AIBU?
Who should pay?
PookieDo · 19/11/2019 18:00
Group of teenagers (under 18) decide to go to a gig. Gig is age appropriate
Teens A B C and D have part time jobs and transfer money to A for their tickets, then A pays. their own money, not from parents.
Teen E wants to join in, but doesn’t have the money upfront. A pays for it and E says they have a new job and will pay A back when gets paid. E has not paid A back yet
Teens then collectively decide to go to another upcoming event and teen C’s mum agrees to collect the money from them all and book it. Teen E’s parent decides they would like to pay for E for a Christmas present then becomes aware that E has not paid for the other ticket yet, and discloses that E does not have a job yet so can’t pay for event 1.
C’s mum is in a dilemma over whether to accept the money for E for event 2 knowing event 1 has not been paid for by E back to A.
A’s mum feels awkward knowing E has not paid their child back and that C is in a dilemma.
E’s mum is not offering to pay for both events.
What should A, C and E parents do? Or should the teens just sort this out between them?
HugoSpritz · 19/11/2019 18:09
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CalmFizz · 19/11/2019 18:12
How much are the events? Does E have the funds to actually attend either event beyond the ticket price?
Are they a very close group of friends or more scattered?
Is E and their family less financially able than the rest of the group or is it a a lifestyle choice not to facilitate their child’s friendship?
Sorry for all the questions, but it would altar how I’d approach things.
feelingsinister · 19/11/2019 18:14
If C's mum didn't know about the owed money then I don't think it's fair to expect her to be out of pocket. If she knew and decided to take the risk anyway then that's a bit silly.
Is either event sold out with a chance to sell on a ticket or find another friend?
I think what I'd do along with C's mum is give E and her family the choice.
Go to both and pay up.
Go to one and either they or one of the others finds another person/sells the ticket to recoup the cost.
E is taking the piss and E's family need to settle the debts and ensure it doesn't happen again.
PookieDo · 19/11/2019 18:17
C’s DM has not paid for anything yet, she is just collecting money first. C’s DM is aware that event 1 had not been paid for and raised it to A’s DM out of concern.
A’s DM warned A not to do it in the first place. A is upset that E lied about having a job when they don’t, but says they will wait for the money so E doesn’t miss out.
Ticket 1 is £80 and ticket 2 is £45
LiveFatsDieYoGnu · 19/11/2019 18:26
Right, so I still think E's Mum should pay A what she can, ideally the full £80, and extract the £35 difference from E (birthday/Christmas/pocket money as appropriate).
E simply can't afford to go to the second event, and C shouldn't take money or buy E a ticket for it.
IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 19/11/2019 18:28
I would be mortified someone else was out of pocket for my child so would pay back the person owed and they would learn a lesson in that it meant less Christmas presents and certainly no second event.
I wouldn’t purchase any further tickets for E or mum unless the debt wasn’t paid irrespective of it being owed to someone else.
Drum2018 · 19/11/2019 18:36
Can the group find another friend who would buy the ticket meant for E to the first gig - and just tell E he's no longer welcome to go? C's DM is clever collecting the money upfront for gig 2. Nobody should expect someone else to buy a ticket without payment. E is a CF and doesn't deserve to get a ticket for gig 2 until gig 1 is paid for.
Alarae · 19/11/2019 18:58
I would leave the second event but get E's ticket for event 1 resold to someone else who will pay.
E shouldn't expect to participate if they don't stump up.
Unfortunately you can't get the money paid by E's mum from C unless the mum says so. Morally you should, but realistically it's not your call to make.
If anything, C's mum could refuse to book for E (even with money upfront) due to the outstanding debt but it doesn't stop E's mum from buying the ticket herself. Might be an eye-opener for her though about how her child is taking advantage of their friend and make her think twice about funding the second event in the first place.
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