To not understand how it's cheaper to send dc to school with a cold happy meal than a packed lunch?

[bobstersmum]

In the news this week, an article about children in deprived areas being sent to school with a cold happy meal. Then parents in another article defending the reasons for it, saying that sometimes it's all they can afford. I just can't understand it? A happy meal is 2.99 I think? But a cheap loaf of bread is 50p, a cheap pack of sandwich meat or cheese is less than a pound, bag of bananas a pound multipack of crisps a pound, that's lunches for the week for around the same cost?

I just read that article in the Guardian. Apparently walking half an hour to a supermarket is too far. I never knew that.

It’s not just about the money and availability of supermarkets. You need to consider carrying it all back by foot or on the bus. It’s heavy. And you probably can’t carry a week’s worth of shopping for a family in one go.
And yet this is what my mum did. There were no shops nearby or they were expensive. We had to get the bus to the town. I seem to recall she had one of those wheely shopping trolleys to carry it all in (and still uses one now, at the age of 80).

A 30 minute walk is nothing, especially if it means feeding your children.

There is no excuse for not feeding a child imo. It’s not an unknown that children cost money and having children is a choice always in the UK.

daisypond I've never shopped online either. I've always walked to the shops. When my kids were little I put the shopping on the buggy, when they were older I put the shopping in a bag on wheels.
I don't think walking a few miles to ensure your children are fed properly (assuming you're able bodied) is too much effort really.
Of course it's different if you live rurally, but don't most British people live in towns?

Maybe the parents never learned how to make a sandwich? I have met people like that. I know it sounds ridiculous.

I was asked by a work colleague in his 50s how I knew how to make meals as he's never done that himself. He went on to say he didn't even know how to put salt on things as his wife always did that for him. (personally I feel sorry for his family as he's so overbearingly dependent....)

maud yes I do. Not trying to be unsympathetic.
I think it's lack of basic key skills which in the old days were more of a focus in school. Now it seems that it's more about getting grades in academic subjects & key skills are not considered as vital.
Some children would really benefit from skills such as gardening, cookery, sewing - maybe they could grow veg & cook from scratch which is a life skill. I was lucky enough to learn from parents & grandparents. Also school in the 80s taught some of this.

A 30 minute walk is nothing, especially if it means feeding your children.

It depends on the route, doesn't it? Thirty minutes along a well lit pavement through suburbia is very different to thirty minutes along unlit country lanes with no pavement to speak of.

converseandjeans same here, I feel very fortunate to have learnt those skills.

A half hour walk (and the half hour back with heavy shopping) would be beyond the capacity of many people living in chronic poverty. I think you underestimate the effects of depression, anxiety, conditions associated with isolation and mental health issues like CFS/fibromyalgia, and the difficulty of dragging reluctant offspring out. Good physical health and energy are not universal, sadly.

@Squidsister But was your mum doing that on top of a full time job? I used to take my DC to the shops on the bus after work, and it wasn’t easy at all. I remember an awful time when the wheel came off the buggy and I had to somehow carry the buggy with a toddler and baby in a sling and the shopping, and then a gang fight broke out on the bus, and the bus refused to move, etc, and it was winter and raining. I was in tears with exhaustion by the end of it, and I was not in poverty - I could make other choices. Some don’t have that option.

People living "normal, ordinary" middle class lives can't often see how life can be so different.

There was a lady in our local paper - she had no money, she was in a B&B - she had a room, for her and her little boy -8 years old. There was no cooker and she had no room for a fridge (bed, wardrobe, sink, shared access to a toilet and shower). How the heck was she supposed to buy and store all this lovely packed lunch food - her whole world was 8ft by 10ft.

She can now - as a result of the newspaper article "more suitable housing was found".

A half hour walk (and the half hour back with heavy shopping) would be beyond the capacity of many people living in chronic poverty. I think you underestimate the effects of depression, anxiety, conditions associated with isolation and mental health issues like CFS/fibromyalgia, and the difficulty of dragging reluctant offspring out. Good physical health and energy are not universal, sadly.

This.

That's the thing about privilege. It's often invisible to those who have it.

A half an hour walk into town is a much easier thing for someone who has other people to look after the kids, decent all-weather outdoor clothing, lives in a well lit, nice area with proper pavements all the way to the shops and no need to walk through dodgy areas and has good physical and mental health. You can say - "what's wrong with a half hour walk, I can do it, why can't others?"

