughnuts, I suppose I'm encouraging bad eating habits.

Numpty is probably at the bottom of the insult league as it has a bit of affection with it.it's the sort something word you'd use for family and friends if they did something daft.

You are absolutely right, please home-school your child to avoid any further name-calling by teachers. Preferably before I run the risk of encountering you.

I'll pull your arm off and hit you with the soggy end

My Year 4 teacher used to say exactly this. I wonder if it was the same lady (Cumbria?) I hated it actually. The whole class would laugh and I'd feel a bit sick. But then she also used to call me 'the dripping one' because I was dithery and, er, 'highly strung' - maybe she had a point!

I guess it depends where you are from, words like eejit, numpty, muppet, halfwit are very much used where I'm from and wouldn't cause offensive, they are all endearing

halfwit?!?
You can't call a child (or anyone!) that, surely?! No matter where you're from.

I have no issue with numpty.

If they do something daft or incorrect they get support and love not a put down

How do they cope away from home (especially in the playground) where other people point out their mistake and it's expected that they deal with it without "love and support"?

Not being able to laugh at yourself for a minor mistake could lead to an anxious child with perfectionist tendencies if a mild word like numpty makes them feel "put down"?
Mild teasing (you numpty!) is not the same as a put down (you dumb cunt)

Mild teasing (you numpty!) is not the same as a put down (you dumb cunt)
Should a Teacher be teasing? If my boss called me a numpty for making a mistake or spilling my drink, he'd be sorry.
Is it okay in the work place or just school.
Maybe between friends and family.

Emerald - your dd has severe dyspraxia so calling her numpty over a spilt drink is completely inappropriate but there must be other situations when a numpty comment could diffuse a situation when she makes a mistake that she normally doesn't?

numpty is a silly billy, harmless. Eejit means idiot and is offensive

It's on par with silly sausage IMO. Mild tease but with endearment.

*halfwit?!?
You can't call a child (or anyone!) that, surely?! No matter where you're from. *

Why?
Halfwit is the same as numpty where I'm from.

I've called myself, my kids and others numpties. With kids often while dealing with whatever mess or mayhem their numptiness has caused. Mopping up a drink, cleaning a bump or graze etc.

It's not said with hurtful intent and dismisses minor cock ups without creating a huge hooha over it.

I've used it referring to myself when talking to the tot 'Your Mummy's a numpty, she forgot to do xyz'

My children prefer teachers not to be totally formal. They spend a lot of time with these adults and sometimes the teacher or the kids do something silly and my kids prefer a gentle joke to diffuse the situation rather than a formal request to rectify the mistake. I guess it's similar to how I parent. By being serious it kind of makes it into a bigger deal and I think sometimes a lighter tone is more likely to result in them listening to me.

I think it helps kids establish the boundaries between acceptable and unacceptable banter when adults aren't in earshot too (I'm mainly thinking of the school playground here)

If my boss called me a numpty for making a mistake or spilling my drink, he'd be sorry.

I'd laugh if my headteacher called me one, but then I have a very good and fairly informal relationship with her, along with the rest of my colleagues. If she was calling me a numpty it would most likely because I had been - and it would mean she was just teasing, it was nothing major and it was just us having a laugh over a silly mistake. No big deal.

Same as in dh's solicitor's firm.

As I said before, maybe it is a regional think. Here in Sheffield the word 'numpty' has no real or proper negativity attached to it. Ive never known anyone get offended by the word numpty in any situation!

If ds spills something or trips and hurts himself he gets upset. Saying 'oh you sausage/numpty/pickle' lightens the mood, let's him know we arent cross and makes him chuckle

Teachers aren't bosses and pupils aren't employees. The dynamic is completely different. The relationship you cultivate with the pupils you teach is similar to that of a parent and child. Everything is centred around the child. The pupils are the reason teachers exist. Developing that relationship is really important. This thread has made me laugh, on Thursday I had a meeting with a parent who told me if their son was rude to me I must clip him around the ear. Obviously, completely inappropriate and I never would, but it shows the two extremes.

Whatsername177
You're so right.
Plus, the relationship changes with different ages too and relationships can evolve too so the jokes and banter changes as the year(s) go on.

Some of the affectionate banter between me and my 6th formers has developed over 4/5 years if I taught them when they were younger. The jokes you make with your y11 form when you've taken them through from y7 are different to when you first meet them aged 11.

Part of the job is promoting social and emotional development, and parents who seek offence at every turn doesnt help them. If anything it risks creating fragile sense of self and the feeling of always being a victim/being offended.

If my boss called me a numpty for making a mistake or spilling my drink, he'd be sorry

My boss has called me a numpty! It was fine and I had been a numpty! And yes, it helped reassure me that what had happened hadn’t been a big deal and was fine.

At my school we're seeing increasing numbers of teens who cannot cope with any form of criticism or negative feedback. Some who have meltdowns if they get anything wrong or give up rather than risk failure. Also over analysing everything and looking for offence. Resilience is a life skill that needs to be learned and part of that is understanding that there's a difference between affectionate teasing and deliberate insults.

Numpty is fine with me too.
I call my kids numpties, wee dafties, silly totties.
Us Scots do love a good affectionate insult though, I regularly call DH bawheid and bawbag if he's been a bit daft.

And Yes to all the 'cunting' as an affectionate term in Scotland

Numpty is fine.Almost a term of endearment.
If you moan about this you are setting your children up for a concerning level of over sensitivity.