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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Behaviour on trains

80 replies

Ghoulestofmums · 13/11/2019 08:00

Inspired by the boiled egg gate thread, I understand that eating smelly food on trains and putting on make up on trains are both no no’s for MNers. (I rarely use trains so have no strong opinions).

However, I have an annual lengthy train trip and wonder how to avoid annoying fellow passengers, I have to leave home by 5.00am to drive to the station. Catch train at 6.00am, arrive 9.30 am, straight to all day meeting, catch train home at 4.30,pm (usually arriving back at station with 10 minutes maximum to spare) and arrive home around 8.15. Lunch is a working lunch with a few titchy sandwiches laid on,

Now, pre 5.00am I can’t face breakfast, or putting on make up. So the only chance I have to put on make up is on the train (colleagues waiting for me at destination station). And the only chance of food is a Danish etc from the station.

On the way back, after hardly any lunch (and it’s a working lunch anyway) I don’t have time to eat at the station but can only buy a baguette etc to eat on the train. By the time I get home at 8.15pm ish, I’m far too tired to eat.

Basically, then, my only down time is the train. What should I do?

OP posts:
nancy75 · 13/11/2019 08:02

It’s fine to eat on the train, just not stuff that stinks.
A few days ago I sat next to a man eating a curry on the train - that’s the kind of thing that’s not ok!

Vulpine · 13/11/2019 08:03

Ooh tough one. Get up earlier to put on make up or dont wear make up and eat non smelly food on train. What thousands of people do every day.

runoutofideasnow · 13/11/2019 08:03

Honestly just carry on and do what you need to do. Obviously don't eat something smelly on the train but sandwiches are usually a safe bet and doing your make up is fine. I doubt the train will be packed at that time anyway so you might have seats to yourself?

Spam88 · 13/11/2019 08:06

I don't know why anyone has a problem with people putting make up on on a train, so crack on. Eating is also fine, sure try to be considerate re smells, but the food trolleys only ever seem to have egg or tuna sandwiches so 🤷‍♀️

Original poster
Ghoulestofmums · 13/11/2019 08:08

Vulpine - get up earlier? I already have to get up before 5.00 am. In what universe, bluntly, s that suggestion practical?

Thank you for comments about non smelly food, oh, and I don’t buy crisps either - the noise of others eating gives me the rage so it’s not fair to do the same,

Re make up, I travel from A to K say (cross country). Between C nd F the train is heaving with Commuters but after that it’s quiet so Hope putting on make up isnt that infuriating!

OP posts:
Fatshedra · 13/11/2019 08:08

I don't see putting on makeup is that bad. Most people blank others on trains. What I hate is unsocial things like nose picking, picking at scabs, bad eating manners. Those are hard to ignore.
Maybe it's because I'm an old woman - no one wants to sneak looks at me Smile

CodenameVillanelle · 13/11/2019 08:09

Seriously stop overthinking it
If you put makeup on either use the toilet or make sure you are turned away from people and not elbowing your neighbour every time you do anything but otherwise i don't understand why anyone would care.
Food wise choose non stinky food and make sure you don't spread crumbs all around. That's it.

OllyBJolly · 13/11/2019 08:10

I do that kind of journey every month. I get a porridge and a pastry from Pret for my train breakfast and a ham salad roll for the journey home.

I always do my make up on the train - even the short commuter journey. I'm never the only one. didn't even know it "Wasn't allowed" !

TaxFool · 13/11/2019 08:12

Makeup rules = no elbowing your neighbour and no powder flying over other people.

Food rules = nothing that stinks and don't get hammered.

HauntedPinecone · 13/11/2019 08:13

I don't know of a single person in real life who would give a shit about someone putting make up on, whilst on a train! I'm sure it's just a MN thing. Do your bloody make up if you want!

bohemia14 · 13/11/2019 08:13

I commute by train. In my view people are much less tolerant of smelly food in the morning than in the evening. Same with noisy conversations. So stick to the Danish.

You're overthinking this. Don't worry about it.

Gottobefree · 13/11/2019 08:14

Im a daily communter in London. Honestly it's fine to put on make up and eat on the train ! No smelly food. So a pastry or sandwich is fine. Most morning I have a hot chocolate and see people doing their make up.

With make up make sure it's simple and not messy. People just don't like it if you take up loads of room and make a mess. Just be respectful of everyones space and it will be fine.

