Threatening letter from school regarding DD's attendance

[Sofi88]

We received a letter from DD's school yesterday saying DD's attendance is below average, and hence not good enough and had to be improved. The letter was threatening, and the words "Be Careful!" was highlighted in huge letters. The letter goes on to say that we have to make sure DD is in school every day from now on, so that her attendance improves. It also states they may contact the Education Welfare Officer if it does not improve.

Thing is though, DD has been off sick ONE day in the period this letter refers to, and I have picked her up early to go to medical appointments three times. One of these times I picked her up at 12 (only available appointment), but the other two I picked her up at 3:20 - ten minutes before I was due to pick her up anyway.

DD has a medical condition, which she has so far been treated for by her GP and a specialist nurse. She has actually had less appointments than normal this term, due to her now being transferred to a specialist paediatrician at the hospital. Our first appointment there is in December, so her GP and the nurse have told us to simply wait for that appointment unless there are any concerns in between. The school knows about her condition.

And also, she had one day off due to illness, where we phoned in and explained she was too ill to go in, which they said they were fine with. DH then went in at 3:30 to pick up her homework. Apart from this one day and the three times I've had to pick her up early due to medical appointments, she has had no absence!

Doesn't my child have a right to get treated for her condition, as well as a basic right to stay home when she is too ill to go in? Apart from this letter, we haven't received anything else - like them asking for medical evidence, doctor's notes etc. We have simply got the impression everything has been done right. The teacher has not mentioned anything when I've picked her up early for a GP appointment. You'd think they ask for medical evidence before sending out a threatening letter like this? A note from her GP would be no problem at all to provide. Would be a lot nicer to have them ask for that, rather than this threatening letter!

Does anyone know anything about this?

Don't worry about it. She's not even legally required to be there yet. I had a letter and a call from the attendance officer once because my DD had an operation and wasn't allowed back for 2 weeks. They phoned, I explained and they told me not to worry and ended the call. The letters are often generated automatically based on a % and then the human element comes with a call.

Just speak to the school.

13 yr old DD has severe anxiety and depression, and has refused to go to school several time this year so far. Her attendance is very low, but the welfare officer at her school is fully aware, and she has actually told us to ignore any letter we receive about attendance. They are just an automatic thing - if she genuinely hasn’t missed school they will be able to correct it on her record.

find out the specific times they take registration morning and afternoon. DS had a medical issue requiring regular appointments in school time but on those days I will send him into school for the first half hour and then pick him up for the appointment, or will collect him 20 minutes after afternoon registration, and he is marked as present.

I personally wouldnt bother inconveniencing myself taking them in for registration then out 5 minutes later for an appointment. What does the child gain from that?

Thank you so much for the replies! I have talked to a few other parents, who have said the new (!) headteacher is extremely strict and comes across as someone who only cares about her own reputation. DH works with a woman who used to be a teaching assistant at the school and who also have two children there. She said the headteacher is hated by parents and teachers alike, and that when she came in she sacked everyone and hired her own team (whatever that means)..

It came across as this headteacher is someone who doesn't have much empathy towards anyone, and a sick 4-year-old can annoy her as it may put her reputation at risk.. I also heard that she used to be the headteacher at a very low ranked school in a deprived area (if that makes a difference).

All in all, I find it hard to approach someone like that. If I meet with very strict people who lack empathy I normally start to cry, which makes everything worse. This is a Church school and we are regular church goers, and I told the priest about the letter and he looked serious and deep in thought, but didn't really say anything, apart from asking about our daughter's wellbeing. Heard later that he is one of the school governors, so maybe he's not allowed to say anything..

I mean, rewarding healthy children and penalising sick children isn't a very Christian value, is it? I know they need to comply with Ofsted, but surely the headteacher can choose how to word the letter? The letter was signed by the headteacher...

I understand the letter is generic and automated, but would it be so hard to simply add the sentence "if your child has medical needs, please do not worry about this letter", or something similar? Illness is not mentioned with a word in the letter, and it comes across that absence is absence, regardless of reason.

And also, I wouldn't be so upset if it wasn't for the fact that DD really struggles in school as it is. Her behaviour has become really bad after starting school, and she outright refuses to go to bed, saying she wants more time with me and that she is in school for too long. Really don't know what to do, as I feel so trapped.

You have to stand up to bullies.
Make an appointment with her to discuss the letter and how it made you feel. Don’t assume that she has no empathy but if you are treated poorly, write to the governors asking for an apology, then involve the local press.

Is it the only school available. My dc are grown up now and I think an unhappy child should be mived in a flash.

@Sofi88
"Rewardng healthy children and penalising sick children"
That is such brilliant articulation of why I think attenhance drives are immoral. I'm welling up. It only gets worse too, secondary reward systems are v bad - eg special trips for 100% attendance.
Hope this isn't too upsetting, sorry.
You can ignore the letter, they literally can't do anything / enforce it.
Regarding 80% earlier, that's also so sad. Schools aren't that effective that one day off a week makes much difference, it's a myth to boost their statistics.

The Pink Floyd lyrics all in all your just another brick in the wall spring to mind

They can't enforce for sickness /medical appts. It would be laughed out of court.
They can enforce for unauthorised hols / LOTS of unreasoned days off, eg: to go shopping. (You'd be surprised what peps do! And, I know this due to my profession).

@OhTheRoses There are three schools in our area, and all are in high demand and always over subscribed. Except our school wasn't this year, as everyone who applied got in, which surprised me. We picked it because of its connection to our church, but it honestly feels more like a bootcamp than a school at the moment.

