To ask if anyone has ever gotten over fear of flying

[picklejimmy]

I have an absolute crippling fear of flying. I am due to fly march next year and I am already having sleepiness nights because of it. I can't get over the thought of it crashing. The logical part of me knows the odd are tiny but I spent all of last night picturing the most awful outcomes, it panicked me so much I cried (Im aware I am coming across as ridiculous but just trying to be honest).
It's 4 months away but I don't want to spend all that time worrying.
How can I get over this fear? Has anyone on here successfuly done it?

My Hubby thinks I’m mad.

Brighteyeowl17
You're not mad at all!

Go on YouTube and watch hours and hours of take offs, take off in storms, landings, landings in storms, go around, aborted take offs etc.

Mentour Pilot channel is brilliant. He explains all of the noises and bumps you feel and why it's happening.

Like others have said the only way to fix the fear was to expose myself to it and see that I didn't die. I've since been on hundreds of flights and fly alone a lot. I flew to the USA twice alone too. Having the "insider" knowledge of aviation really helped me.

Also forgot to mention Flight Radar. Go and see how many thousands of flights are in the air right now. It's incredible.

I love mentour pilot!

I would worry that if I went on YouTube and looked at that stuff I would inevitably end up finding place crash stuff.
The thing that really effected me and made it a million times worse was that place crash where the pilot purposely crashed into the alps. I couldn't even imagine getting on a plane after reading about that, but as I said this flight is unavoidable.

Sorry for the typos I meant to write plane. I need to check before I post sorry!

I hate flying - I got better when I had to fly more - too routine and tiring to get seriously worn down by. Now I fly less, I’m more anxious.

Have you got a nice life insurance policy? I know it’s a bit bonkers but I find it reassuring to know that if anything awful happens, it’ll benefit someone I love.

I have the little easyJet MP3 player which does help calm me a bit. There is one bit I play over. The pilot says ‘I go to work then go home to my family no one would do this is they thought it was dangerous’. In my head I always envisage some sort of panic that pilots have all the time. Mostly they are just drinking tea I think.

pickljimmy.
I used to be the same as you, loved take off and loved landing, hated the bit in the middle. I know for me it's a control issue, I'm not in charge of the plane, again. So for me that means that someone else is in charge of me. I was absolutely fine when I was younger,
I once spent a flight seated next to an ex cabin crew member, the poor man!! He talked me through the whole flight. What the different noises are, why the plane turns quickly. As soon as the cabin crew are directed to start work the take off is successful
I've improved over the years just as pp said I want to go to different places so I have to get on that plane.
I'd try SultanaLoaf's suggestion, having that voice in your ear really might make a difference.
My breakthrough was a solo flight to Australia. It's just not possible to keep the fear around for that long
I really wish you well with this, it's much nicer if you're not scared, it might not happen overnight but you've had a few good suggestions here,

That's actually a good point Brighteyeowl17

I'm
Not over my fear, but I take medication which takes the edge off enough for me to get through it.
Friend was hypnotised and it worked amazingly well for her.

I had hypnotherapy and it changed my life. I can fly now without taking valium. I don't like it, but I don't panic the way I used to.

@Butterisbest I definitely have and will be taking them all on board (excuse the pun)

I was similar to you and didn't fly for a good 5 years. I did the easyjet course as a first step but it was not an instant cure. I cried and was terrified, as per usual for me! With the help of my partner we started to book short flights and I was still absolutely terrified, but I got diazepam and that helped. I then got a job the required frequent short flights and I think the frequency really helps to break down the fear. My top tips would be 1. Accept that it is going to be scary, there isn't an instant cure. Get some diazepam to take the edge off. 2. If you're not doing any cardio, start! 20-30mins a day will burn off all the adrenaline from your scary thoughts, all the way up to the day before the flight. 3. This is the hardest.. Ignore all the scary thoughts, they feel incredibly real but they are nothing to do with what is actually happening in reality. This was the hardest part for me to really understand - you won't be able to see this now as you're deep in the anxiety but you must have faith that this is true and keep putting one step in front of the other in order to get your flight. I know it feels like it goes against all your instincts not to believe in those thoughts but choosing not to believe in them is a big step in the right direction!

How did people get their doc to prescribe meds? Mine laughed and told Me to ‘just relax’

I did the Virgin fear of flying course and it completely cured me to the point where I actively enjoy flying :)

I watch Captain Joe on YouTube. He's really helped me overcome my nerves. That's not what his videos are about but its a wonderful side effect

I don't like it either OP. I'm due to go to Sweden next month and have decided not to think about it until I'm on the plane

It's take off for me. And turbulence. I literally stare at the staff to see if they look panicked or not.

I just hold my husbands hand tightly but just typing this is making me feel nervous!

I didn’t fly for a really long time and in the end I realised it was limiting my life too much so I booked a couple of holidays and got on with it - the flights weren’t easy, I threw up every time I flew for a couple of years, although I’m mostly over that now (other than when I was pregnant) but the more I did it, the easier it got. Like you it’s the bit right after take off that I hate, when the engine sounds change and there’s almost a falling sensation as the plane turns - so I sit by the window, I can see that we aren’t falling. I have amazing noise cancelling headphones which have helped massively, I put something on my iPad to distract me and I plan in advance what I’m going to watch, so each episode is a bit closer to landing. I also have colouring and game apps which I can use but keep tv programmes playing in the background, basically I need to keep myself busy! I also watch the cabin crew a lot, if they’re serving drinks and selling duty free then everything’s fine! I was lucky enough to be able to do a day of cabin crew training through work, and I now know how to evacuate an aircraft, put out a toilet fire and get out of a smoke filled cabin, which has also definitely helped, but obviously this isn’t available to the general public! 😂 in the last couple of years I’ve even managed to fly alone and taken my baby abroad alone which is a massive achievement for me. I’m still the worst person ever to sit next to, I sit bolt upright and don’t relax and fidget so much. I’d love to be able to sleep on a flight.

Brighteyeowl, I just told my doctor that I wanted drugs and why. This was a very long time ago though.

I just tried to watch a pilot on YouTube explaining why not to be scared. My heart started pounding and I cried. I'm so worried I'm not going to get over this.
It seems to pathetic to be this affected when I'm not flying for months. I think I've built it up too much in my head over the yrs.

I used to absolutely hate it and it scared me to death.... I used to go to the GP and he'd give me diazepam which helped loads. The more I fly the better it gets. I now have to fly every month or so with work and it hardly bothers me now. I'm anxious at best.

@JaneyGotAGun I’ve PM’d you the details.

The noise cancelling headphones is a good idea, I might be able to convince myself I'm on a bus.
I am so thankful for all of your suggestions which I will be trying out!