Bezalelle · 13/11/2019 08:16

The worst behaviour, IMO, is noise pollution, be it from tinny headphones, watching videos with the sound up, or inane conversations.

Lipz · 13/11/2019 08:17

As others have said don't eat smelly foods or anything that requires the rattling of bags. Crisps make me want to rip my ears off my head !! I just don't understand the constant bag rattling, the sucking and smacking that sounds like a dog licking his balls and the crunching that sounds like they are chewing on glass !!

With regards to make up, I come across this daily, it's not so much the putting on of the make up, it's the constant opening and closing of compacts, that little clicking really gives me the rage !!! Then the rooting around the make up bag !!! Put your makeup on before you leave, that's what I do, I just get up 20 minutes earlier. You're not going to loose a whole heap of sleep getting up 20 minutes earlier.

ShatnersWig · 13/11/2019 08:18

Behaviour on trains is worse than it used to be. Used to commute to London two or three times a week 20 years ago and occasionally used trains at the weekend for non-work stuff and the difference today is really noticeable. Whether it's parents allowing kids to clamber over seats and scream at the top of their lungs (and same parents seemingly incapable of talking to their children in a normal speaking voice, only at full volume), or people coughing and sneezing without putting their hand over their mouth, or getting on a train early in the morning and pulling out a six pack and drinking three of them in a 45-minute journey, or groups of drunken men being obnoxious to other passengers, or people who carry on very loud phone conversations as if we all want to hear them (yes, YOU Anne Widdecombe you evil harpy), or people with smelly food.

Only thing wrong with public transport is the public as the old joke goes.

HopefullyAnonymous · 13/11/2019 08:19

I’m always in awe of people who can put makeup on on the train. I’d end up blinded by a mascara wand or with lipstick accidentally smeared all over my face. It’s a skill! Not sure why it would bother anyone though .

Sandsnake · 13/11/2019 08:26

Danish is totally fine.

Make-up is ok as long as it doesn’t go anywhere and you don’t jostle anyone. Definitely best to do it when quieter, as you do.

I agree that behaviour on trains is generally getting less considerate. Luckily for me the passengers on my commuter train are largely OK.

Original poster
Ghoulestofmums · 13/11/2019 08:30

Ooh, I’ve just remembered. Coming back one year on this train, in the packed commuter section of the journey I was watching a film on my iPad through speakers and in the other 3 seats were 3 women shrieking and practically shouting at each other, a bit of a pain, but, hey, live and let live. Then two of them got off and the remaining one asked me to turn off the sound as it was annoying her!!! it want even a loud film! I was too gob,smacked to say anything sadly

OP posts:
70isaLimitNotaTarget · 13/11/2019 08:33

Make-up is fine as long as you aren't painting your nails , filing your nails or clipping your nails ( see a theme here !)

I was on an overnight bus , there were loads of "Considerations"
No hot food (cold food ok)
Hot drinks only in a lidded cup
No phone calls
No music
No smoking/drugs/alcohol

Just out of London Victoria it was noticed that someone had a kebab.
It bloody stank.
Co-driver chucked the kebab in a bin on the pavement (should've dumped the arse that bought it too Hmm )

HopefullyAnonymous · 13/11/2019 08:34

OP that would drive me crazy. I can’t stand hearing other people’s music/TV on the train and you were extremely unreasonable not to use earphones.

MrPan · 13/11/2019 08:38

OP - no problem with make up on train thing. It's just another MN small minded bollocks thing.
Smelly food is a bit different, but am sure you are socially-skilled enough to account for this.

Original poster
Ghoulestofmums · 13/11/2019 08:47

Oh God, I’m so sorry - of course I meant earphones, not speakers!!

OP posts:
StroppyWoman · 13/11/2019 08:50

OP the film thing would have driven me crazy. Only ever headphones, and not those that leak noise.

KatherineJaneway · 13/11/2019 08:51

I agree with pp, it's not people eating that others have an issue with, it's food that stinks.

SpamChaudFroid · 13/11/2019 08:52

The only time a person annoyed me on a train, he was drunk at 9am and kept on making loud racist remarks about the other passengers/people waiting on platforms. When I got off the train he called me a "fucking idiot" as I was navigating my suitcase onto the platform.

What you describe OP wouldn't annoy me at all. They wouldn't sell food on trains if you were expected to save it until you arrived at your destination.