To have a completely second hand Christmas

[Wiltinglillies]

Each year I've felt more and more uncomfortable with buying a load of stuff, lots of it plastic, new when identical items are available for often a fraction of the price on eBay or Facebook.
All in our household are totally on board and MIL always gets us stuff from charity shops, so she'll be ok. I just want to explain to my small wider family how important it is. Also intend to spend the same amount of money as usual on other kids in the extended family, so they'll be able to get bigger gifts.
What do you think? Would you be offended if an auntie or cousin got you something (obviously clean and working) second hand?

[Ragwort]

Tip - check out your charity shops after Christmas, I manage a charity shop & we will be inundated with unwanted Christmas presents; we don’t put out ‘tat’, we are very careful about what we sell, today we were donated lovely, unused items, easily costing £sss in most retailers, we have loads of happy customers.

[Bluewavescrashing]

It's just not sustainable for everyone in the developed world to buy mountains of presents every year. We need to he smarter than that.

[BeanBag7]

Hmm I buy second hand for my own kids but not sure I would for my nieces and nephews as I'm not sure how the parents would feel about it. As seen on this thread, opinion is somewhat divided

[BeanBag7]

I definitely wouldnt have an issue with something still in the original packing and unopened, they wouldnt even know it came from a charity shop / second hand

[converseandjeans]

I would say some might be ok with it, However could you not just stay away from plastic & invest in nice food, books, things people need like PJs etc??

[Sizeofalentil]

I love secondhand but wouldn't be happy with most secondhand gifts because 'good condition' is in the eye of the beholder.

My best friend has given me loads of gorgeous vintage paintings that I love. But on the other hand, I've had relatives gift me shabby baby items or dirty vases.

I don't mind buying something a bit grubby for myself- as I'm the one committing to washing and refurbishing it. But hate it when someone else gifts me secondhand stuff that I'll have to spend time cleaning when I wouldn't have necessarily bought it for myself in the first place.

[Wiltinglillies]

Actually, I'm picking up a set of books from a Facebook seller next week. Apart from the Smiggle toy which is (surprisingly sturdy) plastic tat, it's all stuff I'd have bought over the next year anyway.
I did fancy jams one year, but had a friend with a germ phobia who was rather ungracious, so that sort of put me off.

[TreestumpsAndTrampolines]

I think it sounds great - I mean you're still going with a standard present exchange too, but the idea of everyone having to buy only second hand stuff sounds great fun (well, as long as it's only for a few people - not my family with 20 uncles and aunts and twice that in cousins, and then at least the same again in children of cousins!)

[Tattooedmama]

I wouldnt buy second hand for other people, but my own children i would.
My 8 year old is getting a 2nd hand tab and bike, it will be scratched and dirty in no time so i would rather get one in great condition off ebay

[Justanotherlurker]

You can do what you want, but this martyrdom around buying second hand is getting out of hand IMO.

People relying on others to stock charity shops or sell on ebay as some form of 'look at me thinking about the environment' is the lowest level of environmental activism.

Trying to break away from consumerism is a good thing, but it seems on MN as though it is just the latest 'trend' to tell the world about

[Bluewavescrashing]

People relying on others to stock charity shops or sell on ebay as some form of 'look at me thinking about the environment' is the lowest level of environmental activism.

What if those people are also donating unused items to charity shops? Everyone wins.

[WhatsInAName19]

@Justanotherlurker people who are mindful of waste in this way are probably taking other steps to reduce their environmental impact too. But even if they're not, it's better than doing nothing (well actually, not nothing but actively buying more newly produced stuff all the time) and it's not something to be ashamed of. It's a real pity that people can't have genuine discussions about stuff like this now without being labelled virtue signallers or martyrs or some such.

[Blueshadow]

I wouldn’t really call it martyrdom. It’s more like the thrill of the hunt. You never know what you are going to find, so it can be exciting in a way that shopping in m and s is never going to be. It’s certainly not for everyone. It’s like foraging or mudlarking. You need to be in the right frame of mind to do it. It can yield some truly lovely things. (Victorian photo album, wooden paint box, many lovely cashmere jumpers and cardigans). I only share these things with those who I know will appreciate them.

[JPduck]

We're trialing second hand Lego sets this year, nearly 2/3 cheaper.
Just waiting to see if they come as advertised, complete set🤞🏻 with no missing bits.

[converseandjeans]

wilting I meant buy those items new. Because they won't be a waste?
I think you need to perhaps pair up a recycled item with a new item?
I don't think everyone will appreciate 2nd hand - although I'm happy to use hand me downs & I sell stuff on eBay etc not sure I would want 2nd hand as a gift.
Experience vouchers would be eco friendly.

[Justanotherlurker]

people who are mindful of waste in this way are probably taking other steps to reduce their environmental impact too. But even if they're not, it's better than doing nothing (well actually, not nothing but actively buying more newly produced stuff all the time) and it's not something to be ashamed of. It's a real pity that people can't have genuine discussions about stuff like this now without being labelled virtue signallers or martyrs or some such.

Didn't say it was something to be ashamed of, but it is a new found virtue signalling and martyrdom, especially on MN. It relies on consumerism of charity shops selling items that are still fashionable that can be either seen as 'win' or be sold on ebay, don't have an issue with either to be honest but people ignore the shit that is being dumped on the 3rd world that has decimated the local textile industries because they can virtue signal about buying a 2 year old Reiss dress as a bargain and pretend they are above the consumerist society.

