AIBU?
To be sick of them hopping in and out of my garden whenever they feel the need?
CymaticPrincess88 · 13/11/2019 09:19
Next door neighbour, moved in very recently and immediatly started building works, I have no right to be annoyed about that I know.
Part of this 'work' involved chopping a tree down (he's building a conservatory) and then had to get some kind of mini digger involved to get the stump out. Okay, fair enough. In order to do this he told us (he did not ask) that he was taking the fence panel down, so they could better access it to get the stump out. We felt we didn't have much choice so we said ok.
It's been 2 weeks since the fence panel has been taken down, and they haven't put it back up. We asked them 2 days ago if it could be put back up as as far as we are concerned the reason the fence panel needed to come down was because of the stump and nothing more.
Anyway what is really winding me up is the builders he has hired, keep stepping into and standing in my garden all day whilst they are here, I know its a petty thing to be wound up about it but they are right next to my living room window and keep staring if I so much as glance outside, and if they are in next doors front garden, they stop what they are doing and stare at me, usually while I am putting my SEN DS onto his school transport, it's making me really uncomfortable, and I don't know what to do.
Do I keep bugging him to put the panel back up? Do I have any right to dictate who comes into my garden? I'm sure I do, but I am happy to be proven wrong.
I have generalised anxiety disorder so if you are wondering why I am getting so wound up about it all thats probably the reason
sorry for the essay
BiddyPop · 13/11/2019 09:24
Knock on the door of neighbor this evening and say that you had given permission for panel to be temporarily removed for a specific purpose - removal of tree stump.
As that is now done, you have already asked builders to reinstate the panel, but they haven’t, so could the neighbour please make sure that this happens as a matter of urgency tomorrow morning.
Nice and polite and matter if fact. No need for any conflict as you have facilitated their request and now you just want things back to how they should be without further delay.
Thanks so much.
Good luck with the building, hope it doesn’t take too long, night now.
Smelborp · 13/11/2019 09:24
You absolutely have a right to ask that they do not step into your garden.
It would be nice to put the fence back up, but I don’t think there’s a legal requirement to have something over a boundary. Who’s fence is it?
The staring and general behaviour isn’t great but not much you can do about that.
But yes, you can certainly tell them not to enter your property.
CymaticPrincess88 · 13/11/2019 09:29
It's on the left hand side of my garden, so I think it is actually his fence per se.
I'm going to send my partner round later to ask again, and to say we don't give them permission to go in our garden, at this point, I don't care if they hate us! This morning they were using a masonry drill at 8am! I was up anyway obviously cause: kids, but scared the shit out of all of us!
Bluntness100 · 13/11/2019 09:31
Ok try to take. Deep breath.
Are you sure they are continually staring at you as you describe? This would be unusual and they'd get little work done. Are you sure they don't just glance over and back again?
As for the fence panel. It's fine to ask the neighbour what the plan is, I'm assuming it's not up yet for space.
As for the stepping in your garden, how far in are they coming? Of course you're within your rights to say they can't step over the boundary, and no they shouldn't do it, but if it's just literally stepping over and for not long yes it would look petty.
Clearly though you're very disturbed by it all. And mental health issues can clearly cause what may be a minor inconvenience and irritant to escalate into something intolerable.
Ultimately you need to do what works best for your mental health.
StrictlyNameChangin · 13/11/2019 10:05
I think given your update I'd leave them to it for another couple of days, then go out and tell them to get orfta my lawn! In the meantime next time you're outside with your son (or you see them clearly stop and stare at him through your window), open the window and shout in an assertive manner "IS THERE A REASON WHY YOU'RE STOPPING WORK AND STARING AT MY DISABLED SON?"
SunshineAngel · 13/11/2019 10:19
I don't know what it is about having building work done that makes people think they can do what they like. We went on holiday for a week in June, and when we got back the whole row of fencing had been taken down (our fencing, our side) and their building materials (bricks, wooden beams, rolls of turf, flagstones) were all in our garden!!!!
I knocked on immediately and asked what the hell was going on, and they said sorry but there was nowhere else they could put them (how about their own garden?!) to which I said I appreciate that, but that's not my problem. It was the middle of summer, they hadn't asked, and I spend most of my day outside in summer (WFH) and I wouldn't feel comfortable if the builders were in and out of the garden.
They wouldn't move them, I couldn't do a great deal about it as everything was too heavy, and when the work was finally finished a month later, my grass was completely ruined, as obviously it hadn't got any sunlight due to things being piled up on it.
So I am NOT happy, and really, really sympathise with your situation at the moment.
churchandstate · 13/11/2019 10:24
So many cheeky people in the world whose idea of justification is, “Well, what else can I do?” 😂 We don’t care! It’s not our problem.
I would say, “You don’t have permission to come into my garden. Please don’t do it again.” And put up a fence if I felt that strongly about it.
Obviously if my neighbours were polite and asked, I wouldn’t usually have a problem with it.
Yummymummy2020 · 13/11/2019 10:24
I’m having the same issue with a neighbours extension! I looked up to see one physically cupping his eyes to try get a better view through our tilted blinds, very nosy and annoying especially since they used a ladder to climb into our back garden without asking to smooth the wall at the top of the neighbours extension that peaks over our boundary wall. I’m also considering mentioning this as I got a fright at the time seeing a random man in a tracksuit peering in at me with a ladder perched against the wall.
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