But, a mother living in poverty is less likely to have someone to look after the DC while they shop, may well not have proper waterproof clothing for her and all the DC suitable for a long walk in the rain or snow, the journey to the supermarket might go through dodgy areas, or not be on roads made for pedestrians, and they are much more likely than those with money to have physical or mental health conditions.

Your experiences of life, if you're comfortable, are very different to people in poverty. You don't realise how much your privilege smooths the way for you, without you even having to think about it. And that's the real privilege of having money. When you're well off you have choices available to you. You have much more agency. You can chose to do things on your own terms, in a way that suits you.

If you don't have money for long periods of time, then your choices can be very limited and there are constant barriers to overcome and problems to solve that could be made to go away if only you had some money to chuck at it.

We're not talking about half an hour to the supermarket as a one off. You're talking about doing this a few times a week and carrying all the stuff back, on top of whatever other demands the mother has. If she also works when the kids are at school, then your talking about dragging the DC to the supermarket with her, taking up a huge amount of family time, come rain or shine, all year round.

That's not realistic. DC can't spend their childhood being dragged to the supermarket and back constantly. When are they meant to do their homework? Or play?

Plenty of nutrition and variety in it where as a happy meal is apparently £2.69 and would cost £13.45 per week to feed a child 1 everyday

Who said about feeding a child mcds every day? No one, not even the teacher she said sometimes and doesn't say if it's even the same child. Even the exaggerated newspaper version of "often" doesn't mean every day.

Lots of people don’t have childcare to shop, it still needs to be done though and they manage.

If you decide to have children then you need to make the effort. They didn’t ask to be born and parenting comes with a whole host of responsibilities.

The original article doesn’t specify people sending cold McDonald’s Happy Meals because they can’t afford anything else. It says children are sent with half a sandwich because they can’t afford anything else. You’re conflating the 2 lunches

If you read the article the teacher refused to reheat the cold McDonalds and sent the child for a hot school lunch. She's a reception teacher. All children in reception are entitled to a free hot school meal at lunchtime. So I'm confused why parents would send in a cold McDonalds if their child gets a free school lunch anyway. Am I missing something?

Lol!. I grew up in extreme abject poverty thanks some days i didn't even have a hot meal or clothes to wear at all so yes i have a grasp of what poverty is thanks and it's not been able to afford McDonalds. I myself at the moment live on an extreme budget due to circumstances out of my control forcing me onto UC hence my comment of living on £15 a week for food. £1 delivery for a food shop to your house is still cheaper than a happy meal and even when i visit the local food banks and charities i don't see anyone who doesn't have a smartphone or access to a computer to do a quick online shop and if you can find someone on a lower income than me of £10k a year then I'd be suprised especially when you get extra benefits for having children such as child benefit etc

It’s lazy parenting

Why is this so often excused

So these kids are at home when the parent or parents go to McDonald’s

Why are we excusing people making poor choices that harm children

We were really poor as many of us probably were on here yet lazy parenting and excusing this seems to be more of a new phenomenon. There was crap cheap food around in the 70’s/80’s (not as much)

It’s not poverty, not even the article says it’s -about poverty. This is 11 pages over nothing

But I can well believe children do get sent with McDonald’s.
It is lazy parenting. Yet I follow a woman in NYC who posts photos of the amazing packed lunches she sends her children with and quite often or includes left over take away, or leftover nuts from a recent flight etc. Not sure it’s really that different, although it will be healthier food. I think it’s just our perception of a) take away food as unhealthy, lazy and shameful and b) the fact that the child was send with a meal that’s supposed to be hot, cold.

I don’t like it but I’m not sure it’s newspaper article scandalous. All schools have rules about what food they allow to be brought in- some parents have broken this one. It’s not really a big deal IMO.

Is it also lazy that I take two slices of cold leftover pizza for my lunch at work? Or is it simply using up leftovers which otherwise would have gone into the bin?

So the child in the article had a full happy meal from the night before because he didn't eat it. Not the healthiest but it was one day.

Everyone raving about poor people buying McDonald's and it's not even the case

20% of adults in the U.K. don’t have smartphones.

Deprived is not just about money. It’s about knowledge and basic skills etc. It’s not the money part directly causing the happy meal situation.

Oh please

Skills to make a sandwich

Not knowing the McDonalds isn’t healthy

The number of people that only have takeaways or the most expensive kind of convenience store within say a mile of their home

Nearest supermarket was nearly 5 mikes from my home growing up. Of course my DF had a car and worked so did a big weekly shop. I imagine other, poorer, people in the area struggled and probably still do as there isn't a supermarket any nearer now.