@Mrspenfold123 I've only been told she has no empathy. I've never met her and don't even know what she looks like. We've only been in the school two months

As it's a church school, next time you get the letter asking for money attach a copy of the attendance letter and note that's why you have halved your contribution.

DD was at a church secondary for two years. The demands for money whilst at the same time not fulfilling all that was promised at admissions was eye watering.

Simple solution: I contributed the minimum and moved dd. Took the governors another three years to get shot of a poor head though.

I am sure your priest will raise this behind the scenes and you may well not be the only parent raising concerns with him.

Put her on the waiting list for the other schools. You will be amazed how much movement there is at this stage.

OP I understand how upsetting this letter must have been but for your own sake you need to develop a thicker skin and learn to brush stuff like this off and only worry about stuff that really needs worrying about.

Schools these days can be very bureaucratic and as a mother with a child with medical needs you are going to get this stupid stuff all the time. Don't let them cause you stress you've done nothing wrong.

You say you find the head teacher intimidating but what about your DH. Could he speak to the school instead if you are worried you won't be able to make the points you want to make? It's his daughter too and it doesn't need to be just up to you to sort out. Even if he can't go into the school he could schedule a phone call with the head.

I agree you need a thicker skin.

She's had 1.5 days off and that will be 4-5% this early in term.

My ds has had 1 day off and his is 97% 🤷‍♀️

You know why she's been off and the school can't actually do anything. They can threatened EWO etc but the most that will come is them asking why she was off "Ill one day and medical appointment".
They just log that and usually the ewo will have a word with school about checking facts and being realistic as they don't have the time to chase non issue cases!

Seriously - stop allowing this letter to have such an effect. It's a stupid generic letter based on a computer spitting out a statistic.

I would however be taking the fact your dd isn't settled and unhappy seriously. Any way you can state you'll be putting her PT for a period? She's not compulsory school age and may benefit from just mornings at the moment and building up. If her medical condition is likely adding to her tiredness you have a little bit more of an argument and would use that as evidence.

If the attendance for a child drops below a certain percentage, which is very easy in the first couple of months of the school year, but tends to balance out later on, it tends to trigger an alert and the letters are pretty much automatically generated. Don't worry about it, even if educational welfare got involved, which seems unlikely, you have valid reasons and the doctor will have it on record that you were there those days. I'm surprised it triggered for absence at the end of the day, unless the school do their afternoon registration right at the end. In our school if a child is more than 10 minutes late for registration it is recorded as an absence. Someone else said that although an appointment first thing in the morning may seem less disruptive to their education, leaving just after registration and coming back is actually better for their attendance (on paper).

Funnily I’m about to get a letter similar to you for my ds, and the ludicrously of the situation boggles me. Ds has started immunotherapy for his allergies which involves him missing the last lesson on a Tuesday of school each week. Prior to starting this I spoke to the school advised them of the situation and asked what polices the school have in place as I didn’t want him to a) fall behind and b) get in to trouble for absence. I explained that we had gone to great lengths to get appointments for as late as possible so that he would be in for as much of the school day as was feasible. The school then turned around and said that if he wasn’t in for the whole day they would count it as authorised absence but as he would have to sign out during the day no matter what the reason it would count as unauthorised absence. There was nothing that could be done and I should expect letters from the school and the LEA. Obviously I have the letters etc from the hospital to back up why he is off and will happily fight whatever comes but being a responsible parent in this instance results in a worse situation than if I was irresponsible one.

Just speak to the EWO and explain. DS had quite a lot of absence last year compared to his siblings because he has autism and reacts differently when unwell. We spoke to the EWO who was very understanding, the school had not told them about his ASD.

I too have had a similar letter about my son's attendance. He has had to have a huge amount of orthodontic work and procedures and I would often try and plan the appointments either first thing in the morning or at lunch time if possible to avoid disruption to his education as much as possible, but because he was either missing the morning or afternoon register he was marked off for the whole session. Now I arrange them mid morning or mid afternoon, more disruptive to everyone really but it ticks the attendance boxes. Absolutely crazy.

I have no idea of our son's attendance level at the moment, I believe that every absence he has had for sickness or an un-reschedulable appointment is justified. So I don't worry.

Those of you saying that an exception should be made for medical appointments, and isn't this disability discrimination ... I doubt it. My son attends a specialist school, most if not all of the children there have above the average number of medical appointments - when there is only one special care dentist, we cannot all have appts out of school hours! And even his school issues the generic letters. I've come to the conclusion that they have to do issue them to tick a box with the LEA.

So sad there is so little empathy. I would book a meeting with her class teacher and ask for a copy of the work missed for the half day and the two 10mins she missed as obviously it is so vital after that letter! So if she missed ten mins of colouring, there you are - she is up to date! If she missed 10 mins of reading, you can catch up! Then when they phon enough to get her home as she is being ill, you can remind them that she cannot miss school, not even 10mins due to how vital her absence is!!

Just ignore it.
It’s completely ridiculous when you consider that no-one seriously monitors kids that are home schooled for the quality of education they either do or don’t receive.

The English schooling system is falling so far behind systems in other parts of the world because they focus on the wrong things.

We spoke to the EWO who was very understanding, the school had not told them about his ASD.
That happened to a DF of mine too, she pointed out the other siblings had rarely missed school as well and found the EWO to be sympathetic when they had the full picture.

Ofsted expect over 96% for a school to have a hope of getting a result of outstanding when inspected, that's why they are so strict.

What irritates me is the way schools suddenly lose interest in attendance when it suits them, notably when children have SEN and the school isn't bothering to meet their needs. It's so hypocritical to get stroppy about some pupils' attendance whilst simultaneously operating illegal part time timetables and unlawful exclusions for others.