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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is 400 enough for two dc?

735 replies

Lipperfromchipper · 25/11/2019 17:49

Just a Christmas question, dc are 6 and 4,
I have spent about 320 so far and was thinking if I spent another 80 between them on stocking fillers that would be plenty?? But I’m getting cold feet about that!!? How much have you spent on two dc of similar ages??

OP posts:
whatsinthebagwhatcoulditbe · 26/11/2019 16:31

£400 between two is very generous. I think a good rule of thumb is one "main" present, then something to read, something to eat and something to wear. Plus stockings!

It's quite poignant to see this thread title just above the one of the poster who has £250 total to do Christmas for her three kids.

FrenchJunebug · 26/11/2019 16:54

Seriously!? I am spending £30 on my 8 year old. YABSOOOOOOOOOOOU

ginforthewin4 · 26/11/2019 16:59

@frenchjunebug

That is your decision though. How is it unreasonable for you to spend 30 on a child and me to spend 300 on my child? Both our own decisions Smile

serenajayne1047 · 26/11/2019 17:00

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PortiaCastis · 26/11/2019 17:06

If you haven't got £30 because you're on Universal Credit or suchlike you can't spend it and no that does not mean you don't love your children, it probably means you're breaking your heart and possibly suicidal because of the children, money cannot buy love or respect anyway.

IWorkAtTheCheesecakeFactory · 26/11/2019 17:09

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Celebelly · 26/11/2019 17:10

I think most people in real life fall somewhere in the middle of the two 'extremes': the £30ers and £1000ers.

Elbeagle · 26/11/2019 17:12

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FrenchJunebug · 26/11/2019 17:14

I'm not buying poundland shit but what's on my child's list: one DS games and pokemon cards. It's pretty sad that some parents seem to think that loving a kid means spending hundreds of pounds on stuff for that child on one specific occasion.

Catapillarsruletheworld · 26/11/2019 17:18

I’ve probably spent £200 each on mine (maybe a little more) dd1s main present is a camera which was £200, but her birthday is early January and it’s her main present for both birthday and Christmas.

My dds are 14 and 11 though, the things they want are expensive and they appreciate what they get.

At 4 and 6 I’d say that £50-100 each is more than enough. If they have too much they just end up overwhelmed and don’t know what to play with. Save the money for years in the future when a pair of leggings cost £20!! Enjoy the years they don’t want for much!!

Mymycherrypie · 26/11/2019 17:19

Re the selfless giving and Jesus

*Is it? Who decided that?

It used to be about remembering and celebrating the birth of Jesus*

The birth of Jesus, our saviour who later selflessly gave his life for our sins. That’s exactly what it’s always been about, selflessly giving.

KenAdams · 26/11/2019 17:20

Looool - all the PP's who only spend 10p on their kids - ok then. This is MN where people think nothing of having multiple children, one parent working families, living in expensive areas, private education, cars that cost well in excess of £20k, half a mil mortgages, nannies, £80 pairs of trousers from Hush to lounge about the house in, but apparently you only spend pennies on your kids at Christmas?

I spend a lot more than the OP. I only have one child and a medical condition means I can't have any more. DD doesn't have a sibling to keep her entertained when I'm doing the housework etc so she has things that's she can play with or read or for us all to do together in our free time (board games, consoles etc).

We earn a very decent wage, in a house that's not huge at all but perfectly adequate for the three of us in a cheap area of the county, non fancy cars, cheap clothing etc. and no debt. My money is spent on doing loads of fun stuff with DD at the weekend, her music lessons, decent clothes and shoes for her and other family activities. I can't think of how I'd rather spend my money than on my child and our family. I've cut my cloth accordingly and she is my absolute priority.

That said, I don't really benchmark what I spend against anyone else although I can see that with two you'd want to make sure you were being fair and equal. I'll just buy what I want to, have them waiting under the tree on Christmas morning and not feel the need to take pictures of piles of presents and post them on social media.

Shopkinsdoll · 26/11/2019 17:25

According to a lot of posts I read on this site the average wage on here seems to be roughly 80+ grand a year. So there seems to be a lot of tight ar* spending 30 quid per child. Were I live I don’t know anyone who spends 30-50 quid a child.

Elbeagle · 26/11/2019 17:28

You do understand though that different people reply to different posts?

Sn0tnose · 26/11/2019 17:37

Also I’m confused by people saying that they buy coats and shoes as a Christmas present. They are a necessity. If a child needs a new coat then buy them a coat rather than waiting for an arbitrary date

Ooh, ohh, I know the answer to this one! It’s because there are thousands and thousands of people who can’t afford to buy new shoes, new coats and Christmas presents, so instead of telling their children that they won’t have anything to open on Christmas Day, they combine the two. HTH.

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 26/11/2019 17:45

Pagan Yuletide celebrations were religious and involved animal sacrifice and feasting but as far as I know not gift giving - that came in with the Christians

I feel like the piles of toys are a natural melding of the two traditions. It's like feasting on plastic. Grin

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 26/11/2019 17:49

some parents seem to think that loving a kid means spending hundreds of pounds on stuff for that child on one specific occasion.

And yet not one single person on this thread has said anything of the sort! Hmm.

OP and not a single post I’ve read on this thread states they buy their child to substitute their love.

Buy one present, buy 100 presents as long as you can afford it, the judgement tripe on this thread is staggering tbh.

CymaticPrincess88 · 26/11/2019 17:49

Here's me wishing I even had a quid spare to spend on mine this year

Thanks...

Dishwashersaurous · 26/11/2019 17:52

But that’s my point coat and shoes are not presents so pretend they are simply so that there are more things to unwrap.

IamPickleRick · 26/11/2019 18:17

I’m spending £30k on my kids “lovely! Happy Christmas!”

I’m spending £30 on my kids “lovely! Happy Christmas!”

That’s what Jesus would do.

HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 26/11/2019 18:18

CymaticPrincess88

I’m sorry you going through hardship, however this isn’t the OP fault and no need for the passive aggressive “thanks”

People on here forgot theres real people on the other end of the screen, you have no idea what’s going on in their life.

Lindy2 · 26/11/2019 18:22

Why do you need to ask other people what you should or shouldn't spend?

Your children are 4 and 6 do this is hardly your first Christmas.

Ragwort · 26/11/2019 18:56

Pass your comment actually made me check my DS’s pension fund and it is currently £125K, personally I don’t think that’s too bad at all considering he is only 18 and yet to start full time employment.

Of course I didn’t mean to imply that I never buy him any presents, we just keep them relatively (compared to some of the amounts mentioned on this thread) modest.

But agree, we all make our own choices, I hope that all our children have a truly magical Christmas. Smile

littlebillie · 26/11/2019 19:01

That is excessive

Sn0tnose · 26/11/2019 19:06

But that’s my point coat and shoes are not presents so pretend they are simply so that there are more things to unwrap. I really hope I’ve misunderstood you and you aren’t seriously suggesting that you can’t understand the concept of poverty.

Have you ever been poor? I don’t mean ‘We can’t afford to go on holiday this year’. I mean being on the bones of your arse poor. Because in that world, second hand coats and cheap shoes ARE presents. It’s not a case of having more things to unwrap. Very often it’s a case of them being the only things to unwrap.