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AIBU?

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Social Services

56 replies

ssndnfn · 30/11/2019 21:56

I was at the hospital the other day while dc1 had an operation for a hernia, while dc1 was recovering in the cubicle they fell asleep on me and dc2 who's just a toddler was running around and dh was struggling to keep dc2 in the cubicle at one point he was on the phone and dc2 ran off again and he picked dc1 up by one arm and put them back on the bed, I was shocked he did this and several nurses witnessed this.
Do you think they would have made a referral to Children's Services? and do you think they would take the dc's over this I'm so worried and upset with him.

OP posts:
Yesmate · 30/11/2019 22:00

If he was struggling why was he on the phone? I also don’t really understand what your toddler did? You were holding dc1, how did dc2 pick them up?

Mickhasnotorso · 30/11/2019 22:02

Why did you all go??

Jinxed2 · 30/11/2019 22:03

Do you mean your husband picked him up by one arm?

ssndnfn · 30/11/2019 22:03

Sorry dc1 was asleep on me and dh picked dc2 up by one arm and put them on the bed.

OP posts:
DeathStare · 30/11/2019 22:04

Do you think they would have made a referral to Children's Services?

Probably not

and do you think they would take the dc's over this

No

Greysparkles · 30/11/2019 22:05

He picked dc1 roughtly up after he'd had an operation because he couldn't be assed to look after dc2. What a cunt.

Yesmate · 30/11/2019 22:06

Why did your DH pick him up by the arm? Why wasn't he watching your toddler and stopping them from running round a ward? Why was he on the phone and not helping. So many questions.

DeathStare · 30/11/2019 22:06

Hang on..... which child did your DH pick up by one arm? DC1 who had just had the operation and was asleep on you? Or DC2 who was running off?

ssndnfn · 30/11/2019 22:06

It was dc1 who had the operation and dc2 who he picked up.

OP posts:
Icanflyhigh · 30/11/2019 22:07

You're being a bit vague with info OP which I understand, but if DC2 wasn't staying put, why did DH not just put the phone down?
And who picked up DC1? I'm confused.

DeathStare · 30/11/2019 22:09

It was dc1 who had the operation and dc2 who he picked up

Then I stand by my previous answer.

yikesanotherbooboo · 30/11/2019 22:09

SiIf they were going to refer your husband to social services they would almost certainly have had some sort of conversation with you or at least got a paediatrician to talk to you about it.
Social service investigations rarely end up in the place where a child or children are so at risk of harm at home that they are removed just like that.

Jinxed2 · 30/11/2019 22:09

It’s the toddler that he picked up, not the one who had the operation

Mammyloveswine · 30/11/2019 22:10

Why was husband there with dc2? Surely they'd have been better at home?

CodenameVillanelle · 30/11/2019 22:10

Why did he do that?

ssndnfn · 30/11/2019 22:10

I wish he'd just put the phone down he'd been trying to keep dc2 from running off but then after answering the phone he picked dc2 up by one arm. Really stupid thing to do but he did it.

OP posts:
Yesmate · 30/11/2019 22:11

So he was on his phone, annoyed that he was being disturbed and took it out on a toddler. Nice.

IHateWashingUp2 · 30/11/2019 22:14

The staff would have told you if they were notifying social services OP, so no need to worried on that score.

Embracelife · 30/11/2019 22:14

Why did you bring dc2 to run around the ward?
Send DH and dc2 home and let dc2 recover in peace.

If dh is typically aggressive and violent with dc then yeh a referral might be a good idea.

Is he typically aggressive and often throws dc around?

But rather than take dc off you the first approach would be that an aggressive parent leaves.

Embracelife · 30/11/2019 22:16

Have you had dc 2 checked it s easy to dislocate a child s elbow by throwing them around by one arm

Boots20 · 30/11/2019 22:17

Did he hurt the toddler or were they okay? It's hard to say without knowing if he did it in frustration/anger because he was more interested in the phone call and thus upset the child or if he just done it automatically on autopilot while distracted by phonecall and didnt hurt the child in the process

Boots20 · 30/11/2019 22:20

OP said he picked the child up by the arm and sat them on the bed, she didnt say he threw them around ffs

ssndnfn · 30/11/2019 22:22

Dc2 wasn't hurt and didn't cry it was frustration though as the call was only a second which is why he used one arm, he genuinely has never done anything like this before it was the sheer frustration that dc2 was off again. We shouldn't have all gone I stupidly thought it would be nice for dc1 to wake up with us all there.

OP posts:
Embracelife · 30/11/2019 22:23

Then why is op in a panic ?
If it was just a case of picking them up and putting them on the bed.
Then she would not be talking about ss...so either op is simply anxious or there s more to it

Embracelife · 30/11/2019 22:24

OP why are you worrying then if it wasnt violent or aggressive?

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