DC going vegan?

[57mama]

My DC are 12 & 14. They've decided that they want to go vegan because it's "healthier". They've been vegetarian for almost 5 years because they just refuse to eat any meat or fish we serve to them (except the gravy and roast potatoes that they think are vegan ). DH and I will absolutely not be going vegan, whether we let the DC do it or not. I've heard all the stories about vegan kids being malnourished etc, but AIBU to let them? DH thinks it's dangerous and inconvenient, but they'll be cooking for themselves, and surely they can just stop if they want/need to? Any advice would be appreciated!

If they are cooking for themselves then there is really no issues with it. Vegan food is just as cheap or even cheaper than meat and dairy if you buy things such as beans, lentils, rice, pasta and tofu.

@Pinkblueberry I’m confused, many people believe vegan diets are healthier than having milk and cheese because of scientific evidence.

Of course there is scientific debate about this but it’s just the same as people who avoid red meat for health reasons.

they want to go vegan because it's "healthier" I agree with them.

(except the gravy and roast potatoes that they think are vegan wink). Dick move on your part. Tricking your kids is not something to be proud of.

I've heard all the stories about vegan kids being malnourished etc, but AIBU to let them?
If they eat a proper balanced diet there is n reason at all why they would be malnourished.

DH thinks it's dangerous and inconvenient Your DH is wrong. The DC you say will be cooking for themselves so how is it going to be inconvenient for him?

Gamechangers on Netflix is very informative.

Stop lying to them for a start

Tell them to do a meal plan, budget it and show they're prepared to split the cooking between them for a month to show they're serious. Worked for my DM when I went veggie.

If they are vitamin-dodgers, I'd be reluctant to support their dietary choices. (Maybe ask them to draw up a list of at least 5 vegan main meals that cover all major food groups

I couldn’t do that and we are vegetarian/vegan

At 12 and 14 I would be making them do their own research. Specifically, I would make them research potential deficiencies of a vegan diet for teenagers and ways to overcome this. If they can bring that to you with a clear plan for what their diet should include, including any supplements they'll need, then fine. Otherwise, you are the parents and it is your responsibility to ensure they do actually have a healthy diet, which usually needs to include some animal products.

Why would you feed a vegetarian none vegetarian food? That’s so disrespectful. If you can’t be arsed cooking vegetarian gravy just tell them they will have to go without or do it themselves. Although I personally would just make the gravy vegetarian, it’s not a big ask and is less bad for you.

vegan diets are healthier than having milk and cheese because of scientific evidence.

Nope.

www.theguardian.com/science/2014/mar/04/animal-protein-diets-smoking-meat-eggs-dairy

People under 65 who eat a lot of meat, eggs and dairy are four times as likely to die from cancer or diabetes, study suggests.

Not the best of surveys... done over 5 years ago and is based on just a few thousand people - and also includes red meat consumption. So I don’t see how this proves a point?? You’ll find at the end of the day that most older, healthy people have not abstained from milk or eggs most of their lives. Limited studies based on weak correlative evidence does not trump common sense...

@Pinkblueberry I am honestly astonished that you completely took what I said out of context.

Can you read? I wrote: ‘many people believe vegan diets are healthier than having milk and cheese because of scientific debate.’

The ‘many people believe’ is very important.

I’m waiting for your unbiased, excellently researched and peer reviewed studies which say that diets with dairy and eggs are better than vegan diets.

But I’m sure I’ll be waiting for a long time.

Going vegetarian in my house is not an option until the DC are fully grown, it's not healthy for a growing child and you cannot get all the essential amino acids you need from a vegetarian diet. If they want to go veggie when they're older they can.

I would never support child of mine having a vegan diet, it is not healthy or balanced and they would need to wait until the leave home to eat in that way. However, I also think that they've had "you need a healthy, balanced diet" instilled in them from quite a young age and I doubt they would choose to eat that badly.

Going vegetarian in my house is not an option until the DC are fully grown, it's not healthy for a growing child and you cannot get all the essential amino acids you need from a vegetarian diet. If they want to go veggie when they're older they can.

I’m fascinated by all these people who think they can decide whether they will ‘let’ their children turn vegetarian. What will you do if they simply refuse to eat meat? Are you going to force it down their throats?

I would let them. You don’t have to buy ‘overpriced’ vegan things as others have mentioned. Beans, lentils, fruits, veggies, potatoes, rice, pasta, porridge oats, dairy free milk, bread, peanut butter, coconut milk are all good basic cheap staples.

If you don’t want to cook for them then fair enough. That seems unfair though, why don’t you cook for them a few times a week and spend some time teaching them, I’m assuming they aren’t 100% fantastic chefs at this age.

Regarding protein, you need around 0.36g per pound of body weight, so if one of your kids weighed 9 stone hey would need about 45g of protein per day. Half a cup of cooked kidney beans and half a cup of boiled black beans together would give just over 15g. That’s not including anything else they ate in that meal. Let them do some days eating plans to present to you to make sure they are getting enough.

For B12, I would sugggest a supplement for sure. Someone who consumes animal products only get it because the animals are supplemented with it themselves. It’s not something that occurs in them either.

Plant based lifestyles are mainstream now. I recommend they up their carbs and their quantities. Make sure nuts and beans/lentils are a daily part of their intake and that they eat a wide variety of colourful fruit and veg. Make sure they take a vitamin B12 tablet daily.

Stop behaving like total arseholes and cook the roasties in veg oil and get some veggie gravy granules for a start.

Honestly what a totally dickhead move.

You sound horrible.

If they wish to be vegan they are old enough to cook. They do need to look at things themselves but I wouldn't dream of serving meat gravy to my daughter

I’ll encourage them to educate themselves before making such a huge decision . Then I’d buy them a vegan cookbook and tell them to crack on .
I wouldn’t be changing my eating or cooking habits to accommodate a current trend .

People under 65 who eat a lot of meat, eggs and dairy are four times as likely to die from cancer or diabetes, study suggests.

Surely the key phrase in that sentence is "a lot of".

@pourmeanotherglass I never knew red bristo was vegan! You have made my day!

Can you read? I wrote: ‘many people believe vegan diets are healthier than having milk and cheese because of scientific debate.’

I can indeed. You wrote this:

many people believe vegan diets are healthier than having milk and cheese because of scientific evidence.

You said ‘evidence’, not ‘debate’. Maybe you should read what you wrote yourself, and the articles you posted. I’m calling out nonsense sensationalist news that some like to call ‘evidence’. I’m not taking anything out of context - but you are by quoting an article that describes the effect of meat as well as dairy and eggs - and is therefore not really relevant. This is the sort of thing I was talking about and the sort of thing I don’t want my children falling for. Thanks for illustrating it so beautifully.

I think feeding vegetarian children meat products and lying to them about it is a terrible thing to do.

As far as I’m aware there’s research which points to moderate intake of dairy as being beneficial in terms of prevention of serious disease..... and then there’s research which points to the opposite - ie, any consumption of dairy being harmful. It’s a minefield, and you either have to wade through thousands of pages of research yourself while getting a master degree in statistics or you just go with your gut instinct and what feels better for your own body/fits your life better.