To think i might stand a chance with him

[Practicalmagico]

Hi, excuse me for sounding like a teenager with a crush!

Basically about 5 years ago, I worked with a man who I had feelings for and they were mutual feelings however nothing ever progressed. He left the company and I heard nothing after that.

Anyway, about a year ago, I added him on Facebook- again, I heard nothing from him.
A couple of days ago, I posted a nice selfie on Facebook which he liked and I then almost immediately got a follow request on Instagram from him.

Last night, I went for a few drinks with some friends and lo and behold, he was there too in the same bar! I could see him glancing over at me out of the corner of my eye, doing double takes.

WIBU to think he likes me again and to message him saying hi?

Right...the update is? He looked at you? Hmm ok OP. Maybe just ask him out like an adult?

I really think that he might like you OP but he's also scared of rejection and that's why he's finding it difficult to approach you. You should maybe just message him back and ask him for a friendly drink. If he says yes then you can tak it from there. If it a no, then at least you tried...

Why not just ask him out for a drink one day after work? You're both local to each other so an easy option.

From your update, he sounds totally into you!!

Right, I will ask him out

Oooh good luck op!

Wooooo! Good luck op.

Please update us, I love these threads!

He's definitely into you from the update.

He is 100% into you! No doubt in my mind. Good luck and update us!

You can’t just leave us hanging!

Oh no, I’ve just been told he’s had a girlfriend for the last couple of months! Never mind

How did you find this out?

Last Thursday, he wanted to say bye properly - you had already left the bar at this point. Now you have found out he has a girlfriend, clearly she wasn't in his thoughts on Thursday evening !!!

I found out through a mutual friend who I confided in this evening after I decided that I was going to ask him out.
That’s such a shame. Obviously I’m not going to go there now but I am disappointed

Feel like a bit of an idiot now like I just imagined everything!

*Through the night, I know I wasn’t imagining it, he and his friends were talking together while staring at me. They were all drunk so weren’t being discreet at all. I caught them doing this about 10 times in the space of about an hour!

When I got home, I got a message from him asking if I was still at the bar. I said no because it was getting a bit late so I’d gotten a lift home. I asked why he was asking and he said he wanted to know because he wanted to ‘say bye properly’.*

Bit sketchy behaviour for someone with a gf. Esp the message. Bullet dodged by sound of it.

Well you didn't imagine a late night msg from.hjm asking if you'd left etc.

@Sandals19 thanks. You’re right about dodging a bullet

I reckon with quite a few drinks in, he got braver/less inhibited/flirtier/scruples went - he was maybe being encouraged by mates whom he told about you/saw you etc. - not great at all unless he's become single since your acquaintance heard of his relationship status.

i think you dodged the bullet well and truly OP He was drunk with his friends on Thursday night? tries to text you? and he has a girlfriend?

Not a keeper. Or anyone you should be near.

Yeah I think so too. It sucks because I actually thought he liked me but I’m sure he would’ve done that with any woman given the right amount of alcohol.

Do you think he didn't ask you out when you worked together because he was being professional? Like, why did nothing progress before?

@managedmis the thing is, I don’t think he ever knew I liked him so I think he was reluctant to make a move. If I’d rejected him, seeing each other every day would have been uncomfortable!

@crosstalk

That’s a bit unfair to him. He’s text wasn’t appropriate at all. Just OP’s reading of it if true would be.

@plantainchips what do you think he meant?