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to be annoyed at ^friends^ not feedingmy children?

33 replies

elasticbandstand · 21/08/2007 09:51

my dd's were invited to play one day last week. We got thre at 11.30. Got a call at 5.00 pm to say could they come home now.. fair enough. but when questioned later it turned out they hadnt fed my dc, nor themselves even! apart from a bag of crisps and a chocolate bar.
i know the family do seem to have strange mealtime behaviour but cannot understand the missing out of lunch?

OP posts:

gringottsgoblin · 21/08/2007 09:52

maybe that was lunch?


elasticbandstand · 21/08/2007 09:54

some people have different standards don't they?
or am i being to judgemntal

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MrsWeasley · 21/08/2007 09:54

perhaps they had a late breakfast and then took your DD home just before their Main meal!

I know a few families that do this esp in the holidays.


notnowbernard · 21/08/2007 09:55

That is a long time to go without eating, agree.


Rhubarb · 21/08/2007 09:56

Never trust children. My dd once went to play with her friend across the road and she told them that she hadn't had any tea, so they gave her some tea because they felt sorry for her! She had 2 good meals in 2 hours!

But also agree that crisps and chocolate could well be lunch. Could be that mum was tired and hassled and decided that as their friends were over, they could eat crap for lunch.

I wouldn't think anything of it one way or the other.


elasticbandstand · 21/08/2007 09:57

of course rhubarb,
mum is tired but is herself trying to put on weight so i cannot understand the attitude.. arch well

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HonoriaGlossop · 21/08/2007 09:57

Well, it's not something I would do - of course you'd give lunch to visitors.

Was it a prior arrangement that it was an all day play? Maybe the parents thought your dd's were only there for a couple of hours. Maybe they weren't expecting you before lunch.

If they WERE, then yes, it's just odd.


WanderingTrolley · 21/08/2007 09:59

I was going to say something similar to Rhubarb.

Children's memories are shit (apart from the one time you did something wrong)

They may have had lunch and wiped their memories.

Ring the mum and say one of your dds has a slight rash - just wondered what they had for lunch as the girls have both forgotten...?


HonoriaGlossop · 21/08/2007 09:59

That IS a good point Rhubarb - elastic, your dd may have discounted that organic wholemeal seeded granary organic 'good' ham sandwich as NOT what lunch is


elasticbandstand · 21/08/2007 10:00

oh yes they TOLD us when to come.
unfortunaely my youngest only had a bite for breakfast, they did ask Have they had breakfast, and this was at 12.30? WEll Yes of course i said, if only i had known they werent going t have proper lunch i would have said,
but, i know they have peculiar meal times, only eat when mum feels like it for example.

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Rhubarb · 21/08/2007 10:01

No really, don't. The mum could have had a really shit day so don't make her feel awful for not giving them lunch. Your dd's won't suffer for missing out one meal. I'm a skinny cow and the reason for that is not eating properly. When I'm depressed I just don't make anything for myself at all, and if dd had friends round I'd be inclined to chuck crisps at them too.


fawkeoff · 21/08/2007 10:01

did they just stay at your friends house or did they go out??.only asking as she should have given them something more than crisps and chocolate if they where at her house all afternoon.


Rhubarb · 21/08/2007 10:01

And you are very trusting of what your kids tell you elastic.


elasticbandstand · 21/08/2007 10:02

i just asked dc again,
nothign they said
only a chocolate bar and an apple they admitted.
perhaps their dc's are such faddy eaters they feed them tha?

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elasticbandstand · 21/08/2007 10:03

and No i wouldnt say anything to mum, and of course i am being too judgemental, just ranting!

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Rhubarb · 21/08/2007 10:04

aha - an apple as well now? Bet they've had more!

Trust me, our old neighbours did ask dd again and again, "are you sure you haven't been fed?" and she was very insistent that she hadn't! So they fed her and then questioned us about it next time they saw us. dd said she had 'forgotten' about the lovely meal I'd made her


elasticbandstand · 21/08/2007 10:12

i bet your old neighbours were at your not giving your dd tea.
just oes to show
Dont believe what they always say

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Rhubarb · 21/08/2007 10:15

They were a bit shocked, they're French so not feeding your kids their main meal is a major sin in their books!

dd ate it all up too, which left them convinced that she hadn't been fed by her evil English parents.

I could have throttled her when I found out!


clapton · 21/08/2007 10:17

I go into a blind panic when I have dc's friends come round for lunch or tea. I never know what to give them.

I'm soft though, I want to make sure they are having a good time etc. and give them something they like rather than them feeling awkward if they dont like something.


OrmIrian · 21/08/2007 10:21

My DS#2 only ever ate yellow peas at nursery (sweetcorn).
Which was odd as I saw the menu in the mornings and sweetcorn wasn't that common.
He just happened to really like it and I don't cook it at home because my other 2 don't like it much.
Could it be that having a chocolate biscuit was the best bit of lunch?
I must admit that I'm a bit vague about lunchtimes - evening meal is a given but breakfast and lunch are definitely moveable feasts. Having said that if we had guests I'd make more of an effort.


JeremyVile · 21/08/2007 10:23

Maybe a misunderstanding?
They called to tell you to pick them up, were they expecting you to just turn up of your own accord alot earlier so didn't know whether to give them a meal?

Failing that - DCs are 'forgetting' the other stuff they ate!


cornsilk · 21/08/2007 10:25

One of my ds's friends won't eat anythig - always refuses food, so I wait till he's gone to give my ds's food now, there's no point, it doesn't get eaten. I always ask but he always refuses. I give them snacks instead.


fiddlemama · 21/08/2007 10:38

I think it's very odd. Whilst I agree you can't always trust what very young children say (I don't know the ages of your dds)I would always provide a meal at lunchtime (though in the holidays lunch can be any time between 12 and 2pm depending on what I'm doing!).

Sometimes, when they were younger, some of my dc's friends would not necessarily eat what was provided, in which case I would question them as to what they might like (if I could provide it).

There were occasions when a child refused to eat anything much other than "junk" and, rather than spoil their day, I would usually give in and provide junk all round to avoid arguments and whining from my dc's! Rhubarb is right, kids won't suffer greatly for missing one meal. However, I would always then tell the parent picking up "sorry, I tried but couldn't get him/her to eat more than a packet of crisps and some chocolate etc"

Most odd behaviour, but I wouldn't lose leep over it.


LIZS · 21/08/2007 10:47

Perhaps they were offered soemthing and declined .


elasticbandstand · 21/08/2007 11:48

i think they were all too busy playing.
the dad did suggest they might not feed them as they were going on holiday soon, or may be just toast. but i thought he was joking!

oh well, no sleep lost.

may be i have a thing about food, i was shocked too when i picked up dd from a sleepever at 11 and she HADNT had breakfast!!
must be just me

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