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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

SIL baby name

131 replies

Springtime3 · 10/11/2019 19:58

AIBU - I have a 6 month old Annabella, we call her Bella for short which I’m sure will get shortened to Belle. My sister in law is pregnant, due 04/2020 she’s just told me her girls names is Belle! I was speechless when she told me I just think It’s too similar ?? Aibu to feel angry over this?!?

OP posts:
fancytiles · 10/11/2019 22:10

That is really weird and a bit embarrassing for her!
Take it as a compliment, she clearly thinks you have good taste but I think she'll probably change her mind by April tbh! Or at least people will tell her to!

peanacat · 10/11/2019 22:14

I think the fact that HER son calls your DD Belle makes the fact she has chosen that name potentially for her baby just wrong tbh. I would be really put out as well if someone I was close to named their baby a very similar name (nickname or not). My daughter is Georgia, and I have a second cousin called Georgia, who we are not at all close to as a family (I’d actually forgotten there was one in the family already 🙈 until she was about a month old!). Any closer than that and I would definitely be choosing a completely different name. After all, it’s your child and within the family you want them to be special and the only one, imo.

And the posters saying that you think you ‘own’ all of the variations of the name, no, that isn’t what you are saying. Bella and Belle are ridiculously similar and I can see how maybe eventually Bella could get shortened to Belle as people get lazy saying names and shorten even already short names! I think I’d be too nervous to say something personally, but I think if she is serious about it then I’d want to just mention it.

Nodnol · 10/11/2019 22:17

I have an Isabella. We call her Bella or Bells but I’ve never heard her called Belle. Still too close though.

I would be hoping she changes her mind or has a boy.

Sarahlou252 · 10/11/2019 22:18

These kind of threads always say you don't own a name, but I would find it really odd - I had a friend who had a daughter called Olivia, her sister had a little boy she called Oliver less than a year later. She had all sorts of conflicting feelings about it. Its just something I would never do, if it were me I know I would just choose another name.

Hanab · 10/11/2019 22:19

Its annoying but not much that you can do OP

Veterinari · 10/11/2019 22:20

Does your DB not have any input into his child’s name? Why is it only your SIL you’re pissed off with?

thunderandsunshine01 · 10/11/2019 22:24

I agree with @Rainycloudyday

tillytoodles1 · 10/11/2019 22:25

It's a good job you're not a Catholic. My brother is called James as are about six first cousins. Another is called Michael, about the same. All the girls share about ten names between us, and most of us have a similar second name and confirmation name. We are all referred to by our full name e.g. Anne Smith, as so many have the same first first name, not even our married names, but our maiden names. I have over 50 first cousins.

phoenixrosehere · 10/11/2019 22:29

Yabu.

Belle and Bella sound completely different and you did name your child Annabella and decided to shorten it to Bella. Your SIL could have had her heart set on Belle for years. Is she supposed to find a different name just to please you? Besides, she may see baby and choose a different name, if she doesn’t, not the end of the world. A bit ridiculous to be angry over it.

Cryalot2 · 10/11/2019 22:29

You have chosen Annabella , Belle is different.
You can't expect the monopoly on all versions of the name or do you?
Dhs sister called her son a name, I called our son the same. I always loved it and nothing else was close, it was also a family name.
There was never any problem as both had different surnames and were known as Name x and Name y . They did not go to same schools or anything so no mix up .
It may be name that means something to her .
Its no big deal , she might yet change her mind, but just never worry.

NotaWagon · 10/11/2019 22:30

Um bit of stereotyping there. This is not common practice any more. My Dad who is in his mid 70s had two cousins called margaret, bith named after their grandmother. But they would have been named 70+ years ago.
People don't do this anymore. Im in Ireland so it isnt a Catholic thing. It was A Thing 75 years ago.

tillytrotter1 · 10/11/2019 22:33

Keep using Annabelle or Bella and refer to the expected sprog as Ding-Dong in the suggestive manner of Lesley Phillips, they may change their minds.

yikesanotherbooboo · 10/11/2019 22:33

OP I don't think you should say anything to your sil about this.

LovePoppy · 10/11/2019 22:38

I’d be annoyed
But I’d force myself to get over it

Raspberrytruffle · 10/11/2019 22:44

Really? Your child has already got her name so why are you so insecure? Yes its annoying but as I've gotten older I'm more chilled out, think of it as flattering that you have chosen such a beautiful name its inspired your sil to try and recreate it. I mean I'd understand if you sil said oh I'm naming my Dc annabel the 1st then yes I'd see where you are coming from shes not actually given the same name though has she? You sound like me when I was fresh and young at 21years old , now I'm middle aged and have a meh attitude Grin

StartingAgainID · 10/11/2019 22:54

My cousin and I (8 months apart) have the same name. Never thought of it as weird growing up - infact we quite liked it.

Belle is a lovely name. It's been popular for ages. I don't see how you can lay an exclusive claim to it. I'd only understand your point of view if the name was something you'd made up yourself.

AdoreTheBeach · 10/11/2019 23:06

Oh my. Had a real chuckle at the babybel!

Namelessinseattle · 10/11/2019 23:07

My cousin born 18 months after me has the male version of my name. Was never an issue. Literally only occurred to me when I was pregnant that our names were so similar and it could have been avoided, I asked my mom did she mind when her sister announced his name and she didn't care at all.

FREEM · 10/11/2019 23:09

think its strange you shorten to bella but consider tjat might change.
your name is Annabella . Her name is Belle
shes not chosen the same name.

MaryShelley1818 · 10/11/2019 23:13

Totally different names. Why should she not use her favourite baby name just in case you decide to change your childs nickname? It really doesn’t matter.

Whoops75 · 10/11/2019 23:16

Your dd will be Bella and hers will be Belle.

No problem imo
I think Anna is far better than Bella as a nn

BumbleBeee69 · 10/11/2019 23:26

Your dd will be Bella and hers will be Belle.

No problem imo

Of course there's a flippin problem Confused

they're so alike it's ridiculous ...Hmm

NotBatman · 10/11/2019 23:28

Sorry. Your child's nickname is now "Bella". Grin

JasBBGG · 10/11/2019 23:41

I'd be fuming. I say that as a mum with one of the same names you mention. Neither variation is common. She's being ridiculous.

LionelRitchieStoleMyNotebook · 10/11/2019 23:43

Have you paid any attention when you are in public? We went to the zoo in the summer and about eighty percent of the girls were being called Bella, Belle, Isabelle/Isobel/Isabel, Annabelle, and the rest were Olivia. If you were bothered about the likelihood of her sharing a name with someone you know, you should've picked a less common name.