It is the new low level slactavism post to make on social media.

[MamaToTheBabyBears]

We're in a climate crisis. Every single thing that everyone does to reduce their impact is absolutely a good thing. Every single thing bought secondhand instead of new helps.

Don't get me wrong, the clothes industry is awful and most of our clothes are secondhand or ethically/sustainably made. But belittling small changes everyone makes is not helping. It's not helping the planet to deter them, nor can I imagine it helps them strive for better.

Re relying on consumerism of charity shops, what exactly do you mean? Do you mean relying on donations? Unless you are buying something you absolutely need then it could be argued as consumerism, regardless of whether or not you buy it new. But I think it's worse new, because society tells us that something has to be shiny and new or it's somehow less. Although some people are very consumerist with their secondhand shopping, but I'd say more are with new, Yes, charity shops rely on donations, I don't quite get the point if that's what you meant. What do you define as fashionable? Everyone has different tastes. Does it make it worse to you if someone buys something from a charity shop that isn't fashionable? I don't follow fashion, nor do any adults I know! But if it's something they like, why the hell not? Things don't have to be the latest fashion! I bought a rather unfashionable ornament from a charity shop a few days ago, sort of thing you'd expect an old lady to have, but I absolutely love it and it definitely felt like a win when I found it. But I'm sure plenty of others didn't even give it a second look

[caringcarer]

I buy a few good quality second hand toys such as Duplo which i put in a laundry bag and then into dishwasher it looks brand new except no packaging. I also got a huge Brio train track with tunnels, station and loads of trains and my dgs plays with them all of the time. Last Xmas I asked my dd what baby dgs 2 would like and she said Jumperoo but let me get it Mum from Facebook group. She told me it only cost £20 and when we saw it we were suprised because it even came with box and looked barely used. She put rest of money I had given her to buy it in his bank account for when he is older. There is nothing wrong with reusing good quality toys. When I was a child most of oud toys were either hand made or second hand. My uncle made me a wooden dolls house with furniture and my auntie knitted clothing for a doll i had. I had a second hand bike my Dad had painted up for me and I loved all ov them. Now i reflect back i realise all of the hard work my family put into making every Xmas special for me and it gives me a warm glow.

[ThePortIsSunny]

I would buy second hand for my own children and husband but not others. People become a bit funny about reciprocal gifts and price matching so might be hard done by if they spent £££ & you only spent £.

[ThePortIsSunny]

Switch to experience gifts like cinema tokens instead of second hand gifts. It reduces the plastic pile and the recipients will be happy with it rather than pre loved.

[malificent7]

No gidts or one gift each would be ideal...otherwise nowt wrong with 2nd hand.
Food or experience gifts are goid or plants. Not all gifts need to be plastic tat..

[justmyview]

I think OP would be better to ask family and friends not to buy her gifts, or to spend no more than £X, or to buy second hand if possible

Otherwise, I think it's a bit like when A gives B an Oxfam goat, A gets to feel warm and fuzzy, but it's B who goes without a gift

not expecting extended family to shop second hand as it does take more effort. It would be great if they also wanted to, but wouldn't tell someone else how to shop TBH, this comes across a bit like "I'll buy second hand for you, but am expecting you to buy new for me". I wouldn't like that. It should be mutual

[Wiltinglillies]

TBH, this comes across a bit like "I'll buy second hand for you, but am expecting you to buy new for me".

Except for the fact that I'd far, far prefer something second hand. My family know this. Many years ago, my wedding dress was a 2K ex sample that miraculously fit perfectly. It cost me £70.

It's not really a money issue, just sick at seeing shelves of new stuff knowing that the same slightly used items are available and probably have a good few years left in them.

I tried the goat thing the first year Oxfam had them and that was not appreciated at all!

I also tried asking for nothing. That was agreed and then I received gifts anyway, so felt like a right Scrooge.

For those saying it's still consumerism, well, of course it is! The post is all about Christmas ffs. I'm a long was away from off-grid composting loo self sufficiency!!!

Also, I didn't understand the point of the poster who was talking about bundles of clothes sent to Africa. I couldn't see how it related to reducing developed world consumption. Not trying to be disrespectful, I just couldn't get it.

And to those calling virtue signalling - this is an anonymous board. I don't get people who are so ready to shoot people down.

Today's purchase:
Two guitar hero guitars and game - all working perfectly £7

[unlimiteddilutingjuice]

I have given second hand presents before.

A big bundle of Octonauts Toys- much more than I could afford to buy new.
A nice plate in a discontinued pattern that I was lucky enough to find in a charity shop.
A particular book that matches someone's interests perfectly

There's some things that I don't consider as good second hand:

Lego, Jigsaws or Board Games where a missing piece would cause disappointment.
Dolls and figurines with nylon hair that tangles

I also consider Christmas a time for frivolity and for treating people to something nicer than they would have normally.
If I was trying to cut down on waste it would feel more natural to do second hand throughout the year and keep new things as a rare treat for Christmas.

I think for this reason I would find it a bit limiting to attempt to do everything second hand.